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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU that adults can talk to children without their parents permission?

19 replies

RhiandJoe · 08/05/2017 21:24

AIBU that I can talk to a child when their parents have asked me to talk through them?
A child who plays with my children is often on my drive, playing with my children's toys etc which I have no major issue with expect when they don't treat my things and property with respect. When I have asked the child to mind the cars or not damage my children's toys they just answer back saying I need to talk to their patents.
Their parents don't even apologies for damage caused to toys, their only concern is I spoke to their child. AIBU?

OP posts:

harderandharder2breathe · 08/05/2017 21:26

Yanbu

It takes a village to raise a child, as they say.

Certainly if the child is playing with your child's toys without permission then you should be able to tell them not to.

And surely they'd rather you spoke to their child than the child get hit by a car!

Original poster

RhiandJoe · 08/05/2017 21:33

Thank you harderandharder2breathe I thought the world had gone crazy!
The problem with the car was the children damaging my stationary car, although I do warn them about the moving cars too.

I expect other adults to talk to my children if they are doing wrong etc, we can't be there every minute

OP posts:

Fruitcorner123 · 08/05/2017 21:46

Also if they are on your drive and your car it's your property. I would tell them firmly to leave your property and stop playing with your children's toys. If they continue go back to parents and tell them. Parents like this, who won't discipline their own children, are a real pain. How old are the children?

Funnyfarmer · 08/05/2017 21:53

I would go and tell there parents if they damage any more of your property next time you will coming round with a bill.
It's just bloody cheeky.

Original poster

RhiandJoe · 08/05/2017 21:55

The child is 10 or 11, mine are 7 and 4 so too young to be going elsewhere to play really.

I just don't want to be back and forth the parents, especially since they don't do anything other than question what I have said to their child!

OP posts:

AnnieAnoniMouse · 08/05/2017 21:57

Why do you let them play/stay? I wouldn't be putting up with that cheek.

DonkeyOaty · 08/05/2017 22:00

Tell the kid to clear orf.

Your kids play in the back garden, problem solved.

nocake · 08/05/2017 22:02

I'd tell the child to get off my drive and not come back until they learn to behave properly.

FeckinCrutches · 08/05/2017 22:04

Why on earth are you letting them play on your drive,tell them to bugger off home. They are far too old to be playing with your kids anyway

Mothervulva · 08/05/2017 22:07

Definitely tell them to go away.

Atenco · 08/05/2017 22:09

Why do you let them play/stay? I wouldn't be putting up with that cheek

If the parents aren't around, the nearest adult can tell them off, IMHO. If they are seriously out of line, that is when you go to their parents.

ijustwantfiveminutespeace · 08/05/2017 22:14

Why do the parents ask their children what you have said to them? That's weird, don't you think.
I always say to my friends if my DC misbehaves or anything g please tell them off. I am not precious about that.

ChasedByBees · 08/05/2017 22:16

If you can't talk to them, they can't enter your property. Simple.

BackforGood · 08/05/2017 22:18

Of course YANBU.
If they don't want you to speak to their child, then they need to not let their child out of their site.
If I'd had that response, I'd have sent them packing off my property, tbh.

user1487941567 · 08/05/2017 22:25

I wouldn't have this, sorry. I've told my neighbours kids to stop swearing, to stop vandalising cars, to get the hell out of my garden etc. The mother doesn't like it either but I don't like her horrible kids. You can talk to who you want, esp if they are being little gits!

ThouShallNotPass · 08/05/2017 22:33

My house is usually overrun with lots of local kids who are friends with my three. (Honestly, you'd think I run a bloody youth club there's that many hanging around!) But as welcoming I am, no way in hell will I ever put up with cheekiness and I certainly wouldn't be having a child round who I was not allowed to tell them not to do something. I'm afraid the only thing I would have to say to them is, "Sorry, you can't play on my drive/with my kid. Please go home."

StarryIllusion · 08/05/2017 22:37

If my kids were being horrible little shits I would be more than happy for any adult in the vicinity to give them an earful and send them on their way.

PodgeBod · 08/05/2017 22:47

Tell the kid to clear off. The age gap is a bit too wide to be honest and if the kid is so brazen, it could easily lead to worse trouble.

avamiah · 08/05/2017 22:50

I only have my daughters friends over to play with their family's consent so I have never come across this and nor do I wish to.
However, 4 or more girls playing together and there is always a few disagreements but I always say that if you can't play nicely together then you won't be playing at all and will all go home.
It always works.
Up to now.😬

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