to think I'm not having a mid life crisis just because I want to get fit at 40

[Bigboombangcrash]

I have recently started running and absolutely love it. Bizzarely, this is the first time in my life I have ever enjoyed exercise and so I suppose friends and family are surprised by the new me. Instead of encouragement or enthusiasm all I seem to get is ridicule and I am made fun of for having a mid life crisis. This has actually made me doubt myself and wonder if I actually am! Has anyone else got fit in their 40's (and kept it up) and it has nothing to do with mid life crisis at all?

Define 'mid life crisis'.

Does it matter if you're having one or not?

You doing something you like and getting fit too.

Nothing else matters.

Ignore them. You are being very sensible. Perhaps it is a mid-life crisis in a way (awareness of ageing and mortality and the need to do something about it), but at least it is manifesting itself in a healthy and useful way - not like you've got yourself a sports car and a toyboy (or have you?)

Tell them it's definitely a MLC. It was either take up running, or take up shagging the new guy at work. It could still be both.

Well I'm 43 and did something last week I always swore I would never do. I joined a gym. To be fair it was because I wanted to have somewhere I could go swimming whenever I wanted as the two nearest council pool hours are rubbish as it's shut most of the time I would like to use it for lessons, private bookings etc. I can go for a swim (adults only after 7pm) any time between 6.30am - 10pm all week long then have an unwind in the steam room or sauna. BUT as there were some exercise machines there, I thought I might have a go. Surprised myself I didn't hate it. Only doing small amounts so far but if I spend 30 mins gym, 20 mins swim, 15 mins unwind three times a week, my fitness will be better and probably my mental health too. Not a crisis. Go for it!

I can't understand why anyone would comment negatively about anyone exercising.

I too am trying to get fit at 40 and think it's inportantt to look after your health in midlife and onwards...

maybe they are jealous, the others, I would rise above it and ignore. Good luck with your continued healthiness.

I go to body balance class with swimming twice a week, and pilates at the local gym. It;s great, I love it. In pilates, feel like a spring chicken as many are 60+.

Seeing you make positive steps to get healthy makes them feel bad for not trying, so they make themselves feel better by putting down your efforts.

I think everyone who has suddenly gotten fit as an unfit adult has probably experienced a bit of this. The fact that you can do it is proof that they could do it too, so they feel guilty for not bothering.

Just ignore it. I get some of it too. I just turned 49 and right before Christmas following an emergency gall bladder removal I decided, right, this is it and started to finally lose the extra weight and exercise. I've joined a gym and have, to my amazement, discovered that I love any class that uses weights. I also cycle and have lost just over two stone (putting me on the healthy weight bracket) and have a bit of muscle for the first time in my life!

I don't know why people have to be disparaging.

Good on you. I took up running and joined a gym at 43 and I'm now planning to learn to swim. Your friends and family are a bunch of unsupportive twunts.

Great to hear from others loving getting fit!!! Makes me wonder why I never bothered before, but something seems to have clicked in me now. Part of the attraction may be that it is actually something I am doing just for ME after years of looking after dc, home etc and not really putting myself first. Long may it continue - I've never felt better.

In some families mine included getting laughed at and slagged off is par for the course, its the british way.

I remember my mum many years ago losing weight in her late 50s and while we were all very supportive of it she did become a bit of a diet and fitness bore and she didn't even realise she was doing it she was just so wrapped up in her new regime. So just remember its fine to share your new passion but becareful not to bore others or become judgey, I think it is too difficult to tell if your doing it yourself so perhaps ask someone close if your getting on their nerves a bit with it all.

Tell them it's either exercise or an affair with a 20 year old... then sign up for a marathon and run it wearing a shirt saying "fuck the lot of you!".

I took up running last year in my 40s as well. DD is getting older and I want to keep up with her. I do get some incredulity, but mostly encouragement.

Good for you. Who cares if it's MLF. I am 41 and just started too. I haven't exercised since school and forgot how a really good workout feels. Keep going.

Good for you. I've started badminton and tennis classes and love both. Most of the other attendees are women in their forties and fifties :)

It's jealousy. Because they can't get off there own backsides!

I'm 43, joined the gym 6 months ago and loving it.

I've been told more than once that 4 classes a week makes me "obsessed".

I thought the guidelines for a healthy lifestyle was activity on 5 days per week.....

I'll carry on doing it for me, thank you very much!

You are definitely not having a midlife crisis. Your 'friends' are taking the piss because you're making them feel bad about being lazy and unfit (and probably overweight).

They'll probably be encouraging you to eat unhealthy stuff and telling you you're 'skinny' as well when the running starts making you visibly slimmer, if they haven't already.