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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Selfish husband?

13 replies

royalyfedup · 07/05/2017 21:12

So, a while ago we borrowed / was offered some money from my gran to pay for renovations / work to be done in our home. We set up a payment plan to pay her back and are doing so ! Near the end of work something went wrong and we needed a little more , we found a lump of the money through tightening our belts and saving but she then offered the little extra we needed to get works completed, we agreed this would be paid back by the end of may/June time and kept separate from our monthly instalment from original loan .
Now my husband needs a new car and has a loan coming to get one ( couldn't get one before for renovations otherwise we would've had one then ) which is affordable to pay back with very little interest , he wants to spend the whole amount on a car and I say we should first pay back my gran for her extra help as would then be difficult to pay both loans, which would still leave a good amount for a car , he wants to spend the whole lot on a car and add the rest of the money we owe to the instalment plan !!!!! This is unfair and going back on an agreement that was made
Aibu to be pissed off with him ? I feel I need to stand my ground on this one

OP posts:
royalyfedup · 10/05/2017 16:22

.

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Rarity75 · 10/05/2017 16:24

Agree that's unfair and somewhat taking the piss if he is driving around in a new car whilst still owing money. Not good for familial relations and shows a lack of respect or value for the help you have received.

CurlyMango · 10/05/2017 20:15

He needs to follow though with what was agreed. That's fair and then your gran gets her money back as expected.

PeaFaceMcgee · 10/05/2017 20:24

How rude and disrespectful of him. Your poor gran - imagine if she saw him swanning about in his new car like a twat whilst her generosity gets completely taken for granted.

Self-centred, reckless arsewipe. He'll just have to wait until your debts are repaid.

TheNaze73 · 10/05/2017 20:25

He's taking the piss, just thinking it.

Goldfishjane · 10/05/2017 20:26

Selfish, entitled, mean, rude
Is it possible he will try to never pay her back?

LilacSpatula · 10/05/2017 20:27

Horrid idea - would he be suggesting this if it was his Nan?

PrettyGoodLife · 10/05/2017 20:31

Agree with you, stand. Your ground. An agreement is an agreement!

royalyfedup · 10/05/2017 20:40

Thank you for confirming my thoughts,
He does have intentions of paying back every penny , I just do not agree with spending the full amount on a car when he could get a slightly cheaper car and pay back my gran , I have said if he does get a car and doesn't pay her back then I wont be seen dead in it as I have a conscience and would feel uncomfortable taking part in his selfishness

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royalyfedup · 10/05/2017 20:43

LilacSpatula , I have said this to him but he's family are not as close as mine and so it's always our family that help us in times of need, he gets on extremely well with my side , even more reason not to rock the boat or cause any bad feeling . I think my gran would be very hurt if he done this

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Pinkheart5917 · 10/05/2017 20:44

Paying Gran back should be the priority here!

Gran done a nice thing lending you the money and the least she deserves is being paid back as agreed.

Him driving round in a new car while owing Gran money is wrong.

harderandharder2breathe · 10/05/2017 21:27

Yanbu

Paying your gran back should be the priority

royalyfedup · 11/05/2017 16:01

UPDATE , gran is getting her money back as originally agreed, and dh is getting a cheaper car .
It would seem he came to his senses and was maybe a little too excited to begin with

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