Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To write the twat a cheque

15 replies

Welshmaenad · 06/05/2017 23:19

Sorry, this will be long in an attempt not to dripfeed but I am absolutely bouncing.

My DM died three years ago and my DF last August. DM was one of four, and I have been NC with her youngest brother, Twatty Uncle (TU) for over ten years when he raised his fist to punch me during a disagreement over the care of my grandfather, who I was living with to care for at the time. My DM and DF backed me and also went NC when he displayed no remorse. He did not contact my DM when he knew she had terminal cancer because he is a self absorbed heartless bastard. My DS (younger sister) remained in limited contact with him for a time but hasn't bothered with him for years really, after his true colours were displayed time and again.

My DGF owned land that passed to the 4 siblings when he died, mum's 1/4 passed to DF and to my DS and I jointly after his death. For years it has been rented out as grazing land, managed by DM, but after DMs death the family who rented it were really crappy with paying and DF was grieving and ill and nobody was really bothered about chasing it up as it was a pittance really (£40 PCM) and it was better to have it occupied to deter squatting.

My DS has confessed this afternoon that within weeks of DFs death, TU started harassing her by phone asking where his share of the rent for the past three years was (I've no idea what was happening with it when my DM was alive, I never asked, but I think it might have been distributed via our aunt. Tbh following mum's death and with DF really unwell and in and out of hospital I didn't give it much thought). DS told him repeatedly that rent hadn't been paid for ages and he got really shitty with her, leaving her in tears after each call. She eventually called our aunt, who does speak to him, who assured her that she and the other sibling were not bothered and she would deal with TU. DS then had another call asking for historical copies of the grazing agreement (which we did find when we cleared and sold DFs house last month but are yet to send) as he is 'taking over' managing the land. She rang DA in tears again as he was so rude to her and she hasn't heard from him since.

Bearing in mind he timed this repeated harassment for a night he was aware her DH would be out, started on her literally weeks after our dad died, and has never expressed any sympathy for the loss of our parents or shown any emotion that his sister died of cancer aged 61 because he is a heartless bastard. Also bearing in mind my sister is quite sensitive (as well he knows) and I'm very very protective of her.

She's only just told me this as she was worried I would drive to England and throttle the cuntweasel for upsetting her, which is still quite tempting. However I'm beyond raging that he is accusing my dad of 'squirrelling away [TU's] money' when in fact he wasn't receiving any.

WIBU to calculate £10 pcm X no of months since my mother died and send him a cheque with the terse advice that if he feels so hard done by, he can consider this full reparation of the rent he's missed out on, to never contact my poor DS again, and provide bank details where he can deposit our £10 pcm share of the rent going forward as he's now presumably actually receiving some in his 'management' role? And also to fuck off and die the heartless arsewipe?

OP posts:
ijustwannadance · 06/05/2017 23:24

Tell him to fuck off. Would you all consider selling the land if it isn't that profitable?

ExplodedCloud · 06/05/2017 23:27

I was going to be all sensible and grown up but yes, you should but change arsewipe for cuntweasel.

ExplodedCloud · 06/05/2017 23:28

And Flowers for you and your dsis's losses :(

Catzpyjamas · 06/05/2017 23:31

Do it then CANCEL THE CHEQUE! What a twat.
Flowers for you and your DSis. As if you've not had enough to deal with.

Welshmaenad · 06/05/2017 23:35

wannadance all parties would need to be in agreement to sell. We are hoping to pursue planning permission in the next round of the local development plan and if achieved the land would be very valuable indeed so we're all playing the long game. Obviously he'd be on board with getting the maximum return because if he's this grabby over £10 a month....

Luckily DA will play go between because if he comes within 100 feet of me I'd be up on assault charges and risking my job (which is why DS kept it from me for so long bless her).

OP posts:
ijustwannadance · 06/05/2017 23:47

I'd set up a standing order for £2.50 a week just to pisss him off. Tell him straight that there has been no income so you will no be backpaying him anything.

PyongyangKipperbang · 06/05/2017 23:55

Dont pay him a penny because you can bet your life he wont pay you your share if/when he gets any out of the cheeky fuckers who are using the land.

Welshmaenad · 07/05/2017 00:09

Sorry, just for clarity, he hasn't been in contact for a while so has stopped asking.

However it's more the fact that he clearly thinks my lovely lovely dad has stolen from him, and is presumably telling people this. This really bothers me. I know my dad doesn't care because he's dead, and actually wouldn't care a jot if he was still alive because he thought TU was a pathetic dickmunch (note how he wasn't brave enough to contact the big burly ex copper once in three years asking for his share, but the minute DF died was all over a recently bereaved 28 year old woman like a syphilitic rash Hmm). But yeah. I'm bothered by the besmirching even whilst I know it's bollocks, and sending the money would make ME feel like we don't owe him a bastard thing.

OP posts:
GabsAlot · 07/05/2017 00:21

fuck him u know the truth

all over 40 quid a month?

Flopjustwantscoffee · 07/05/2017 00:24

If it helps though, people who know twatty uncle will know twatty uncle is a twat, so any ranting by him out being hard done by will likely be registered as just him being a twat again.

PigletJohn · 07/05/2017 00:40

your DS needs to block his phone no.

Modern cordless phones will do it, or set the ring tone to "silent" but if on BT, there is a free number blacklist facility (sends to spam voicemail) called "BT Call Protect" (very easy to use)

Other phone co's may have something similar

TheABC · 07/05/2017 08:42

YABVVVU.
Twatty Uncle is not worth the price of the postage stamp.

I am sorry for your loss and the fact you still have legal connections to such an odious individual.

emmyrose2000 · 07/05/2017 08:48

I wouldn't give uncle a single penny. He's an arsewipe.

youarenotkiddingme · 07/05/2017 09:01

I wouldn't give a penny either. You are all only entitled to a share of profits. There hasn't been any.

If TU starts to make a profit from the land then he has to share that equally between the beneficiaries.

Welshmaenad · 07/05/2017 12:02

Thank you all. I guess I should leave it. I'm still simmering though. What a fucknugget Angry

I'm not going to ask him for money. I don't really give a shit about £5 a month if I'm honest, certainly not enough to force myself to be in contact with him beyond a gesture of "fuck you". He can keep my share, and DS', if it means so bloody much to him, and glad welcome.

If he contacts her again I may go full tilt raving bitch on his ass though. I've made her promise to tell me if he does.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.