AIBU to still charge her

[Shezza71]

also posted in childcare, but more traffic here
I am a nanny to a little girl 4.5 one day a week

My 2 DDs, 16 & 19 do a lot of the extra babysitting that is often requested.

Last week boss asked if someone could do 8pm-2am this Saturday(tomorrow) DD19 said she would, but I told boss that dd would be booking the day off work, DD works at local cinema, so would still have to pay her if she cancelled, she is notorious for cancelling and changing times last minute.
She then said she would confirm asap. Finallyon Wednesday said she wouldn't need her for those times. Could she do 12-4.30pm instead, DD said yes, boss confirmed those times again yesterday evening.

Today boss also asked for Saturday next week, 1-9pm. My 2 DDs said they'd do it between them.
Boss gets home tonight at 7pm. I tell her next week is fine and that dd19 will see her tomorrow. She then says "oh, I don't need her tomorrow now!"
DD is really annoyed as she booked the day off and has now lost money.

I've told boss she needs to pay for hours booked, she doesn't thinK she has too as she changed the hours from what she'doriginally asked for when I had said a cancellation would need to be paid.
AIBU to say she has to pay something??

She should pay.
She needs to understand that if she has someone commit their time, they will expect to be paid.

Your boss is being awful. Poor DD!

Ah so she thought she could "move" the hours to next week and then no doubt she'd cancel that nearer the time too... she's a cheeky bitch and if she doesn't pay you should tell her your girls won't be babysitting any more

She obviously wants her money's worth and is now saying maybe DD could come later, she has made plans for the evening though as was booked for the afternoon. DD has said she would accept half of what she would be due as that is what she would of got from her normal job. Boss has stopped replying now 🤔

Your boss should pay her - she sounds terrible.

Well, it's going to be mighty inconvenient for your boss not to have this reliable and known babysitting any more isn't it!

And when she realises she can't do without, then it'll be on your daughters' terms - money upfront and in advance (perhaps on a timescale to co-ordinate with the cinema rota).

if she finds some other sucker, then your girls have dodged a bullet.

I'd stop doing the extra babysitting if she's so unreliable

I used to be that sucker lol. Hate being in the house though and girls need the money more than I do.

ShotsFired problem with cinema rota is she could get any days/times as her availability is 7 days a week. And shifts are from 8am til cinema is closed and cleaned at around 4am

So in order to babysit she has to take herself off the rota for that day or request a specific shift which she might not get

She sounds awful and yes she should pay.

Drop the extra babysitting! Just say you're not available. She's flakey as hell. Charge her this time, though.

Yes she should, good luck but it won't be easy.

Why is DD cancelling her work for babysitting though? I'd have thought it would work better to be up for all shifts offered at the cinema and only take babysitting in the gaps.

Of course she should pay her.

And if she doesn't, graciously, then you should make it clear that no more extra babysitting hours will be on offer.

She knew perfectly well that to do those times your daughter would have to cancel her cinema shift, so clearly she should pay. I would hope that when she realises she could be losing her babysitters (and nanny?) she'll decide to cough up.

She should pay. Your DD should either not be available in future or do what I do to flaky customers who don't pay up on time - charge them a 20% premium for the inconvenience.

If she doesnt pay then your kids are no longer available to babysit for her. She is mucking them about and losing them money. Thats not fair. She thinks because you nanny for her the whole family is at her beck and call as you wouldnt want to upset her. Time she woke up.

Next time tell her to get a babysitter through an agency and let her try and get out of paying them!

She knows perfectly well she should pay hte full cost, but she's wriggling and hoping if she ignores you you'll give it up. Threaten her with Small Claims Court (and take her off your books asap).

She gets paid double for babysitting than at the cinema and had an unexpected cash crisis so the cash while waiting for pay day was going to be very useful

Your DD should commit to the cinema and only babysit when it's genuinely convenient for her to do so

Willow2017 I have no qualms about upsetting her as she does think we are at her beck and call. I've told her no to extra hours on weekends and bank holidays several times over the last few weeks

Shezza
I meant that she probably thinks you wont want to upset her.

Tell her again and stick to it. She agreed to pay and has gone back on her word. I wouldnt trust her ever again. Why should your dd let her away with it then work for her again. I know its hard if you need money if she does go again I would charge her double next time, upfront

Is there a demand for nannies where you are OP? I'd be tempted to look elsewhere.

That is extraordinary one of the last people I would want to upset would be the person/people looking after my children.

She should definitely pay - it's totally irrelevant that the hours changed. What a skinflint suggesting that the first terms mentioned wouldn't transfer to the amended hours.
Your DD relied on the plan and acted to her detriment (gave up shift at cinema) to accommodate it. You mentioned that DD is paid less at the cinema - what about asking for payment equivalent to what she'd have got at cinema just on this occasion as a compromise?
From here, you have the following options:
I think no further babysitting until above is sorted out, whichever you pick:

1. She must pay in advance for arrangements where it means DD or you giving up other work (in these days of banking apps this should be easy), and DDs do not cancel any other plans until money hits their account - which is usually instant nowadays.
2. You get terms written down and signed by all specifying that if she proposes babysitting times, upon acceptance by DD, these times become payable whether or not they go ahead unless she gives xx (e.g. 60 hours) notice of cancellation. I think this is best option.
3. Drop her.

Good luck in sorting this out. It leaves a sour taste, doesn't it?

Thanks all. She has agreed to pay what DD lost at cinema. Still waiting to see it in the bank though.
Incywincy you'd be surprised at how badly some people treat their nannies
I do have other families I work for who are lovely. I've looked after this little girl for nearly 4 years now so very attached as she's gorgeous. And with a recently absent father I'm trying to put up with her mother rather than be another person leaving
Will make sure I have rules in place for the future though