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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think the govt should do more to help/support single people?

342 replies

windygallows · 01/05/2017 20:17

Increasingly I've become more aware of how how single people really struggle in a society geared towards couples. Not only is it pretty hard to get by financially or even to afford a house as a house as a single person, but aside from a small council tax rebate there is absolutely no tax relief or support given by the government. One person paying all bills in a system which 'assumes' and sets couple-dom as the standard.

Surely the govt could intervene by, for instance, setting a different/reduced tax code for those who are single than those in domestic partnerships/couples. Being single is usually out of people's control, often down to fate, and shouldn't be penalized.

I've been single for the majority of my life and vividly recall how much better off I was in the 10 years I was with ex-DP; it was a marked difference. I've seen accomplished, but solo, friends struggle. I certainly don't want to hope and pray that my DCs meet someone just to ensure they have a good quality of life and, as a society, it sends a pretty rubbish message that being independent means that you're likely to have a reduced standard of income.

OP posts:
user1493022461 · 03/05/2017 09:03

But backforgood my argument is hat if the govt can confidently identify single mothers then surely single non mothers as well?

The help for single mothers is for the CHILD, not the adult.

Help for non disabled single childfree adults? The one group most able to look after themselves? What next, a support group for middle aged middle class white men in upper management?

Orlantina · 03/05/2017 09:05

I am assuming most of the poor single people on here complaining are unpleasant to be around hence why they feel hard done by

Do you think that in a modern rich economy such as ours that single people should be able to earn enough to rent their own flat and all the costs associated with that when paid the median income?

user1493022461 · 03/05/2017 09:09

Not in London.

ShatnersWig · 03/05/2017 09:10

TrueBlue You may not need to be in a couple but you've proved the point that being single is more expensive than not being single. Singly, you couldn't afford to buy these holiday homes, you needed several other people to cover the cost.

GoatsFeet · 03/05/2017 09:13

I am assuming most of the poor single people on here complaining are unpleasant to be around hence why they feel hard done by.

So this ^ reveals quite a lot about a poster.

TrueBlueYorkshire · 03/05/2017 09:18

Orlantina, Not if there is a shortage of flats. That is how economics work, you are constantly in competition for a piece of the pie.

TrueBlueYorkshire · 03/05/2017 09:21

Sorry GoatsFeet, it just felt like the single people complaining that they are hard done by was a bit of a troll, so thought i would play a bit of devils advocate (e.g. I am white, single, rich, male, what has the world ever done for me type attitude).

Starduke · 03/05/2017 09:22

I don't really understand this argument.

You say that a single person has to pay more for bills, rent etc. than if they were a couple. But also you get more - you get a whole flat/house to yourself. You don't have to share a bed, a bathroom etc. You don't have to compromise on what's for dinner, what's on TV etc. You have to compromise on where you live so it's convenient for two people, not just one person. (DH and I work at opposite ends of a capital city)

If you want to pay less than there are possibilities (like houseshare/a smaller flat).

Orlantina · 03/05/2017 09:23

Not if there is a shortage of flats. That is how economics work, you are constantly in competition for a piece of the pie

Thanks for explaining that to me Hmm
The thing is - single people on a median wage do struggle in this country to find a place to live and to pay the bills.

And that's a median wage - God knows how people on much lower incomes survive.

Single people seem to have been forgotten in the planning and economic system. Yet there are lots and lots of people living alone.

Orlantina · 03/05/2017 09:25

If you want to pay less than there are possibilities (like houseshare/a smaller flat

Cheapest flat in my city is £120,000. Median salary is £20,000.

How does a single person come close to buying when the cheapest flat is 6 times the median salary?

(And the rent is £600 - £700 per month)

Orlantina · 03/05/2017 09:26

Not in London

As you get out of London, the flats get cheaper but so does the pay.

brasty · 03/05/2017 09:27

Single people have more risk. DP and I both work. When DP was made redundant, we still had my salary coming in. Single friend who was made redundant was only entitled to about £70 a week unemployment benefit. It is far easier financially as a couple. It spreads the financial risk, and it is cheaper living as a couple.

Starduke · 03/05/2017 09:28

But just because single people can't buy a flat (like lots of couples) is no reason to subsidise them from the government.

Orlantina · 03/05/2017 09:29

In the future, this will be a massive issue. People living longer, many couples separating, people who have always lived alone. Where will people live? What if people are ill?

This has massive implications for society.

brasty · 03/05/2017 09:29

And I agree that single people get totally forgotten when planning housing. There are lots of purpose built student flats. But unless you are very well off, there is no housing aimed at single people.

Orlantina · 03/05/2017 09:31

But just because single people can't buy a flat (like lots of couples) is no reason to subsidise them from the government

I agree - I think it says a lot about how expensive it is to live in our society. It's so expensive that there are people who need subsidies to get by. What effect do these subsidies have on the rest of the people who don't get these subsidies?

brasty · 03/05/2017 09:31

starduke it is not about subsidising. My City has encouraged developers to build housing especially for students. It is not subsidised, but meets a clear need. No one does the same for single people.

Starduke · 03/05/2017 09:32

I agree there are benefits to living as a couple (and downsides of course). But I don't understand why it's the government's business to subsidise single people?

This thread is focusing on all the negative things, but not the positive things. So for example with the single occupency room - what about the fact that you can choose to go on holiday wherever you want - no compromise with a partner. You can also go when it suits you/your work best, no negociation with a partner to find a week off that is convenient to both of you. Less chance of holiday leave being cancelled. etc.

brasty · 03/05/2017 09:34

The Government needs to start thinking about single people in its planning. Up till now the assumption has been that people are single when they are young, and when they are very old. And Governments plan for that. But that does not reflect the reality. More and more people are single, and if the Government does not take into account this trend in its planning, it will bite them at some point.

Orlantina · 03/05/2017 09:36

But I don't understand why it's the government's business to subsidise single people

I think that Government should develop POLICIES that recognise the growth in people living alone - and guide businesses to help them. Such as the development in cheaper accommodation.

But the reality is - we live in an expensive country. That's why the Government needs to pay benefits to people who can't afford to live off their income if they have children.

ShatnersWig · 03/05/2017 09:42

Starduke As a single person, I can't just choose to go on holiday wherever or whenever I want. I still have work to consider and they decide when I can have time off (often I can't have when I'd like to have off because priority is given to those with children). There are lots of places I'd like to go but can't afford to, because of single supplements which are often twice what each person in a couple would pay!

You ask why it's the government's business to subsidise single people? I, in reply, ask why it's the government's business to subsidise married couples with a married couple's tax allowance? Doesn't matter how small it may be, they do it.

user1493022461 · 03/05/2017 09:51

in reply, ask why it's the government's business to subsidise married couples with a married couple's tax allowance?

They want to encourage marriage which in return reduces the burden on the state. It's not to be nice, it's for a sensible financial reason.
For what sensible financial reason should they subsidise fully able single people?

BoyFromTheBigBadCity · 03/05/2017 09:53

Oh I hate the 'you can go on holiday whenever you want'. I'm so many places I've worked if you're single or don't have children you are the bottom of the pile for all annual leave.

Also, Starsuke, saying you get the whole flat/house? The LHA means that if you are on low income and under 35 you will get minimal help to live in a room in a houseshare. None of my single friends can afford to live alone. Also why shouldn't single people live in London?

BoyFromTheBigBadCity · 03/05/2017 09:54

Sorry, Starduke, poor phone typing there.

ShatnersWig · 03/05/2017 09:55

Which proves the argument others were proposing therefore which others refused to see, that it is more expensive to be single!