Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

£50 weekly shop!!!!

97 replies

user98765797837 · 01/05/2017 15:59

Back story.... I'm a sahm, hubby works, 2 kids and a cat.

I do online shopping as I don't drive and hubby refuses to go to the supermarket on his days off. So I did our usual weekly shop this morning, asked for his bank card and was asked how much it was,I said £50 and was greeted with "WHY is it so much?"

AIBU in thinking £50 isn't that much to feed 2 adults, 2 children and a cat, (It includes packed lunches for hubby and child)

OP posts:
Original poster
user98765797837 · 01/05/2017 16:11

I have a bank card but currently bank is empty after clubs at the weekend,.... I can go on online banking and transfer money into family account but as he was home I thought it was easier to just ask for his card to pay....

Its only so cheap because we got child benefit last week and did a big shop so still have washing powder, mince and sausages in freezer and a big bag of potatoes....otherwise it would have been more.

OP posts:
Pinkheart5917 · 01/05/2017 16:12

Yanbu at all!

£50 a week for 2 adults, 2 dc and a cat sounds as low as it could be. To be honest we spend more than that your dh would have a heart attack if he saw our shop.

When did your dh last look at the prices of things? Actually go in to a shop?

BarbaraofSeville · 01/05/2017 16:13

£50 a week is well below average for a family of 4 and a lot less than you would be allowed if you were on a debt management (ie frugal living) programme.

Show him the list and ask where he thinks you should cut down, which will be very hard as there isn't much flexibility in that budget - you must already be buying own brand/value and little meat, cheap things?

Be wary if he says he can do it for less. He'll go/shop online spend £30/40 or whatever, but 'forget' to buy half the things you need.

SecretNetter · 01/05/2017 16:18

Random comment for him to make, assuming this (doing shopping) is a regular occurrence.

Has it just gone up? Or did you spend a lot more last week so he assumed it would last?

FrenchMartiniTime · 01/05/2017 16:19

There is only me and my OH in the house and we can easily spend between £60-£70 on a food shop Blush

So I think £50 for 2 adults, 2 DC and a cat is amazing! What's your secret?

MovingtoParadise · 01/05/2017 16:19

Ours is over twice that for 2 of us.

I'd say 'you're quite right darling, go through the online shop and delete things we don't need. If we do end up needing them then you will have to go to the shop in the evening'.

Pigface1 · 01/05/2017 16:20

This afternoon I spent £55 on a week's food for me and DH. And we're eating out tomorrow night. I think £50 to feed a family your size is amazing!!!

thinkbarcelona · 01/05/2017 16:20

How did you manage that?
I spend about £120 (2 adults, 2 kids)

AnnieOH1 · 01/05/2017 16:21

Did you possibly spend more on your big shop than normal? Is it possible he thought the £££s spent last week meant this week would be pennies?

I would have a serious talk with him about it to be honest.

Ampersand1 · 01/05/2017 16:22

Spend 3 times that -I child at home and very large cat

annandale · 01/05/2017 16:24

The only possible response is to say 'Sorry? Didn't catch that - did you say 'how do you manage to buy so much for so little'? Well, takes practice,' and walk away.

Or ask him if he is suddenly newly stressed about money. That's the only other thing I can think of.

ememem84 · 01/05/2017 16:25

£50 is good. We went this morning and spent £70 and only bought what we needed for meal plan this week. Admittedly some things were on offer and we bought more (loo roll kitchen paper etc) and a lot of cleaning stuff.

ChunkyHare · 01/05/2017 16:26

I had this comment once from Dh over school shoes for Ds1.

He couldn't believe they cost £48. Err your son is now an adult size 8 with a wide foot meaning we have to shop at Clarks.

qumquat · 01/05/2017 16:26

I spend £50 on just me and DD.

teraculum29 · 01/05/2017 16:27

I don't know from which planet your husband is....
Certainly he didn't do shopping for ages...
Just been in Tesco this morning, to do topping up shopping between deliveries, spent £50 (thats 2adults, child and cat).

Original poster
user98765797837 · 01/05/2017 16:28

We had some coupons for the past few weeks...tesco gave us £8 off our shop so its been less for the last few weeks, and most weeks I just transfer between the accounts and he doesnt really take much notice. But as I said earlier as he's home for bank hol I thought it was easier to just use his card than faff around transferring. Anyway I may have slammed the comp shut without checking out and said i wasnt going to do it now.... He'll complain later when I say he needs to go buy milk and packed lunch stuff from the co-op.

secret.... i buy a chicken and it lasts 2-3 meals. lots of rice and pasta, frozen veg is cheaper and lasts longer, value veg is just as good as other veg just a little smaller/broken or wonky. I dont really know how i do it but the kids eat plenty of fruit and veg and dont go hungry.
Loose bananas are cheaper than packaged ones... tesco you can get 15 bananas for under £2!!!
Though this week we dont need: washing powder, potatoes, mince meat, sausages, any toiletries or cleaning stuff, cat meat (she just needs biscuits this week)...

OP posts:
unlimiteddilutingjuice · 01/05/2017 16:29

We spend much more than that. I think you are really good at managing money.
Its likely he just doesn't know what things cost.
Ask him to do it or just ignore

SemiNormal · 01/05/2017 16:33

I spend £50 on just me and DD.- Same for just me and my DS. (Oh and our hamster which costs next to nothing tbf)

Justaboy · 01/05/2017 16:33

You really oughta frogmarch him down to lets say Waitrose and see how far 50 quid goes;!

ProfessorBranestawm · 01/05/2017 16:34

Sounds like he's out of touch TBH. It's not even the amount you've spent it's his attitude. Refusing to go to the shop on his day off? Too good for it is he? Hmm

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 01/05/2017 16:35

I spend £60 at Lidl every week on me and DD.

Trifleorbust · 01/05/2017 16:36

I would write a list of what you need and tell him he is welcome to go and see how little he can get it for.

BarbaraofSeville · 01/05/2017 16:37

Or instead of shopping at Tesco, which can be quite expensive, tell him he needs to go to Lidl or Aldi.

They're usually open until 10 pm so unless he has one of those jobs that requires all waking hours to be spent at work, he can go in the evening (or first thing in the morning if he works shifts) so he doesn't even need to trouble himself on his day off.

CottonSock · 01/05/2017 16:37

Double that at least

5moreminutes · 01/05/2017 16:46

So user are you going to challenge him to do it for less?

Make sure he knows which essentials are not on the list or he'll smugly do it for 49.50 and expect you never to go over that, ever... Angry

My DH was a bit the same at one point when I was a sahm - we set up a shopping account which I thought was a good idea as I found being questioned about spending very annoying and humiliating, but then he kept saying ideally we'd spend even less on shopping etc. I exploded one day when he casually told me he'd spent a large sum on a luxury after I got home from an Aldi shop I'd added up as I went around and found myself wondering whether to spend my last few € for the month on adding bananas to the trolley or whether to save them for toddlers group subs! It brought home how ridiculous it was to be food shopping as though we were on a very low income whilst other spending was so out of proportion and casual!

Make sure you set him straight otherwise it can be a slippery slope.

I still shop mostly at Aldi and in the first week of each month I do two big Aldi shops each of about €170 (in Aldi that is a trolley filled to the rafters, stock up our big stand alone freezer and also long life dry goods like pasta and anything tinned or in jars, cereal etc. at the start of the month), then after that spend about €100 per week, sometimes more. Family of 5, children all school age, no pets.

Swipe left for the next trending thread