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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To really not appreciate this sort of "humour"?

76 replies

Soyamilkisniceintea · 29/04/2017 12:32

I know a few people who do it - not know well but it seems to be a type of person.

You ask for something to be polite but it's perfectly reasonable - 'could I have a carrier bag please?'
They look at you poker faced and say 'no.'
You wait.
They break out into a grin and say 'course!'

I know it's meant harmlessly but I hate it. I feel like such a twat as I stand there waiting for the 'punch.' AIBU to wonder why the fuck people do it as it isn't funny!

OP posts:
Gwenci · 29/04/2017 14:47

I just do not get this humour. And why do people keep on doing it? Has anyone ever in the history of mankind laughed at these 'hilarious' exchanges?

Though it happened to me in France so maybe it really is hilarious anywhere. I have the most basic tourist French and I hate using it, I get so flustered and self-conscious. So it took me an age to pluck up the courage to ask the man behind the counter for two tickets from the train station to the airport in my faltering French.

He stared at me and replied in English - 'the airport is closed' Then continued the stare before laughing and saying 'not really!!'

Twat.

soapboxqueen · 29/04/2017 14:51

Doesn't bother me at all. Everyone does things that annoy/upset other people. I know I must annoy other people as they annoy me. I don't expect people to go out of their way to be malicious but for the most part I think it's just something people do.

MrsJayy · 29/04/2017 14:55

It is just embaressing (sp) guy at the corner shop does it he thinks is hilarious its really not, i also hate pranks or prank programmes i can feel myself blush for the poor buggers

Oldraver · 29/04/2017 14:55

Someone did this to OH in Morrisons. Asked in your normal polite way if he could have some ham and she said "no, you cant".

We stood there just gobsmacked for a moment, then OH muttered something along the lines of "well bugger you", then stomped off. And yes lots of ..."well, if you cant take a joke".

It was one of those really odd surreal occasions where you cant believe some actually said that.

RebelRogue · 29/04/2017 14:57

I come at this from the other side. I rarely say no to things,but when i do i mean it. And some people just think it's a joke,looking at me expectantly with a smile on their face followed by "no,seriously/really now" and the shocked faces when they realise that no,I won't do whatever.

MrsJayy · 29/04/2017 14:59

Some twat did that to me in france i asked for stuff in tourist french he stared at me i asked asked again he answered me in and English accent Arsehole

Spadequeen · 29/04/2017 15:03

I have to say it usually doesn't bother me, but that time at the doctors it was awful, I was obviously in a lot of distress and was by myself (dh parking the car). Anyway was all sorted and hopefully he won't do that to anyone else.

ChickenVindaloo2 · 29/04/2017 15:13

Hahha!

I came up the communal stairs the other day and found a builder from working next door having a fag out the stair window. I asked him, poker-faced, if he had "a smoking permit"? He stuttered "no"...then I broke out in a laugh - so did he - we are good pals now!

TheExuberant1 · 29/04/2017 15:16

I just look at them stoney faced back. Usually makes them feel a cunt.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 29/04/2017 15:28

The only time I was ever tempted to 'joke' like this was when I worked in a shop with the name of said shop emblazoned all over my uniform t-shirt.
I was asked "Do you work here?" on many occasions and it was oh so tempting to answer with a very sarcastic "Noooo…"
I never actually did though.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 29/04/2017 15:28

The only time I was ever tempted to 'joke' like this was when I worked in a shop with the name of said shop emblazoned all over my uniform t-shirt.
I was asked "Do you work here?" on many occasions and it was oh so tempting to answer with a very sarcastic "Noooo…"
I never actually did though.

AnotherQuoll · 29/04/2017 15:34

It's a bit passive-aggressive isn't it? I also get the sense that it's taking the piss out of people's manners. (I don't think I've ever seen it done to a person who wasn't being polite and saying "please") Not sure what that's about.

WashingMatilda · 29/04/2017 15:40

Clawdy that's fucking awful.

ForalltheSaints · 29/04/2017 15:49

Amongst friends maybe. Not in a shop or other professional capacity.

burdog · 29/04/2017 15:52

Ugh, my brother and his GF do the thing where they'll say things are blatantly untrue. They once thought it'd be funny to try to convince me that some wooden sculptures in a childrens' park (think snails, frogs, etc) were original Viking sculptures. I didn't want to give them a rise so I just stared quizically at the things and gave a flat 'uh-huh'. Cue pissing themselves. I was humouring you, idiots.

Pigface1 · 29/04/2017 15:52

It's a typical sad middle-aged man thing - they think it's 'the banter' - but it makes having a normal conversation SO annoying. I used to try and laugh politely but now I just stay stoney-faced.

I stayed in a B&B a few weeks ago that was owned by a man who did this. Arrived, knocked on the door, he opened it and says 'not today thank you!', and then shuts the door - then opened it again going 'just joking!' Oh, very amusing, but I'm knackered, desperate for the loo and genuinely not quite sure I've got the right place, so I'm not overwhelmed by your wit. Later he gave me a breakfast menu and I asked for porridge - 'we haven't got any porridge.... only joking!' Good one...

Sallygoroundthemoon · 29/04/2017 16:05

It's nasty and cruel. My ex used to do this and when I got upset would say 'I'm only joking, you're being over sensitive'. It was a former of control and bullying. I won't take it now from anyone.

honeylulu · 29/04/2017 16:08

I hate this.
I suspect I am mildly autistic (my eldest is in the assessment process at the moment) and one of my biggest social "issues" is struggling to grasp what people are saying to me - not in words but in intonation. I have to pause and try and grasp if they are joking/sarcastic/blunt etc. So this sort of "humour" is not only unfunny to me but also intimidating.

Oldraver · 30/04/2017 15:31

Pigface I would of been so tempted when it came to paying to refuse for a while...

limitedperiodonly · 30/04/2017 15:37

I know someone who does this kind of thing all the time. He thinks he is hilarious. Apparently so does his wife. They are wrong. It's not a big deal. It is tedious though.

I think most of MN read the Daily Mail. But they think it doesn't count if they just read it online.

ThreeLeggedHaggis · 30/04/2017 15:45

I really don't recognise this kind of humour and, reading the replies, that makes me very lucky! It doesn't sound at all funny.

MarklahMarklah · 30/04/2017 15:48

I've only done this with people that I know would find it funny, and I'm going back some 12 or so years to a particular job I had.

People (internal) would phone up late on a Friday when everyone is tired and wants to go home but the work has to be done and be surprised when I answered the line. They'd say things like, "Oh, are you still here?" which to my mind is a rather stupid question, so I'd say, "No. This is a recorded message."
Equally if people came past my desk also late on Friday, and say the same: "Oh, I thought you'd have gone home."
"Yes I have. This is a hologram."

TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain · 30/04/2017 15:54

My brother have a name for this kind of "humour": Unfunny Uncle Syndrome.

PrivatePike · 30/04/2017 15:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hidingtonothing · 30/04/2017 16:03

Ugh, my stepdad does this and I hate it. He dresses it up as crap humour but I do think it's about power, he's the type who loves to feel he's 'won' or managed to score a point or two. As an adult I can see him for what he is, a small and inadequate excuse for a man, but as a child I just found it frustrating and baffling. I don't respond to it now, I speak to him as little as possible and consciously avoid asking him for anything if I can possibly avoid it. I'm not sure anyone's ever done it to me in a shop or anything but suspect I would walk away at 'no' if they did, I don't have the time or patience for bullshit these days.

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