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AIBU?

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Original poster

Are Mongolian blue spots an unknown thing?

238 replies

Mrsknackered · 28/04/2017 11:52

Both of my DS's have Mongolian blue birthmarks. DS1 has a completely blue bottom and DS2 has a blue bum cheek and at the top of his spine, a circular blue spot the size of a 2p.
They are noted down in their red books.
At swimming last night, a lady was sitting near us in the shallow end and kept giving me a funny look. She then said, 'think you've been holding wee man a bit tightly!' So I was like 'sorry, what?' And she pointed at his back and said 'that's a nasty bruise for such a young bubba!' (DS2 is 5 months)
I got really embarrassed as I can be a bit wimpy and awkward and explained it's a birth mark but she just kinda 'mmm'ed me!
I felt awkward after and wondered if others had noticed it too and also thought he was bruised :(
Are they not a known about? Should I be making nurseries/schools aware of their birthmarks?

Second AIBU of the week! What's happening to me Hmm

OP posts:
SparklyUnicornPoo · 30/04/2017 16:41

I work in a school. I've just had to google because I'd never heard of them and yes, looking a the pictures on google I would have assumed it was a bad bruise, so might be worth mentioning to his new school just in case.

user1492728351 · 30/04/2017 16:42

@MsKnackered Please don't worry about telling people, people can be ignorant if they don't recognise something, it has a name Mongolian blue spot, i actually had a girl in my class who had a partially blue eye (over the iris white part) which i though was amazing, and looked it up and found about Mongolian birth marks. You should advise Teachers, Nurseries Doc etc but besides that remember you don't owe any strangers any explanations, you know what it is and that's all that matters, if you do get someone rude you can tell them what it's called politely, then they can look it up there's no reason to be ignorant nowadays!

MrsPeelyWaly · 30/04/2017 16:47

I work in a school. I've just had to google because I'd never heard of them and yes, looking a the pictures on google I would have assumed it was a bad bruise, so might be worth mentioning to his new school just in case

I wouldn't be mentioning it to anyone. I'd wait until it was brought up and have a laugh when the bruise just didnt go away.

sadsquid · 30/04/2017 16:48

I'm white and I have heard of them, but only from reading the Dr. Stoppard medical handbook from cover to cover when I was a weird kid. I bet most of my friends would not recognise one.

StressheadMcGee · 30/04/2017 16:54

I had one on my bum when I was born, apparently mum was quite concerned when I was brought back to her from the nursery (or whatever it was called in the 80s) with what she thought was a bruise! It disappeared by the time I was about 6.

BeanyGodkin · 30/04/2017 16:54

My 15yo son has one on his leg the size of a 50p. When he was little his nursery school kept telling me he'd bruised himself, even though I'd told them and it was in his file Hmm
It's grown with him and is still there. I've always quite liked it. But they do look like a bruise

StressheadMcGee · 30/04/2017 16:55

I also have no idea where it comes from genetically as my ancestry is entirely Anglo Saxon as far as I know!

LadyPW · 30/04/2017 17:01

'there must be a touch of the tar brush in your family'
Leaving the Hmm aspect out of this for a moment - how could she even say that given they're blue? Surely a joke (I'm using the term loosely) about a one-night stand with an alien would have been more "accurate" if she was making insinuations? (disclaimer - autistic desire for logic kicking in)
Have to admit Mongolian blue spots are a revelation to me too...

JsOtherHalf · 30/04/2017 17:04

I've also known children with Polish parents to have them.

user1493035447 · 30/04/2017 17:10

You should have told her to fuck off or she'd see the back of your hand, see how that went down! What a cheek (no pun intended) giving you dirty looks like that.

RomanticWalksToTheFridge · 30/04/2017 17:13

I've heard of them because my best friend growing up was Hungarian and apparently it is very common there.

I have just googled the images though as realised I had never seen them- it must be quite scary to see one for the first time on your child as they do look like bruises!

DelphiniumBlue · 30/04/2017 17:14

I've seen babies of Mediterrenean and Jewish descent with Mongolian blue spots.

lizzieoak · 30/04/2017 17:14

I didn't know there was a name for it but have heard that First Nations babies in Canada often have them (& that they fade). Apparently babies were sometimes taken by social services who didn't know the marks were not bruises. But seizing FN kids used to be very common here - nothing for you to worry about!

Iwantamarshmallow · 30/04/2017 17:26

YANBU My dd scratches her cheeks when she's sucking her thumb and it leaves her skin quite broken and scarred. I've literally tried everything. The health visitor told me not to worry and keep it clean but we're constantly asked if she has chicken pox or some other illness and I have to explain she does It to herself and then put up with dirty looks or unwanted advice. It makes me so mad its none of people's business just tell them to do one.

Scrammymummy · 30/04/2017 17:44

Health visitors & GPs seem to have very sparse knowledge on birthmarks generally. My little girl was born with a haemangioma, aka a strawberry birthmark. Everyone said it was nothing, it wasn't even made a note of at her discharge checkup. But it grew & grew. And then it ulcerated, meaning it opened up, and was so unbelievably painful for her 😢 She was 11 weeks old. Luckily we were referred to GOSH, and they knew just what to do. She started on a beta blocker at 12 weeks (side effects of BBs in children with blood pressure issues showed a speedy reduction in strawberry marks), and we were shown how to dress the wound, she spent the next 4 months with bandages round her head (it's situated behind her ear). It was only then that I started to realise the lack of knowledge in the health profession about the possible implications, other mothers with the same issue had their GPs completely refusing to refer them, they were distraught. DD was on beta blockers for a year, and now has a scar where the ulceration was, but luckily for her it's hidden by her hair. I can remember feeling afraid that people would think we'd hurt her, so I hardly left the house with her until months after the bandages came off. Others I know have had people make some terrible comments, and children have been told they're ugly at nursery/school. Really wish there was more awareness! Sorry for the rant & hijacking the thread 😬

Illuminator · 30/04/2017 17:48

Interesting thread.

My DCs are mixed race (black/white) and one of them had an enormous Mongolian Blue Spot at birth. The midwife noted it in his rebook immediately and panicked me a bit by saying 'make sure you tell people what it is, as they are often mistaken for bruises'.

Another of my DCs has a 'cafe au lait' which is brown birthmark which looks a bit like a bruise, too.

I'm white and hadn't heard of either before having my DCs.

Illuminator · 30/04/2017 17:48

*red book

Illuminator · 30/04/2017 17:49

By the way, MBS faded by about a year old.

DeadGood · 30/04/2017 18:44

"'there must be a touch of the tar brush in your family'
Leaving the hmm aspect out of this for a moment - how could she even say that given they're blue? Surely a joke (I'm using the term loosely) about a one-night stand with an alien would have been more "accurate" if she was making insinuations?"

LadyPW you have misunderstood.

What the midwife meant was "this child is mixed race" - not that the birthmark itself was literally created with a tar brush.

AirandMungBeans · 30/04/2017 18:53

DS1, aged 5, extremely pale skinned and ginger, still has one. It's a large blue patch at the base of his spine. I've lost count of how many times I've been questioned about it. It's very prominent due to his skin tone. My younger sister also had one. As far as I know there is no mixed heritage in any of our families.

AGinForEachMakesThree · 30/04/2017 19:30

This has made me both sad and angry as I have been in a similar position. I had a blue bum until 3 or 4 and all three of my children have or did have blue bottoms!

LadyGlitterSparklesSeriously · 30/04/2017 19:46

My mixed-race DC all have them. DD2's entire bottom is bright blue!

mathanxiety · 30/04/2017 20:31

I think LadyPW thinks the marks are blue, not that they were created with a 'tar brush' [terrible phrase].

The colour of the marks depends on the surrounding skin tone. They come in various shades of grey or grey blue.

Beebopandrocksteady22 · 30/04/2017 20:33

My son will be 4 next week he has MBS, it covers his lower back and was something we knew nothing about. He also has a rather sizable strawberry shaped cafe au lait birthmark in the middle of his back too. His is yet to fade, but his my dh has it too. He is dark skinned and isn't overly noticeable.

I would definitely inform anybody that needs to know, play group/ schools etc, it's good to have it already in the notes kneaded it is ever queried

Beebopandrocksteady22 · 30/04/2017 20:35

His dad my dh*

Kneaded is completely unnecessary 😂

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