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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to wonder why she seems to hate me?

12 replies

toolonglurking · 26/04/2017 20:53

I take DS (1) to a weekly playgroup run by a local church. I've always been pretty smiley and friendly, will chat to anyone and try to listen and be attentive and a generally decent person. I've made quite good friends with everyone there, and really good friends with a few.
There is one woman there who seems to really have a problem with me though.
Whenever I bump into her (in the church foyer, getting coffee, sitting to sing songs to the kids etc) she completely blanks me but happily chats to everyone else.
She has recently become part of the team who run the playgroup and her apparent issue with me is becoming more and more obvious. Yesterday she was the one handing out instruments for the kids for a song and she pointedly bypassed me and DS and didn't give us one when everyone around us got one. Until then I thought I was imagining it, but she seemed so determined it couldn't have been anything else!

I realise this is ridiculous and utterly trivial, but it's really annoying me and I am finding it difficult not to let it upset me.

OP posts:
Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 26/04/2017 20:58

Sounds like she is envious of your social skills. . Your style? Gorgeous dc? Car?
Or she is just a bitch in general. . .

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 26/04/2017 20:59

There was a women like that in the play group I used to take dd to. You think its your imagination at first don't you. She just took a dislike to me. If she did ever speak to me. She thought she was giving me hell and all and that I should be most honoured.. The place was full of clique cunts tbh. However I still kept on going. My dd enjoyed going. Why should she miss out because of bunch of idiots.
They didn't add or take anything to or from my life.

elessar · 26/04/2017 21:00

You are not being unreasonable to wonder what her problem is but asking on here won't help - you should go up to her and ask directly if you've done something to annoy or upset her as you've noticed she's been blanking you.

Or just completely ignore her rude behaviour and act oblivious - say hello to her and make conversation, if she misses you out on anything then say cheerily 'oops you seem to have missed us out x, can we have an instrument please' - she'd have to be pretty shameless to continue ignoring you in those circumstances.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 26/04/2017 21:02

Hold on she deliberately left your ds out. She's gone beyond cuntingtoness.

Having problems with parents. Is one thing, but taking it out on children is another. I'd be having words I think.

Yayne · 26/04/2017 21:04

If you're brave, I'd ask her 'why are you blanking me and my child'. I've sometimes done this in the past and have found out about misunderstandings. Otherwise I'd just keep wondering about what I might or might not have done or feel like staying away, but I'd rather know if she's a cow or I really did something that wasn't great.

redexpat · 26/04/2017 21:05

My money is on either mistaken identity or there has been some untrue gossip that she has chosen to believe.

knackeredinyorkshire · 26/04/2017 21:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Teddy1970 · 26/04/2017 21:31

I had a similar fellow mother when my daughter was at nursery, she was so friendly and chatty with everyone else, but totally blanked me and I wasn't imagining it either, she'd drop her child off and was all smiles and chatty with everyone but when she saw me her face dropped and her demeanor changed, it was so blinking obvious it was awful...to this day I don't know what I did to offend the woman, I'd never even spoken to her!

NeverDidit · 26/04/2017 21:32

OP, you have to try and not let this bother you. Sometimes there are people thst just don't like you for no apparent reason. You can beat yourself up trying to work out why or you could just ignore it. If she is the type of person to blank you and your DS then she must be an unpleasant person.

Reow · 26/04/2017 21:33

Sounds like she's Queen Bee and you're encroaching on her turf.

She probably doesn't like that everyone else likes you if so. I've met a few of these buggers.

rainbowbreeze123 · 28/04/2017 16:44

Whatever her reason its not very christian is it Hmm

pilates · 28/04/2017 16:53

She sounds like she is jealous of you. Just kill her with kindness 😀
Did you say anything when she didn't hand you an instrument?

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