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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

night terrors

49 replies

ohdeaeyme · 21/04/2017 22:40

my 2 year old gets night terrors 2/3 times a night 4-5 nights a week.. often go on for up to 6 hours long.

this isnt an aibu but more of a please tell me these end for good? been going on for months and theu are awful. i know she doesmt recognise me.fully but its heart breaking your toddler seeing you anx runninf and hiding in fear whilst screaming so loud the neighbours can hear

OP posts:

MrsBobDylan · 22/04/2017 00:06

I have night terrors and occasionally I am aware of a feeling of absolute terror just as dh wakes me up. If he doesnt wake me I can end up across the room banging at the window and generally making a right noise and we don't want to frighten our kids.

Mostly I don't remember them but I think if a child is woken they are more likely to be aware of the feeling of terror if only for a couple of seconds.

I really, really hate the fact that I still have them. Most sensible folk seem to outgrow them tho, hope your dd does soon op!

mortificado · 22/04/2017 00:11

I suffered with them as a child and remember piriton being prescribed.
Probably because it knocked me out
But soon after it stopped crashing completely knocks on wood

mortificado · 22/04/2017 00:11

*happening

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower · 22/04/2017 00:12

No, I remember nightmares and they felt very different. Apparently I'd not wake a lot of the time and just scream. I do remember a couple of occasions where I woke and didn't know what was going on and felt very scared.

The terrors as an adult were different again, that's when I got the awake but paralysed thing.

Nodowntime · 22/04/2017 00:20

Didn't want to read and run, my daughter had them that often and for that long at 2 to 4, then rarer at 5. What helped to wipe them out completely almost immediately was homeopathy. You need a recommended homeopath who you could trust.

InsertUsernameHere · 22/04/2017 00:22

Like upthread we found what helped was bring DS out of his room and properly waking him up (gently). This would be lights on, and walking him about, taking him to the toilet. Also getting him to have a drink of water and as he was getting more awake - playing a game of catch. We found he had to be completely awake and then stay awake for half an hour or so (snuggles on the sofa watching a cartoon); otherwise he'd just go straight back in to the terror. We found they tended to happen if he was over tired (e.g. Night after beaver no sleepover.)

WorzelsCornyBrows · 22/04/2017 00:30

My 4yo DD gets night terrors, though not as often as yours and they have become less frequent as she's got older. We stay out of her way as contact makes her worse, but stay at a safe distance to make sure she doesn't hurt herself. Once it's over I give her a cuddle while she sleeps, but I think that's more for my benefit than hers. She has no recollection the next day.

It must be horrible to see it so frequently, maybe see a GP, but if they're otherwise happy and has no recollection, focus on making their sleeping area as safe as possible and see if it's somethIng they grow out of?

gobbin · 22/04/2017 00:38

DS had them regularly as a young child of about 3-5 which intensified just before starting school. He had another bout before starting high school. Nothing since.

CrazedZombie · 22/04/2017 00:39

6 hours? Poor you.

Ds (age 10) has had them since he was s baby. Much less frequent now but totally scary. For the couple of hours after his bedtime I still fear him having one.

My only consolation is that he has no memory of them.

Mrsknackered · 22/04/2017 00:43

I suffered from them so can't offer advice as much, but try and take comfort in that when they wake they have no memory of what has happened and are not distressed!
I grew out of mine by around 15. I haven't had one for many, many years now. From 2-12 my mum suffered horrendous nights.
My dad didn't understand or get it at all and once shook me and shouted at me in desperation.
My mum just sat, restrained (as best she could without hurting me) and comforted, sung familiar songs and would make sure I had water and a cuddle afterwards.
I can't say if that helped though, as ofcourse I don't remember.
My mum did note that when I was more tired than usual or had had a bad day at school for example, they were much worse.
Sorry you're going through this OP

Original poster

ohdeaeyme · 22/04/2017 05:38

they are just horrific. i cant get close enough to try the cool air thing.

i think she is avtually suffering a mix of night terrors and nightmares but she isnt talking yet to tell me :(

OP posts:

Mermaidbutmytailfelloff · 22/04/2017 13:34

I found a cold wet flannel on his face helped a lot, seemed cruel but it seemed to wake him best of everything, and also helped to cool him a little. Otherwise I just used to sit with him until he knew where he was and who I was, then he was very disorientated and sad.

His triggers were late nights or disturbed sleep. He did grow out of them I promise!

Original poster

ohdeaeyme · 22/04/2017 15:27

if i go near her she runs away, touching her isnt an option

OP posts:

Original poster

ohdeaeyme · 22/04/2017 15:30

she also has a tendency to hit her head or her hand against a wall.

pic is the bruise after one of the nights

OP posts:

WandaOver · 22/04/2017 15:42

DS2 had them from age 2 to 9.
There is nothing you can do once they start. He never remembered any of it.

Very late in the day I heard about the technique mentioned a lot on here. Wake them up half an hour before the usual time for the terrors to start. It works.

ShiningArmour · 22/04/2017 15:57

Wanda is correct, wake her up, it does work.

Original poster

ohdeaeyme · 22/04/2017 15:59

problem is there is no set pattern and if i wake her i scare her by doing that which freaks her out badly too

OP posts:

hiccupgirl · 22/04/2017 17:27

I know how horrible it's to deal with as DS had episodes of crawling round upstairs screaming, tying to get away from me as he didn't recognise me or where he. Was. But I promise, waking him did stop the cycle for the night. We had to restrain him most nights to hold him to the wake him but it was that, or he'd go in and out of the night terror for hours.

If she's hurting herself in them, I wouldn't think you have much to lose by trying to wake her tbh.

Original poster

ohdeaeyme · 22/04/2017 18:29

i will try waking her at 10 and see if it helps but i normally find trying to wake her startles her and causes her to scream anyway. need to find a gentle way to do it

OP posts:

Welshrainbow · 22/04/2017 19:52

You have my sympathy OP my DS also has night terrors, we've got them down to less than one a week now but a couple of months ago they were multiple times a night? Is your DD in the process of dropping naps? We found the biggest trigger for DS was being overtired when he went to sleep. We found that turning his light on or something a couple hours after he went back to sleep or going something else to stir him without totally waking him helped as it disrupts the sleep cycle so the next cycle when he goes into a deeper sleeper he wasn't as over tired definitely helped. Also when it happened he would thrash around and bang his head on wall throw himself off bed, it was impossible to hold him but found loud familiar music would sometimes disrupt the terror and wake him enough to bring him out of it.

cocodidit1 · 23/04/2017 16:25

Im a little late replying to this but my now five year old has been having these for around four years. It goes through periods of been very often and then slacks off for a while. At the moment we seem to be on a slack time so we are hopeful she is growing out of them.
I rang my Public health nurse for help when she was about two and she told me to get the house blessed as "we don't know what they are seeing!!!" This world is full of mental people...
I brought her to the doc, he said to gently wake her up around the expected time of the terror. (approx 10.30pm) This kinda helped i suppose. Its awful, hope they all grow out of them soon..

Original poster

ohdeaeyme · 23/04/2017 21:28

i woke her about 10.30 she didnt have a night terror but she ended up having nightmares on and off all night instead.

arghhhhh

OP posts:

plaintomatopasta · 23/04/2017 21:40

My lb is having lots of nightmares right now. It's too warm in his room.

Monr0e · 23/04/2017 21:45

I'm sorry your LO is suffering OP. At least they don't remember them in the morning.

My DS has had night terrors from the same age. He is 10 now and unfortunately still has them but much less frequently and we are able to bring him round much quicker these days.

Triggers tend to be being overtired or over stimulated. Ds would nearly always have one after an exciting day.
The biggest one for my DS is overheating. Keep the room and bedding cool, cotton sheets. This definitely helps.

They usually happen within the first hour of sleep. To break the cycle you don't have to completely wake her, just gently stir her enough to rouse her slightly

When DS is having one we take him into another room, hold him and gently talk to him, he shakes so bad his teeth chatter, it's awful to see. Luckily he comes out of them much quicker now and now he knows they've happened but still has no memory of what they were about

Good luck

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