Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go against my mums wishes

39 replies

UserOP · 21/04/2017 17:58

I decided today that I would like to run as an MP in the next election (the party I'm considering has open applications for my area)

When I told DM on the phone today, she massively kicked off, saying I was selfish and that if I become and MP the press would run stories about how she's on disability benefits etc.

I see her point but I think shes making this about her, and that I have a right to do whatever I want with my life. a AIBU?

OP posts:
Original poster
UserOP · 21/04/2017 17:59

Sorry for all the spelling mistakes, stupid phone!

OP posts:
AristotlesTrousers · 21/04/2017 18:01

Absolutely YANBU. What a great ambition to have. Your DM should be proud of you!

PuntCuffin · 21/04/2017 18:11

DH has been threatening to stand too. He has been doing this intermittently since we met. I have consistently told him that I do not want to be an MP's wife and he should decide which is more important to him, his marriage or his desire to be an MP. I told him how I felt before we were married so as far as I am concerned, he has already made the decision.

My position is because there are things in my dim and distant past which I do not want to read about in the Daily Heil. DH doesn't know about them and it is best kept that way.

I have both a previous boyfriend who was an MP and a close relation who is still one now.

alfagirl73 · 21/04/2017 18:12

Good for you! Takes guts to do that. Go for it. YANBU.

ArsenalsPlayingAtHome · 21/04/2017 18:13

Do it UserOP. I thought you were going to say she kicked off because she didn't want you to have the pressure & stress. Sounds like the kind of thing my mother would do - make it about her. Not that I'd ever be that ambitious! Good luck!

SabineUndine · 21/04/2017 18:14

Blimey. Tell your mum it's not about her! I think it's great you have ambition.

TenFeetTall · 21/04/2017 18:18

I think we need more MPs whose families are on disability benefits. You have seen first hand how screwed the system is and I would hope you would use that to help drive change. It makes me sad that she believes being disabled is a shameful secret. It shows how absolutely broken our society is.

TenFeetTall · 21/04/2017 18:19

YANBU btw. It's not an easy job at all and I wish you luck. Just make sure you know what you are letting yourself in for,

CheeseCakeSunflowers · 21/04/2017 18:20

Why is her claiming disability benefits a problem? If she qualifies for them that's fine. I say go for it.

MiltopMighty · 21/04/2017 18:21

YANBU. Go for it. There is no shame in your mum being on disability benefits. Cameron's son received disability benefits.

Bantanddec · 21/04/2017 18:23

Yanbu OP and good luck! I don't see how it's got anything to do with her disability benefits!

ragz134 · 21/04/2017 18:23

YANBU. It is your life.
I would imagine if your party has opened up applications then they are not in with a likely chance of winning anyway?

MovingtoParadise · 21/04/2017 18:24

Yanbu

I'm also considering it. But it's really hard work campaigning and getting elected.

Original poster
UserOP · 21/04/2017 18:29

Thanks Everyone

Just to clear up, DM receives disability for MH problems and she has constantly been reviewed and accused of lying, so it's not totally unreasonable for her to worry about stories that could be used against her etc

OP posts:
Birdsgottaf1y · 21/04/2017 18:41

Are you going to support your Mum fully,if the exposure causes a deterioration in her MH?

It depends on what Party you are standing for, some get more interest than others on certain issues, but there is always a level of interest.

Do you have Teens, what do they think?

PovertyPain · 21/04/2017 18:43

I do feel sorry for your mum, op. It's entirely up to you what you do, but how will you feel if a story about your mum's mental health appears in the local paper? It is something you need to discuss further with her, if you want to maintain a close relationship, assuming you have a good relationship, that is.

AppearingNormal · 21/04/2017 18:48

Is it UKIP ?

RebootYourEngine · 21/04/2017 18:49

I think its great that you want to follow your ambitions however i can see where your mum is coming from because when you are in the public eye you are opening yourself up to a lot of abuse.

MiltopMighty · 21/04/2017 18:49

If it is UKIP then YABU

Tootsiepops · 21/04/2017 18:50

It could involve a level of media scrutiny that your mum's mental health may not be able to cope with. I would consider her feelings before I went ahead with it (not saying you shouldn't do it, but you do need to be realistic about how intrusive it might be for the people connected to you).

Original poster
UserOP · 21/04/2017 18:50

No, it's one of the two major left wing parties

OP posts:
Obsidian77 · 21/04/2017 18:54

A tough one.
I'm about 70% in favour of you going for it, the country needs more decent principled people playing an active part in the democratic process.
At the same time it could be very gruelling for your mum and definitely trigger her MH issues.

Original poster
UserOP · 21/04/2017 18:57

I think at the minute I'm struggling to be fully sympathetic to her because of the way she handled it. She had a massive go, and didn't at any point acknowledge the dilemma

I don't have teens just a young DD Smile

OP posts:
AppearingNormal · 21/04/2017 19:02

How much experience have you got, are you politically active now ?

AppearingNormal · 21/04/2017 19:02

experience at a local political level I mean ...