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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Car accident. So confused??? Looking for reassure for my dad.

93 replies

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 14:21

About 2 weeks ago my parents and brother were involved in a car accident, their care was totalled in the accident. Everyone was generally banged up but nothing serious, however, the other driver received a dislocated shoulder.
My dad has taken it very badly, he was in shock for a while after and now incredible down because he is worried about what will happen.
From what my parents and brother say, my dad was pulling out into a road that has a mini roundabout, he looked but saw nothing coming. This road is a bit dangerous as it has a bit of a blind spot as the road from where other car came is blocked by parked cars on either side of the road.
Half way round this mini roundabout a car came out of nowhere it slammed on the breaks even though he did break as there are two massive skid marks on the road, he still hit my dads car spinning it around and pushed it across the road. It hit the car between the drivers and back passengers door which made it spin round. I don't want to say what the make of my dad or the other car is but my dad's car is an estate car and very heavy and the other car was smaller and lighter, which suggest, to me, that the other car was going too fast.
Anyway, while this happened my brother, managed to get hold of my grandparent who came down and helped. my Granda took the car camera down ready to give to the police when they came. However, the women behind the other car was an off-duty police officer, states she saw the accident and it was my dad's fault. Because of this my grandad refused to give her the camera as she was now a witness and she shouldnt have anything to do with the evidence. (my grandad is an ex-policemen so understood procedure)
The off-duty policewomen then went around telling all other witnesses that it was my dads fault and she was a policewoman, my mum seems to think this was very unprofessional and hindered them getting witnesses. ( my mum is also an ex policewoman)
So now my dad is in a state, will not eat or talk, determined he will lose his license and be unable to take my mum to her hospital appointments (she is disabled now) and will go to prison. The policeman at the scene said he will leave it to the insurance company to sort out. But he does want a statement from everyone because this policewoman told them it was my dad's fault even though the care was definitely going too fast. Also, it is highly unlikely that she saw the other car from where she was because she was behind and her vision was obscured.

OP posts:
ComputerUserNotTrained · 19/04/2017 14:54

"Off duty police officer" is more likely a friend of the driver who crashed into your dad, hence scarpering when actual officers arrived. Don't suppose anyone took her details?

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 14:56

WateryTart- unfortunately, my parents were being strapped to board to go off in the ambulance. The on-duty policeman only took the policewoman statement as the other witnesses seem to be scared off or assumed they were not needed as she was going around telling everyone what happened.

OP posts:
CarrieBradshaw85 · 19/04/2017 14:56

10storeylovesong, the OP stated that her mum and granddad do not know the current legislation.

RhodaBorrocks · 19/04/2017 14:56

I should add that in my case it was a larger roundabout and I was already completely on it. The other car entered the roundabout from the next entrance - straight into my passenger side.

KitKat1985 · 19/04/2017 14:57

Unless your Dad was driving dangerously or under the influence of alcohol, he won't go to prison, so he needs to calm down.

I'm a bit unclear from your post exactly what happened. Obviously on a roundabout you give way to the right, and to traffic already on the roundabout. Was your Dad already on the roundabout when the other car joined (in which case I'm guessing the other car would have hit the passenger side of your Dads car) in which case it would be the other cars fault. Or your Dad pulled out in front of a car already on the roundabout, which would be his fault?

ComputerUserNotTrained · 19/04/2017 14:58

Op's dad's car being hit on the side surely suggests that he was already on the roundabout though? If his car hit the other car in the side then it would suggest that he was in the wrong.

I think. I'm no police officer (something people should be pleased about - I'd be crap Grin )

tiggytape · 19/04/2017 15:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RhodaBorrocks · 19/04/2017 15:00

It depends which side, computer - passenger side would make it more likely to be the other driver's fault, drivers side more likely that OP's Dad pulled out in front of someone.

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 15:00

The off-duty police officer identified herself to everyone showing her warrant card. So she was a police officer, however, a very unprofessional one it seems Hmm but gave him her name and number then disappeared quickly.
One the policewomen knowing the other driver, I would like to add though, both officers seemed to know the other driver. So its very [hmmm] hence why my dad is worrying so much

OP posts:
Reow · 19/04/2017 15:01

Roundabout collisions very often go 50/50 liability

Ceto · 19/04/2017 15:03

I don't really understand how this is OP's father's fault - it sounds as if he was on the mini roundabout and was hit because the other driver approached at speed from the side road and didn't stop. On any interpretation if this was a junction the other car shouldn't have been speeding so much that it hit the car on the roundabout with that much force.

But, as PP say, even if it was his fault it will just be an insurance claim and nothing really to worry about.

Nicknacky · 19/04/2017 15:03

What has she done wrong apart from telling people that she thought it was your dad's fault? Which it's very possibly likely to be.

You mentioned she disappeared now you are saying she gave a statement?

tiggytape · 19/04/2017 15:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ginnybag · 19/04/2017 15:05

OP, did the car enter from the left or the right of your Dad?

Priority belongs to existing traffic, and then its give way to the right.

If he was already fully on the roundabout when the other car approached the junction, it the other driver's fault.

If the other car entered from the left, and should have given way to your dad, it's the other driver's fault.

If the other car entered from the right of your dad, it's less clear, because there's an argument that he should have let the other car proceed.

Short of him being drunk, however, or driving like a lunatic, the worst that's going to happen is the insurance company blame him. They'll pay any costs and his premiums will be higher for a few years.

CotswoldStrife · 19/04/2017 15:06

Hmm, to be hit on the driver's side on a roundabout it is possible that your dad pulled out when it wasnt safe to do so because the other driver would have to be going at a heck of a rate to hit your dad's car in front of it (but it's possible). Have you got a photo of the skid marks, where do they start from? Part way across the roundabout or at the junction on to it?

I've been hit on a roundabout but I was already on it and was hit in the passenger side (also spun round) because the other car didn't stop.

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 15:06

That is all very true.
But it seems that from the skid marks show that the other car, when it did break was three car away from the junction and went over the round about and went over hitting my dads car.

OP posts:
BToperator · 19/04/2017 15:08

There is usually someone at fault in an RTC, and in this case it is your Dad, but that does not mean he will be prosecuted, just that it was his mistake that caused the accident. If the officer that dealt with it at the time said it was going to be left to insurance companies to sort, and they have not been in touch since, I'd imagine there is nothing to worry about.

If your Dad is still that worried though, it might be worth contacting the officer that dealt with it, for reassurance that nothing further is going to happen. I'd imagine he's filed the paperwork and forgotten about it by now! The off duty police officer sounds very unprofessional, if in fact she was actually a police officer. I'd have thought most actual police officers would know better.

JessieMcJessie · 19/04/2017 15:13

I don't understand why the off diity policewoman was asking to see the camera. None of her business. Very glad your Grandad resisted this and only handed it over to the police who attended the scene.
Which side was your Dad's car hit?

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 15:15

I would like to clarify that my dad was on the roundabout when he was hit. As the other driver hit the car at an angle and slide along the car pushing my dad's car across the road.
Apparently, if the man had not of been speeding, and hit his breaks he could have passed safely behind my dad car.
I honestly believe it was just an accident and my dad has nothing to worry as there was probably fault on both sides.

OP posts:
CotswoldStrife · 19/04/2017 15:15

Three cars (presumably lengths) away from the junction and it hit your dad's car halfway across a mini roundabout? That does sound like your dad pulled out on the other drive, sorry Sad

Did he tell the Police Officer that he was also a former officer? It is difficult to make headway with anyone suffering from anxiety so I doubt he'll be reassured until the insurance make contact - I hope it's soon!

10storeylovesong · 19/04/2017 15:15

I also don't understand how she vanished as the officer attended but managed to give a statement...

The off duty officer does sound from this account as though she was behaving uprofessionally, however it doesn't matter whether the on duty officer knew the driver or not. It is the insurance companies who sort out liability and settlements, not the police. This would be recorded as a minor injury RTC and I doubt the officer has thought any more about it since. Although this is understandably traumatic to your dad it's probably one of 10-15 incidents that officer attended that day. For a minor injury RTC police will not be taking collision photos or anything like that - they just don't have the resources / time.

Ceto · 19/04/2017 15:18

If your father's car was on the roundabout, surely he has priority and the other car should have stopped at the junction?

Seeingadistance · 19/04/2017 15:19

It seems to me that the details of the accident itself, and who is going to be found to blame, aren't really the problem here.

The real problem is that the OP's father is overly and quite illogically anxious and worried about what will happen next. I think he should go to see his GP about his anxiety and see if he can get medication or some kind of counselling, e.g., CBT.

There is no way that he would go to prison for what is a fairly common type of road accident, in which no one was seriously injured.

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 15:19

Sorry to confuse you all she didn't give a statement. Just gave her id number and name before she disappeared.

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 19/04/2017 15:21

There is no issue with her leaving quickly though. She has provided her details as a witness then left. Officers don't always take statements at the scene of a rtc as they are often busy with the incident.

I would focus more on your dad and dealing with the insurance tbh