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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want my money back?

9 replies

NCersorry · 19/04/2017 10:12

Hi,
I can't drive ATM and a friend offered to help me learn to cut costs down: the intention was to learn mostly from them then book a few hours of proper lessons.
Lessons here are very expensive (I'm not in the UK) so to help my friend out I offered to buy them tyres (400 dollars) and fill their tank every week which costs approx 50 dollars. I filled the tank once and paid for the tyres. So this week we started we went out once and went over a couple of things just what everything does how to start up and move off. Very basic stuff and it was all fine.
However it transpires that the joint owner of the car, his partner, who was aware of this and happy with this arrangement is no longer happy with this.
I'm not sure why but apparently she is worried.
I'm happy to pay for any damages and there are no legal or insurance issues with this arrangement. However I can understand her reservations so would've been happy had this been said prior. Alas, it wasn't.
I've asked for at least some of my money back (the money for the tyres but not the fuel, even though 95 percent of the fuel was unused which is fine I didn't expect to use it all just wanted to be nice) and my friend has gone quiet despite reading my messages.
AIBU to want my money back? Sad

OP posts:
Lasagna · 19/04/2017 10:22

I think they might have just used you to pay for their new tyres im afraid.

YANBU, get ALL your money back and don't let them fool you again.

Pigeonpost · 19/04/2017 10:24

New tyres? Yup, they saw you coming there. What a pair of con artists. Don't make contact again, they aren't your friends and have screwed you over.

Vaus · 19/04/2017 10:29

Are you in the US or Aus?

NCersorry · 19/04/2017 10:35

I think you may be right that they saw me coming. I knew they needed new tyres so offered I wasn't asked I just wanted to be nice, as it still would've worked out cheaper for me and beneficial for them too. I guess I'll have to pay for both now (lessons too) which is a bit shit but I guess you live and learn. I will try to get my money back but I'm not sure I'll get anywhere with it.

OP posts:
Postagestamppat · 19/04/2017 10:51

I would be so tempted to slash those tyres! The friendship is obviously over if they haven't offered to pay you back. Either you a) will have to ask/demand for the 400 dollars back or b) they will not give you the money. Which leaves you in pissed off or out of pocket.

Were you good friends with this bloke? It is a pretty close and personal thing to do, if you see what I mean. The amount of patience and time you need to spend with someone to help them learn to drive is huge. I could only do it with dh or my parents (and in both cases arguments were had and tears were shed!). Do you think that maybe the partner may have felt threatened by the driving lessons?

BTW if you are in australia, there are insurance issues. The insurance company must be notified and your premiums will go up.

Do you know for a fact that the partner was informed BEFORE you started the lessons? Was she told in front of you? Your friend may not be the first man who glosses over or gives a "yeah, yeah it's all cool", only to have an irritated partner who then puts her foot down when she realises what is actually going on.

HecateAntaia · 19/04/2017 11:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pepperpot99 · 19/04/2017 12:44

Mixing business and pleasure never works imo. Sorry but you have been fleeced.

Allthewaves · 19/04/2017 12:53

That's awful. They owe you at least £400. I suspect they don't have the money to give u

ThePants999 · 19/04/2017 14:01

Congratulations - for the relatively low cost of $400, you've learned that this friend of yours actually isn't one.

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