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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Was I u to ditch this friend?

3 replies

Cerealnamechanges · 16/04/2017 17:41

I've just ditched a friend but not sure if a was a bit unreasonable .
Been friends a few years, I do most of the leg work, arranging etc, I remember her kids birthdays, take gifts offer to babysit as friends do
She's always been a bit flakey, probably couldn't name my kids (they are teens, hers are toddlers) always wrapped up in her own life, I know everyone is but we always talked about her, I always felt like I was an option rather than a priority (I'm not a needy friend btw)
Saw her 6 months ago, told her I was going into hospital in 3 days time, went in, had operation, a few days pass, hear nothing
Was a bit let down, as weeks passed, still nothing, not even a "how are you" or "get well soon"
Weeks turn in to months
Bumped into her the other day she says "why didn't you text?" I said "why didn't YOU text?"
I was at work and busy so she just replied "I'll text you now before I forget" and left
4 days later, no text
So I text her saying the reason I hadn't text was because I told her I was having an op and she never thought to text me
She text back saying she was sorry and she would buy me lunch
I said it didn't matter, I was fine about it
She mentioned lunch again and I said I would rather not
She's deleted my daughter off Facebook
I'm not bothered as she wasn't a very good friend, but was I a bit unreasonable to ditch her like that?

OP posts:
longlostpal · 16/04/2017 17:44

No, of course not. It doesn't sound like the friendship was ever a big deal for either of you, but possibly it was less so for her, maybe simply as she was busy. I can understand it was hurtful that she never asked how you were. Sounds like the friendship has run its course.

HappyFlappy · 16/04/2017 17:46

Sounds like you've ditched each other. I wouldn't worry about it - be polite if you run ito her but don't feel under any obligation to be pally.

She seems a bit meh to have deleted your DD because she's upset with you. Your dd's done nothing.

twoandahalftimesthree · 16/04/2017 17:51

Maybe i'm not very sensitive but I had an op a few weeks ago, one of my oldest friends forgot about it (even tho I'd seen her and we'd talked about it a week before) but it didn't bother me. She was however mortified when she saw me a couple of days after the op on my crutches and realised she'd forgotten about it!
This friend of yours didn't text you at all for 6 months tho? and you didn't text her? maybe you'd just grown apart anyway...

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