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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Not a TAAT, but with reference to the Joan restaurant bill thing...

44 replies

LapdanceShoeshine · 15/04/2017 19:47

2-week 2-centre holiday in Spain for 2 couples, one with DS aged 14, one with 2 DSs aged 14 & 10.

One adult (parent of 2 DSs) did all the organising. Accommodation costs split in half.

For meals out, when it was suggested that bills were split down the middle, couple with 1 DS went along with it, but grudgingly and clearly feeling hard done by. (10-yr-old did not eat a lot)

Who WBU?

OP posts:

x2boys · 15/04/2017 20:55

what happened to joan and the cheese eaters by the way was the thread deleted?

PurpleDaisies · 15/04/2017 20:57

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2904276-To-think-my-friend-is-a-tight-arse?msgid=68352787#68352787

It's still there x2boys. Op is still awol.

x2boys · 15/04/2017 20:58

oh thanks couldnt find it for a while greedy feckers!

OverthinkingSpartacus · 15/04/2017 22:20

For meals out, when it was suggested that bills were split down the middle, couple with 1 DS went along with it, but grudgingly and clearly feeling hard done by.

Theres a few children in my family who don't eat a lot but we've never been to place where you're charged based on what's eaten, you pay the same price regardless, so even if one of your children didn't finish their meal, it would cost the same and even if it only outs the other families bill up by a pound a or two, that adds up if it's once a day for two weeks. I wouldn't be bothered paying extra and saving my friend a bit on her own bill as a one off and often do when eating out with sis and her two dds, but wouldn't offer on holiday when we'd be eating out everyday and sis would refuse even I did suggest it.

Why did you keep suggesting splitting the bill when you say she clearly felt hard done by? I'd have picked up she didn't want to subsidise one of my child's meals and not ask to bill split during the rest of the holiday tbh.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 15/04/2017 22:26

greedy wine swilling, cheese eating shower of shites

I think the Thread Police decided that should be shower of shytes

SandyDenny · 15/04/2017 22:27

So the family of 4 paid the same as the family of 3 but got one more meal?

Have I understood that correctly? How could you think that was a reasonable way to split things.

NoSquirrels · 15/04/2017 22:32

Accommodation is split on rooms occupied- so each family = 2 rooms so fair.

Food is split on people, surely to god? You/your DC eats or drinks it, you pay for it?

Family with most people pay most, or at least offer to pay more - leaving the option open for other family to feel generous at 50/50 rather than fuming!

3boys3dogshelp · 15/04/2017 22:36

We have 3dc and went away with friends who have one (I organised, my boys shared a room).
We split the accom 50:50 then split the food 5:3 then they put 5 times as much food on their dc's plate as he could eat and bloody wasted it but never mind I would feel cheeky any other way.

Lakegeneva40 · 16/04/2017 07:58

Sorry op Yabu. Accommodation fine. Meals not fine. Even one extra person makes a huge difference over 14 days.

FrancisCrawford · 16/04/2017 08:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Astro55 · 16/04/2017 08:14

I agree 50/50 is unfair!

DSis has one - I have 3 -

She works out her share roughly and I pay the rest - it's not that difficult!

Emphasise · 16/04/2017 08:17

These threads always puzzle me, I think some people have the wrong friends! In my circle we're far more likely to "argue" because we feel we haven't paid enough ourselves.

Eg I'm going out tomorrow with my 2dc and a friend who has 1. Friend will want to split 50/50 which I won't like, as it means I haven't paid my share, we'll argue a bit and it will be agreed that I buy the ice-cream.

Similarly in a pub with a group, the only thing anyone's checking cash wise us that they're not the one who hasn't paid their share..

As the parent of 2 DC in the Op, there's no way I would have suggested a 50/50 split and if it had been offered, I wouldn't have accepted and neither would any of my friends

Dozer · 16/04/2017 08:23

IMO you were in the wrong OP and should definitely have paid for DS2's food.

The organiser shouldn't expect financial advantage for it.

sueelleker · 16/04/2017 08:34

We used to pay on alternate days.

Astro55 · 16/04/2017 08:35

How is paying on alternative days any fairer?

roundaboutthetown · 16/04/2017 09:50

Ridiculous to split meals out down the middle.

NeedABumChange · 16/04/2017 09:54

I would have split all meals in half for ease but then the 1ds family could pay for a whole meal on one night to even it out.

Floggingmolly · 16/04/2017 09:56

Did you think the subbing of your second child was your payment for organising everything, op? How much organising was necessary and were you actually asked to do it?

roundaboutthetown · 16/04/2017 10:24

Clearly you are mathematically challenged and can just about do dividing by two, but not adding up of your fair share. Maybe it is your inability with maths that makes you think dividing meals out in half was a fair arrangement.

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