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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To still be using a car seat for my daughter?

54 replies

TheHuntingOfTheSarky · 13/04/2017 14:41

DD1 is 9.5 and 139cm. If I'm not reading it wrong, under UK law she is no longer obliged to use a booster seat in the car as she's over 135cm.. However, all Eurooean countries and also UK safety experts suggest she should be using one until she's 150cm tall.

135cm seems really low to me so when I discovered that all these other places are still saying 150cm we decided we would continue to use ours until she's this tall.

However, asking around some friends it seems like we are in the minority for doing this. In fact a few people said I was being overly protective and that as long as she's tall enough for UK law we are being unreasonable to "make" her keep using her seat. I was a bit Confused as the implication seemed to be that I was being an uncool mum and she'll be the only one in the year still treated like a baby etc etc.

DD still has to use her high-back seat on journeys involving the motorway or fast roads, but we do have a backless one for shorter journeys as it makes her feel a bit more grown-up and she says it's more comfortable.

I think my friends are crazy and I'd rather be uncool than unsafe but they think it's the other way round and I'm fussing too much. AIBU or are they?

OP posts:
TheTurnOfTheScrew · 13/04/2017 15:56

10yo dd1 is well over 140cm and to my untrained eye looks like she still benefits from a booster in terms of where the seatbelt sits on her. I assume this may differ from car to car and child to child, but for now we're sticking with the booster.

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/04/2017 16:05

I'd be astounded if lives were saved by keeping 10 yo children of 140 cm in booster seats. I think the car seat manufacturers have an excellent lobby system. But it doesn't hurt if she's ok with it.

Notso · 13/04/2017 16:19

I've read a lot on Facebook groups about keeping children in harnessed seats past the weight/height limit and keeping children in boosters past the legal limits.
Are there any safety implications in doing this?
My 6 year old is 132cm and growing fast, PIL are making noises about him going on a backless booster or no booster. They query whether the seat is actually safe for him over the limits.
I can understand more with a harnessed seat if the child was well over the weight limit would the harness actually do its job in a crash. A high back booster is just putting the child in the correct position for the seatbelt right?

relaxo · 13/04/2017 16:24

Seat belts are designed with a person who is 150cm in height in mind. Therefore it serves as a tool that improves safety and comfort as the seatbelt isn't cutting in at the wrong angle.

Vinorosso74 · 13/04/2017 16:26

My 7yo DD is 135cm and we're still using high back booster. I did wonder about when we stop but there's room for growth still and 7 seems too young to not use it. That said I think she'll outgrow the one in my parent's car very soon.

Original poster
TheHuntingOfTheSarky · 13/04/2017 16:49

DD is very skinny so I can't see her outgrowing any of her seats width ways any time soon, but that is obviously a consideration - especially on long journeys.

We'll continue on for as long as she's happy and comfortable. Thankfully she's not bothered about being 'cool' yet Smile.

OP posts:
PrincessHairyMclary · 13/04/2017 17:22

My 7 year old DD is 140cm, I've only recently passed my test so we've only ever had her trunki booster seat for occasional journeys but she still uses it and will continue to do so until she's 150cm.
However when we go in other peoples cars I'm happy for her to go without.

AliceKlar · 13/04/2017 17:39

Seat belts are designed with a person who is 150cm in height in mind. Therefore it serves as a tool that improves safety and comfort as the seatbelt isn't cutting in at the wrong angle

I didn't know that.I'm just 5' and the seatbelt cuts into my neck. I might stick a cushion on my seat which would maybe stop that. It's not a problem so much in winter with thicker clothes on but in summer in a tee shirt I get a red, sore mark on longer trips.

megletthesecond · 13/04/2017 17:43

10yr old ds is still on a booster cushion most of the time. He's 145cm. He hates it and I've had to chill out when he goes in friends cars if it's not practical to give them his booster. He's definately way in the minority and I probably won't use it once he hits year 6 in the autumn.

madamginger · 13/04/2017 17:57

10.5 year old DD is still in a booster seat. I think she is in the minority among her friends but she sits in the middle seat and the seat belt comes out of the roof and digs in her neck if she's not sat on it.
I couldn't tell you how tall she is though Blush

RedBugMug · 13/04/2017 18:02

yanbu
hbb are much, much safer than no seat or even booster cushions.
it's not only about the hight, it's also about side impact protection (front seats are safer in that regard) and positioning of the seatbelt on a growing and therefore weaker skeleton.

Batgirlspants · 13/04/2017 18:11

Your dd your call op. Ignore other people if she's happy and you are happy nobodies business.

Aloethere · 13/04/2017 18:14

My son is almost 10 and still in a high back booster, we are in Ireland where it is the law to have them in car seats until they are 150cm. Here it is perfectly normal, there is no teasing. The kids know it is safest.

Daydream007 · 13/04/2017 18:14

You are putting your child's safety first, ignore anyone who sneers. Some people sacrifice safety to save a few quid.

MotherCrazyCat · 13/04/2017 18:18

YANBU for considering your child's safety

DD, is 21 months, and I'd have her rear facing if I could. Unfortunately her hip dysplasia means her legs are uncomfortable folded up for too long and it gives her pain and discomfort so instead we a FF seat with a harness. She's been FF since 9 months but I always carried a letter from her consultant explaining why until she was 18 months, never had to use it as never got stopped by the police.

Wish she could be RF as I feel it's safer. I do plan to keep her in a car seat/HBB until she's 140cm ish. I'm only just 150cm and struggle with the seat belt unless I have a cushion under me so if it feels unsafe for me as a grown adult, it's definitely unsafe for my DD.

Instasista · 13/04/2017 18:19

I'm surprised, usually car seat advocates can't wait to tell you all about testing, crash test dummies, European law in respect of car seats. It's not usual that they're questioning themselves, usually just boring you to death going on about it

Sittinginthesun · 13/04/2017 18:19

DS2 is 10 years old, no idea how tall but he's one of the taller children in his class, and he still uses a high back booster most of the time. He's very attached to it, and says it's comfy.

Mind you, he really doesn't care what people think. About anything. Grin

Oldraver · 13/04/2017 18:23

We have an ISOFIX booster in the back for DS...he is over the limit for this country now but we feel its safer for long journeys where he falls asleep as it has a strap to make sure the seat belt is above his shoulder.

He was desperate to finish with his booster but understands our reasoning. Non of his friends know as you cant see in the back (and he travels in the front when its just two of us). The odd occasion we have had friends in we have to remove the booster anyway as there is not enough room. He is a small for his age child but a HBB is too narrow n the shoulders for him now

HelenaJustina · 13/04/2017 18:26

My 9.5 yr old is 141cm and prefers a high back booster for long journeys as she has somewhere to rest her head.

She generally uses a booster with no back day-to-day and can go without one if I need to give another child a lift unexpectedly for example.

Your child, your car, your rules...

ExplodedCloud · 13/04/2017 18:37

Dd is nearly 150cm and still chooses to use her booster cushion because she can see more Confused

unlucky83 · 13/04/2017 18:37

DD2 is just 10 but the youngest in her class (in Scotland) - some of her peers are over a year older than her. Most haven't used boosters for quite a while. She is also quite tall for her age - by law she hasn't needed a booster for a while.
Our compromise for the last 6 months or so was a low backed booster on local journeys on 30mph roads - but she had to use the high backed booster on the 'fast' roads (60mph NSL A roads).
Now she has to use the booster without a back on the 'fast' roads and no booster on the 30mph short journeys.
However she still has to use the booster with the high back on long journeys - more than 30 mins - and especially on the motorway when we go to visit my parents (6hr drive) and I will expect her to until she is at least 11.
It is all a balance of risk really. The longer the drive the more risk of an accident and the higher the speed (not just your speed but others on the road) the more serious an accident would be.
It is embarrassing for her otherwise when we do eg lift shares to be in a car with 3 others her age /height (and shorter) without boosters ...bearing in mind some of her friends are over 11.

LatinForTelly · 13/04/2017 18:41

My nearly 10 year old 131 cm DS still uses a high backed booster. He's very skinny though. What brand do you use for your 7 - 10 year olds as my average sized 7 yo says the HBB is too small and much prefers just a booster.

PickAChew · 13/04/2017 18:42

We've just moved our 149cm onto a booster cushion in our car because the seatbelt doesn't fit him. He's fine in a Corsair or similar, but the back seat back in our car is much higher

LatinForTelly · 13/04/2017 18:43

To answer the question, OP, no, yanbu, I think what you're doing sounds sensible.

OhSoggyBiscuit · 13/04/2017 19:19

I'm amazed that about around 7/8 I dropped my booster seat entirely! What were my parents thinking?!