Aibu or is it just lack of sleep?

[Marmalady75]

My ds(2) is not a good sleeper. We are staying with my in laws for a few days. He sleeps in the room next to the kitchen. He actually went to sleep without a huge fuss tonight and at a reasonable time. I got about 2 hours sleep before I was woken by him screaming. Turns out fil had gone to make himself a cuppa and was making a fair bit of noise opening and closing cupboards for some reason. My little boy was very upset at being woken like that and is still awake 3 and a half hours later (screaming every time I try to put him in the travel circle and jumping on the bed if I try to take him in with me. He is happily playing with his cars right now.
My aibu is this - my fil made himself a cuppa and disappeared back to bed. I'm rather annoyed that he didn't 1 - look in on the screaming child that he woke up, 2 - apologise for waking ds or at least 3 - offer to make me a cuppa too. Aibu?

OP- how do you know what woke him up if him screaming was what woke you up?

If your ds is a poor sleeper surely he's have woken anyway? People can't be expected to creep about in case they wake up a child. What would have happened if someone needed the loo and the flush woke him up?

However if he did make excessive noise he was of course unreasonable.you can make a cup of tea without banging about.

I'd not have looked in either as the last thing I'd want to do is make it worse which is what can happen when people interfere another people's sleep strategies

He absolutely shoulda offered to make you a cup of tea though.

Have you tried any kind of sleep training?

It's going to make it impossible to visit anywhere if rooms are out if bounds the second your ds is asleep wherever you are staying

I know it's not a big issue really. I was posting because I was tired and grumpy.
I have no issue with anyone making noise in their own house. I know he was banging about because I could hear the doors banging when. I went into ds.
To those suggesting I take him in with me, well I tried and he jumped about on the bed. My dh and I take turns at sitting up with him on nights like that and it just happened to be my turn.
My ds seems to be fine on little sleep (I am not so good without it). He seemed to get a fright and then he was awake for four and a half hours. It was like he had had a long nap and was full of beans when he woke up.
It was only really an issue because I wasn't at home where I would have felt more comfortable.
I made a joke of it with fil as life is just too short to fall out over such stuff. He says he didn't offer me a cuppa because he was filling his hot water bottle, so he needed all the water 😂

I totally understand that it must have been difficult, there's nothing worse being sleep deprived. Maybe you can make a joke with the in laws about the lack of sleep being torture, you know it's their place, but if they could be a bit quieter so DC doesn't wake up and think it's playtime.

Can I ask would a later bedtime this weekend be viable, especially being in a different environment and situation, so routine wise, things are really different.

Wishing you all the best, hope tonight is better for you It's times like this why you can empathise slightly with parents who used to use phenegren and old fashioned piriton to help sleep

What I would do if I were you is have DS in the bed with me and have DP sleep on the sofa. You could take it in turns to sleep in the bed/on the sofa if you prefer and if DS doesn't settle without you there, stay til he falls asleep then sneak out to the living room, or have an early night yourself That way no one has to tip toe around and everyone (hopefully) gets a decent sleep.

He may have thought the child would go back to sleep or him going in would make things worse.

My daughter and grandchildren live with me and my gd cot is the other side of the wall to my bed. It light heartedly infuriates my daughter that I never rarely hear her crying but sleep through it whilst she on the other hand sleeps on the other side of the house and wakes at everything. On the occasions I do I tend not to get involved as I think my daughter knows how best to settle her and seeing me may prolong the agony.

Thanks for all your replies.
I'm happy to report that ds slept for nearly 10 hours last night. We all got a good sleep and we weren't disturbed by anyone making a midnight cuppa or filling a hot water bottle.