Since the birth of my son things in my 5 year relationship have not been amazing. Iv not really got my sex drive back and we have since gone from and everyday to a once maybe twice a week couple. My son is now 9 months old. This did not happen when I had my first 2 years ago. This has caused alot of problems with my partner hes forever sulking because im not up for it and so on.
Since we have not been at it every day we seems to argue more and more. Its getting to the point we cant go a day without a argument and they just progressively seem to be getting worse and worse.
Anyhow about two months ago we find out im pregnant again and decide its not for the best to keep the child. We had a termination (I expect to get a hard time for that) its been about two months and im still feeling crap and upset about it.
For about two weeks after my partner is great but whenever I try to talk about my feelings he just shuts me down, it turns into a argument and he goes on about how he does not want to talk about it. Its ment iv bottled up how I feel about it but thats made me some what off I guess which has led to more arguments.
One argument we had I was asking him to spend the night watching films instead of him playing games. It blows up from there and he stated I just want sympathy and want to act like the victim since the abortion. Obviously this left me very hurt and upset so I watches films in bed that night and cried alone. I dont know when he came to bed.
A few days later we were arguing about money. I had 100 pound in my purse went and did what I needed to do for everyone and he blew his lid because he needed 40 pound (we are skint until tomorrow) but what he needed the money for could of waited until tomorrow.
Of course this blows up and hes sat screaming at me about how he wont stay with someone who wont have sex with him (we had sex the night before) and when I calmly explained I have not been great the last few months with the termination, a kidney infection and now my period he said to me I was trying to act a victim about the termination, we both agreed to it and I should stop acting so selfish and off with everyone. All I said to him was I have noone to talk to about how I feel which is why I am probably acting off and he responded with "you and me chose to have a termination its not like you miscarried stop fantasizing about the dead baby you didnt want"
I dont know if I can forgive that. Could he be hurting which is why he said it? Is he just a prick? Is the fact everything isnt normal at the moment making things like this? Is it my fault?
Anything to help make me make sense of this and make it better is much welcome even if its me thats in the wrong so I can try and fix this