2beesornot2beesthatisthehoney ·
11/04/2017 18:27
Ok so as not to drip feed here is a bit of background, my MIL has always been tricky , attention seeking and hyper. However for all the years I have known her, I have found the trick has been visits in short doses and channelling her boundless energy.
Now we seem to have arrived in a new phase which started on a short holiday with them 2 years ago where she seemed to have an even worse dose of munchhausen which worsened last year after another big family function when after the munchhausen didn't have any effect on me she pretended to drown which is when I flipped my lid . ( a bit).
There was a certain cloud till they left the next day and I told DH I didn't want them coming to our house whilst we were away shortly after as already arranged to be with younger but adult daughter. Cue more attention seeking including a premonition about our flight and other stuff to try to get us to beg them to come. Didn't work they didn't come (DD was fine ) and to be fair since then our relationship has been a little tense and not the same.
DH has been up once I think, they haven't been here . Not that unusual, they don't like travelling much and only come about once a year anyhow.
So to now. We are planning a big wedding anniversary event and we would like them to come, I know that this matters to DH . They are playing hard to get. Lots of excuses why they can't make it including possible terrorism in the big smoke , travelling , health.
But they can still manage other stuff like helping an elderly infirm relative and heavy gardening so I do think these are excuses not real reasons.
Just like last summer I think they want us to beg them to come so they can feel needed and special . I think this is more attention seeking on her part and the FIL would generally need no excuse to avoid a party, even tried to get out of the wedding last year!
It's not like we are great party animals we just wanted to mark this special anniversary in a special way. I realise that what we are asking is an invitation and not a summons to anyone we invite , although most responses have been positive. It's just that I know it will take the edge off things for DH if his parents don't come. We have talked about it and decided that we will send the invite anyhow, and then leave things till later on and ask again.
I really don't want it to end with begging, it's their choice but I feel for my DH. WWYD