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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be mad at DH

41 replies

cparker1990 · 11/04/2017 01:55

Long story short, DH rear ended someone in his truck when we were going out for dinner, his fault. Baby is fine, thank the lord, it was only a small hit. DH has been so apologetic but I just can't help getting angry at him. I just don't understand how he could be careless enough to cause a car accident, especially when I'm pregnant. And now I have to worry about where we are going to get the money for raised car insurance rates, which has caused me to get really mad at him recently. AIBU?

OP posts:
SnugglyBedSocks · 11/04/2017 07:12

Thank goodness that you have never done anything wrong...Hmm

Let's hope when/if you ever have an accident he doesn't treat you like this!

abcBears · 11/04/2017 07:33

of course YABU, but if you are that angry, you obviously can't get over the shock. Not everybody process things the same way, you should try to get some help. It's not rational to be that angry about what sounds like a small incident.

WhataHexIgotinto · 11/04/2017 07:40

YABU. It was an accident. My DH always gets mad if i do something accidentally and can i just say, that it's bloody horrible to live with. Unless you're perfect in every single way, give him a break.

ShoesHaveSouls · 11/04/2017 07:52

YANBU to be shocked and angry. We all feel a little bit more vulnerable when pregnant, and I suspect this is why you're feeling this way.

Does he tailgate/drive too fast? Most rear-end accidents are caused by that, despite people saying 'it was just an accident'.

aniceglassofchianti · 11/04/2017 07:54

Crazy question, why are you so angry?

SheSaidHeSaid · 11/04/2017 08:28

It was an accident, they happen.

Give the guy a break.

NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom · 11/04/2017 09:04

So you drive in future, better hope you don't have an accident though after your treatment of DH for doing so... Hmm

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 11/04/2017 15:39

Accidents happen, give him a break

FourEyesGood · 11/04/2017 15:49

YABU.

When my DC1 was a few months old, he banged his head while DH was in charge. I was very annoyed. Until, that is, DC1 banged his head while I was in charge. I realised that DH hadn't been neglectful or irresponsible; it had been an accident. Accidents happen. Get over it and stop being mean to your DH.

TheStoic · 11/04/2017 16:36

He's very apologetic.

How long do you want to drag this out for?

WatchHowISoar · 11/04/2017 20:32

Is he a serial tailgater? Or did you warn him he was too close or driving badly? Ywnbu

Otherwise it was an accident in which case ywbu but understandably you are probably shaky.

happypoobum · 11/04/2017 20:43

Either it was an unfortunate accident in which case YABU

Or, he always drives like a dick, in which case YABU for being in a car with him at all.

ApplePaltrow21 · 11/04/2017 20:45

poor guy

Love51 · 11/04/2017 20:49

When I was pregnant, my emotions went flat. Except anger, that was the one my body kept. May have ranted at my boss a bit. Not reasonable. But once you notice your unreasonableness you can modify your behaviour.

nocake · 11/04/2017 21:42

DW once reversed into my sister's car, that was parked behind ours on the driveway, that she'd walked past to get into our car. These things happen, they're accidents and as long as he doesn't normally drive like an idiot you need to let it go.

seriouslyenoughalready · 11/04/2017 21:43

YABU unless he :
had been drinking alcohol
had been using drugs
was using his phone
was knowingly too tired to drive

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