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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is it normal for ten year old girls to be wearing makeup?

68 replies

catscurledupbythefire · 07/04/2017 22:28

DS is in year 5 and all the girls seem very interested in makeup. They subscribe to videos on YouTube about how to put it on and all have their own as birthday and Christmas presents.

I have younger girls. AIBU to be a bit taken aback/worried, and to hope it's just DSs school?

OP posts:
NennyNooNoo · 07/04/2017 23:00

I have a 9 year old DD. Other than nail varnish, no she doesn't wear / own any makeup. I'm not a make up person either though.

BackforGood · 07/04/2017 23:02

No

EyeStye · 07/04/2017 23:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WorraLiberty · 07/04/2017 23:07

My mum would have killed me if she'd seen me wearing makeup at that age Grin

But we're living in different times now, where kids are being brought up to learn that image is 'all important'.

For example, the vast majority of today's 9 and 10 year olds will have had countless photos of them put on social media by their parents, so their parents can get all the 'likes' 'hearts' and 'gorgeous' comments from their FB friends and family.

So it must be quite confusing if their parents then try to pretend they don't think the child's image is that important IYSWIM?

It's akin to my parents splashing my Poloroid photos across town/local newspapers during the 70s, and then acting surprised that I care so much about what I look like in public.

multivac · 07/04/2017 23:08

I'd be interested to know how many of the parents who are horrified/upset at the thought of a ten-year-old girl in make up wear full make up themselves as a standard part of their daily routine. And at what age they think it would be appropriate for that to start. 15? 18? 20?

JacquesHammer · 07/04/2017 23:10

It might be normal but it's shit. A ten year old girl who thinks she needs to wear make up has been massively let down by the people who should be shoring up her self esteem. My daughter will sure as fuck not be wearing make up at that age, even for "fun" at home

I actually disagree with that. I don't think - in a role play setting - it IS about low self esteem. A fortnight ago my DD and her friend tried to make themselves look "funnier" than each other. They had such way out "looks" it was like face paint. They weren't trying to make themselves look more beautiful - it was playing.

tovelitime · 07/04/2017 23:11

Year 6 and absolutely zero interest. None of the girls in the class do either. Lots are still in party dresses and patent shoes

Notcontent · 07/04/2017 23:12

My dd is in year 6 and none of her friends are into make up. Then again, most of them also don't have mobile phones yet and are not on Instagram! I am only mentioning this because from other threads I have read here, it seems that there are some year 5 girls that are treated by their parents like mini teenagers....

isupposeitsverynice · 07/04/2017 23:12

Is it about social media though or is it more about parental attitudes generally

I know so many (perfectly nice looking) women who whine on about how rough they look, how fat they are, so on so on we all know how this goes

Is it any wonder their lovely daughters who are the mirror image of their mums have low self esteem when they hear their mums say how ugly they are fifty times a day? Kids aren't daft they know they look like us.

isupposeitsverynice · 07/04/2017 23:14

Multivac I gave up make up for that exact reason - I didn't wear it much anyway - but when dd says "why are you doing that to your face" there is no good answer that isn't going to damage self esteem. There just isn't.

smurfest · 07/04/2017 23:14

Mine didn't wear it in year 5, no. By year 6 a noticeable portion of girls were wearing quite a bit of slap - I refused to let DD1 wear it to school on one non-uniform day and wrote a ranty letter to the head about the fact that the school were in no way cracking down on it.

By y7 I did back down and allowed her to wear it in moderation (losing battle etc). DD2 has never been bothered.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 07/04/2017 23:14

I think any primary school girl looks ridiculous in make up and I judge the parents for letting them do it. I'm not talking about a bit of lip balm or a pale nail varnish but anything else, yes, it's ridiculous.

I wear make up everyday because I have bad skin and I need it. Once a girl hits her teens, I think a bit of make up is ok as long as it's not ott like some of them. DD is 7 and has never asked me about her having make up on. She wanted her nails painted once for a wedding and that was it.

I know someone who talked about her DD having a dressing table for her make up. She was 6/7. She's 9 now and recently saw photos of her with obvious make up on, and her 5 year old sister. Looks bloody awful.

WorraLiberty · 07/04/2017 23:14

Banning makeup for fun, will probably just make them massively interested in it when they're a bit older.

Makeup should be fun - it is fun in my opinion and should be treated as such, rather then something that people couldn't contemplate leaving the house without.

I can go literally weeks without wearing any at all, and other times I decide to pop some on.

Easy come, easy go.

WorraLiberty · 07/04/2017 23:17

Probably a bit of both isupposeitsverynice

Parental attitudes and being put on social media for all or most of their lives.

Still, a kid being interested in makeup doesn't have to mean 'low self esteem'.

Kids have wanted to copy their parents and older teens since time began.

TheSparrowhawk · 07/04/2017 23:18

What's wrong with make up?

KnickerBockerGlooooory · 07/04/2017 23:20

DD2 (just 11) has got 2 Naked pallettes already, various brush sets and other bits from Claires/Primark. She watches a lot of tutorials on You Tube and looks amazing when she puts a full face on. BUT she's not allowed out of the house with more than a little eye make up, and only for parties. However DD1 (13) won't touch the stuff and really isn't interested... so. I think it is nature rather than nurture (I don't wear much makeup) but with the advent of You Tube etc these days it's difficult for those who ARE interested to turn a blind eye...

TheRealPooTroll · 07/04/2017 23:23

I've got a dd that age. She'll put a bit of glitter eyeshadow and lip balm on for parties but other than that no. Girls a year or so older seem to be wearing a full face full of contouring daily round here though Shock

Titsywoo · 07/04/2017 23:26

DD is 12 and a half and has no interest in makeup. I don't think I really did until around 14 although I mucked around trying my mums makeup and older friends before then.

Salmotrutta · 07/04/2017 23:26

I'm quite old by MN standards - just a couple of years short of 60 - and for me, growing up, the normal age to be applying makeup was about 15/16 in the 1970s.
That's how it was back then and if I'm honest I think it's pretty sad that 10 year olds are "putting on lip balm" etc.
I had a rather mad old Aunt who made me swear I wouldn't use make-up until I was at least 16 because it was "common" apparently....
I may have broken my promise...

MirandaWest · 07/04/2017 23:37

My DD is 11 and in year 6. She has some makeup - tinted lip balm, eye shadow and mascara and some other things. She bonded with her stepsister over it over Christmas (XHs wife's DD) and she taught her how to use it. I think she watches some YouTube videos about it too.
She doesn't wear it to school, wears it at home mostly and doesn't tend to wear it outside the house much at all. Is pretty subtle.
I don't think her self esteem is affected - she seems generally pretty happy in herself. She knows I don't wear makeup as I'm not interested in it and she knows it's fine to wear some and it's fine not to wear any.

Wriggler79 · 07/04/2017 23:40

Not keen personally, however DD(nearly 10) asked for, and was given by an aunt, a range of lipsticks. She has always had a sense of style/fashion- more so than me or DD(8). She has been experimenting with different colours. I'm quite accepting of this, as she is never out without a parent present, while wearing makeup. I feel like she is less likely to 'rebel' against my ideas if I let her do these small things now. She seems to feel closer to me because I'm fine with this stuff. I'm impressed with her choices tbh. I hope it will mean she feels more able to talk to me as she gets older.

Fuxfurforall · 07/04/2017 23:41

Mine had friends who wore full make up at the same age. I compromised by letting her wear it in the house so she could be like her friends which also gave a good opportunity to explain why I didn't think she should wear make up.

She is now 14 - still loves make up along with all her mates- but she is sensible with it, thankfully.

WorraLiberty · 07/04/2017 23:46

That makes sense Wriggler

My Mum was very anti makeup, despite the fact she used to wear some lipstick and powder if she went out with my Dad.

So when I became interested in it, aged about 12 or 13, I had no clue how to apply it or what to buy.

It was only my older sister who stopped me leaving the house, looking like I'd thrown it all up in the air and walked underneath it Blush

My Mum also used to frown upon leg shaving, but by the age of 12, I had the legs of a Greek footballer, so took my life in my own hands and nicked my Dad's (non safety) razor and shaved my legs in the bath, using soap of all things.

OUCH! Is all I can say.

ExplodedCloud · 07/04/2017 23:57

Dd is 10. She has some make up and wears eye shadow and lipstick for parties.
I rarely wear make up and to be honest I'd rather she tries it if she's curious. I spent my teenage years with a barrage of 'you don't need make up!'. It didn't help.
I think dd is using it nicely.

chastenedButStillSmiling · 07/04/2017 23:58

I have a 15yr old DD. At around that age she became massively interested in make up (made xmas and birthdays v v easy for wider family, and we had several very bonding sessions in Superdrug! So... win/win/win!)

She only wore it in the house.

She now almost never bothers. If you don't make it a demon, it doesn't become a demon... it's just a kid having fun and learning. Those are good things!

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