Make us laugh - applying for a job.

[SouthernNorthernGirl]

OK, so it's part of an application (yes, really!) that I will be sending via email.
I've been racking my brains, and I'm utterly stuck. I have a very dry sense of humour, and think that's mostly possible during conversations - not so easy as a one way thing.
Ignoring how this is, please help me!

Send them a link to an edgy sitcom like Peepshow . If they want laughs they can hire David Mitchell ffs.

The other day, I met the man who invented the window sil....

What a ledge.

In the Victorian era a newly promoted colonel arrives at his new posting in a small town in the West of Africa.

The commandant he is taking over from is showing him the camp and they come to his office.

“I’ll introduce you to your adjutant.”

He calls out

“Carruthers come out here.”

A weird man in an ill-fitting uniform appears, 3 feet tall, one withered arm, bald and cross-eyed.

“Tell him about yourself Carruthers” says the commandant.

“Well Sir, I got a first in philosophy from Oxford, where I got a boxing blue, played county level cricket and rode to hounds. I went to Sandhurst graduated top of my class and I am an expert marksman.”

“Oh not that stuff Carruthers, that’s in your file - tell him about the time you told the local witch doctor to bugger off”.

Only just managed to get back on - will catch up.

Oh, it's so hard. It's a tricky question, and I'm not sure how to answer still. Some good ones here, just wonder if they translate well.

I know it's a bit odd that they've asked the question, I just don't want to give up what could be a fantastic role for me.

I actually think it's a great interview question. It tests judgement really well. If you gave some of the answers people have suggested here, you wouldn't fit in at my company -- far too passive aggressive, not creative enough, rude, disrespectful, inflexible. Whereas some of the other suggestions I think have been great. It's very difficult to gauge this sort of thing in a written application and I think the question allows candidates to shine or hang themselves quite well.

(For those who suggest cultural fit is best done at interview: no, not if you can help it. In designing a good recruitment process you want as much as possible to filter candidates pre-interview. Interviewing is incredibly expensive in terms of management time and the more targetted you can be with interviews, the better.)

OP, I think your instincts are the same as mine as you've highlighted the suggestions that I liked, too.

I like this idea so much I might incorporate it into my own interview processes

Oh, and the poster who turned down a job because they were asked to sell themselves in a minute during the interview and they found that offensive, for some baffling reason??? Very odd. That question tests your ability to sell, to summarise, your emotional judgement, your ability to read a room -- all very important skills. To say that you're simply too good to be asked to demonstrate those is arrogant in the extreme and I would never hire such a person. I'm surprised you got the offer.

Maybe if it's a retail job, attach this: www.facebook.com/uniladmag/videos/2674867899202919/?pnref=story

Or you could try this:

www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10155094091962640&set=a.456630632639.238810.624967639&type=3

Or this:

Sigh, no wonder I have a shit job

I agree with Sarah - some really po-faced replies on this thread. And some people with a terrible sense of humour.

Now, what is an affiliate director?

Or this one

I'm off out Mum
You're not going anywhere dressed in that miniskirt
Why not?
I can see your bollocks, Dave

My humour is very rude. I can't see myself fitting in anywhere if this were asked at an interview. I'd have to think of something really boring like why did the Chicken cross the road.

Maybe you could think of a funny anecdote which is slightly embarrassing but still clean?

Mmm. It just seems a bit Alan Partridge or Colin the Office Joker. I'm not sure I'd want to work there either. I'd rather be asked about my experience or told about the job at an interview. Feels a bit over familiar.

How do you keep an idiot in suspense.......I'll tell you at my interview

There were 2 cats. One was called One Two and the other was called Un Deux. They had a competition to see who could swim across the river fastest. Who won?
One Two won because Un Deux Quatre Cinq.

SarahAnderson you're not really called Sarah Anderson are you?

Anyways I totally agree with you. This is a very interesting thread.

Did you hear the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac?

He stayed up all night wondering if there really was a Dog.

Apologies to dyslexic people!

Two guys walked into a bar.

You'd think the second one would have seen it.

Ridiculous and makes me want to say stuff your stinking job. However, I am not you, so how about something totally innocuous like this.

I like that one

Why do Marxists only drink herbal tea?

Because proper tea is theft

That's a really Silicon Valley-esque type question. God I hate them. Mid-interview: "Why are manhole covers round?" Because I have no fucking clue, that's why, I'll just let myself out now. "If you were going to fire one of us, which would it be and why?" Kill me now. Right. In. The. Face. Just do it. Urgh.

Sorry. Good luck OP.

Yes, because the manhole question pops up like everyday at work, doesn't it? Well, it would if you were applying for a roadworks position. Otherwise it's a bit wank

Zippy Indeed. I often find myself applying the manhole roundness knowledge in my everyday life. I hardly know how anyone who doesn't possess it survives.

Seriously though, I did actually go find out the answer in the end. I don't remember it any more but it was extremely technical and I would have had a better chance of being hit by lightning on a summer's day whilst sitting in that bloody interview "sandpit" would've been a bloody relief to get out of there than getting anywhere near the right answer.

What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt.

I don't get it