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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To worry about a friend that has taken a day off work to celebrate her dogs birthday, alone, with hats, personalised cake and those blowie things

106 replies

jdoe8 · 04/04/2017 13:29

It's just her and her dog, there have been 14 photos posted. She took her last breakup badly and has been forced to move somewhere that she doesn't like with work.

Is this normal for a woman in her mid 30s to do?

Not sure If I should call her or try to visit her soon

OP posts:

Thread gallery

KindDogsTail · 04/04/2017 14:12

Yes, it is normal, don't worry.
Her dog sounds like a child substitute for her and there is nothing wrong in that.

Her dog may come to understand birthdays too as being an exciting and special time with certain rituals to expect.

Puddington · 04/04/2017 14:13

Then again im not a dog or even pet person
This could have something to do with it tbh, a colleague of mine hand-knits her dog a Christmas sweater every year/makes her a stocking of her own full of dog toys and treats, absolutely celebrates the dog's birthday and is forever posting photos of the dog on social media. Colleague does also have a long-term DP and some good friends but everyone knows the dog takes priority! I think it's sweet to see an animal that is so completely loved.

If you are genuinely concerned that she's having other issues then drop her a call or text, why not, but try not to necessarily frame it as being concerned because she wanted to celebrate the dog's birthday. She is NBU to do that

MrsXx4 those photos!!! I'm done for.

seafoodeatit · 04/04/2017 14:13

yanbu but this may just be one of those things she enjoys? people love treating pets like babies, I just shrug now when I see people pushing cats in prams or carrying dogs around.

WizardOfToss · 04/04/2017 14:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThePiglet59 · 04/04/2017 14:15

"Her dog may come to understand birthdays too as being an exciting and special time with certain rituals to expect."

This thread is priceless!

YetAnotherSpartacus · 04/04/2017 14:15

Mrs4x4 - squeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Sounds excessive for a mere dog. For a cat, on the other hand, it does not come close to minimum expectations.

SillyLittleBiscuit · 04/04/2017 14:17

She might have just wanted a day off, it coincided with the dog's birthday so she thought she'd celebrate.

BellaGoth · 04/04/2017 14:17

Maybe she's struggling, or maybe this is her way of bringing a little joy to her life. She's not hurting anyone, the dog is probably very happy. Call her!

BorpBorpBorp · 04/04/2017 14:19

Seems perfectly normal to me, but I did just buy a birthday card for a teddy bear.

HazelBite · 04/04/2017 14:20

When my first marriage broke up my lovely Aunt gave me a kitten, that cat kept me going and was a lovely companion for me, I felt needed, loved and wanted.
I think its great that your friend has a dog, she probably tells the dog all of her "troubles" it's a lot easier than boring all your friends!
good for your friend, with the help of her doggy companion she will survive.

elevenswan · 04/04/2017 14:21

Does she have kids? Speaking as someone who doesn't but desperately wants them, pets can become a focus and a way to get all your mum-ness out. I don't think it's weird, I think it's often a necessity to keep you sane/less achingly jealous

JonesyAndTheSalad · 04/04/2017 14:21

I have two friends like this OP and I feel that they're happy so it doesn't matter.

Original poster

jdoe8 · 04/04/2017 14:21

Seems perfectly normal to me, but I did just buy a birthday card for a teddy bear.

Oh my, I hope you are joking

OP posts:

LordRothermereBlackshirtCunt · 04/04/2017 14:21

Sounds normal to me. My parents even buy my dog a card and present for his birthday. He is their granddog after all!

sparechange · 04/04/2017 14:23

I'm the admin for my dogs instagram account

You mock, but it has 3k followers in 3 months, and I get a couple of message a week offering me free dog stuff in return for posting pictures.

I think well over half the followers are other pet accounts, it's a very common thing to do!

TheWalkingTiger · 04/04/2017 14:23

I've got a teddy bear that buys us anniversary presents.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 04/04/2017 14:24

I bet her dog hated every minute of it. Dogs don't like hats do they?

Kiroro · 04/04/2017 14:24

Relatively normal, and pretty harmless!

Nice to have a day off and chill out with the dog anyway.

Kiroro · 04/04/2017 14:25

Do call her - and say "calling to wish [dog name] happy birthday, what a cutie!"

She will love it.

SpreadYourHappiness · 04/04/2017 14:26

Sounds normal to me. My parents even buy my dog a card and present for his birthday. He is their granddog after all!

Absolutely ridiculous.

frieda909 · 04/04/2017 14:27

If she's quite active on Instagram with lots of pics of her dog then this sounds like something she might have just done to get some good photos. It doesn't necessarily mean she's actually spending all day wearing the party hat and blowing the whistle things alone with her dog.

Couldn't hurt to just check in, though, and see how she's doing.

FerdinandsRevenge · 04/04/2017 14:28

If she doesn't have family she's probably got loads of holiday to use up. Why not a dog's birthday over any other random Tuesday?

FerdinandsRevenge · 04/04/2017 14:30