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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dog snatched babies sandwich

342 replies

IsithormonesoramIamadcow · 02/04/2017 20:40

AIBU to think that it's not unreasonable to ask someone to put their dog on a lead....

When it's just come over to a family sitting on a bench having a picnic and chomped the sandwich out of a 17month olds hand - the whole of DS arm was inside the dogs mouth although the dog didn't actually 'bite' him.

I jumped up, shouted at the dog and asked the owner to put him on a lead. Explained he had just taken my DS hand as well as the sandwich. Dog owner paid no attention until DH lost his shit and threatened to deal with the dog himself... by which time our lovely relaxing afternoon had evaporated. Am I supposed to just be glad that DS still has all his fingers?

I am fed up with people saying their badly behaved off lead dogs are 'really friendly'. How am I supposed to know which ones are and which ones aren't.

OP posts:
kali110 · 04/04/2017 13:09

Wow Beansonapost

Violetcharlotte · 04/04/2017 13:15

My reaction in this situation would have been to kick the dog in its throat or kill it... favouring the latter.... properly losing my shit.

Wow...not sure what to say to this.

tabulahrasa · 04/04/2017 13:44

"My reaction in this situation would have been to kick the dog in its throat or kill it... favouring the latter.... properly losing my shit."

Eh? You'd lose it enough to presumably beat a dog to death (I'm assuming you don't carry weapons) in front of your child????

Really????

Um, yeah, I suggest you carry on avoiding dogs and people tbh, that is not a normal reaction.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 04/04/2017 14:12

When everyone seems to have an anecdote of a vicious dog attack, I'm inclined to think those people are bull shitting.

Not really. It just disproves your point that dog attacks aren't more common than you think.

I'm not frightened of dogs. I adore them. In the last two years of doing the new school run route. I've had two different dogs go for me unprovoked out of the hundreds I've encountered.

You thinking it's bullshit doesn't mean it isn't true to those who have indeed experienced it.

kali110 · 04/04/2017 14:22

Even your dh wasn't pleaed, says a lot.
By all means you defend yourself, but kicking a dog in its throat or trying to kill it because it was nicking food Shock

Violetcharlotte · 04/04/2017 14:23

I have to say, reading some of the extreme reactions on here, I do wonder how some people manage to get through day to day life without being in a constant state of hysterics.

Ok, so a dog taking food from a child is certainly not ideal and it's annoying. A responsible dog owner should do their best to stop this sort of thing happening. However life's not ideal and stuff happens.

Shouldn't these sort of situations be an opportunity to show our DC's how to cope in a difficult situation?

You could react angrily, shout at the dog, kick the dog (or kill the dog as someone said?!) shout and swear at the owner, then complain about it for the next 2 weeks to anyone who'll listen.

Or you could say 'Oh that dog's taken your sandwich! How funny! Never mind, eh, he must have been really hungry.' etc

Surely teaching DC to be balanced and react with a degree of rationality is a far better life lesson?

Booboostwo · 04/04/2017 14:25

Wow Beans! What would you do to another child that bawled over your child, or bit him or hit him? Do you often feel like killing living beings with your bare hands?

CustardOmlet · 04/04/2017 14:25

But many of these "attacks" people are referencing are not attacks, they are dogs coming near and being inquizative and people being over dramatic. beaninapost seriously a dog came near you, and pp who had a dogs head in the prushchair, your child is only fearful because you taught it to be scared. There is a reason my children don't bat an eyelid at a dog, because I am calm and rational when a strange dog comes near, I either move myself between the dog and my child or turn the pushchair away.

CustardOmlet · 04/04/2017 14:25

Violetcharlotte exactly!

ThePiglet59 · 04/04/2017 14:27

People are being a little hard on the dog.

Perhaps it was upset as it was its birthday and nobody remembered and threw a party?

Has anybody considered that?

WateryTart · 04/04/2017 15:25

Or you could say 'Oh that dog's taken your sandwich! How funny! Never mind, eh, he must have been really hungry.'

Yes, really funny. Hmm

Most parents would be cross that anyone is stupid enough to have an out of control dog near children.

pennypickle · 04/04/2017 15:38

No dog should be allowed to take a sandwich from a small child - or anyone. I'm still 😂 at OP's claim that a Labrador "spat out" a peanut butter sandwich. Dogs absolutely love peanut butter!

I am very concerned that someone would kick a dog in the throats simply because it approached them tbh. No need for that! If the dog attacked a member of the family then by all means defend the family member. A dog gets kicked for being a dog? No way!

MadMags · 04/04/2017 15:42

The best way to ensure someone doesn't kick your dog in the throat is to make sure they don't have the opportunity to.

JaimeLannister · 04/04/2017 15:44

I had the opposite problem with my old dog. He was sat by my feet outside a shop when a toddler walking by gave him a sausage roll. He shoved it right at the dog's mouth and laughed so much when my dog ate it.

I wasn't expecting that!

I would be mortified if my dog stole food from someone. She is a golden retriever so very fond of food but we have done the kennel club bronze, silver and gold training classes and she does know the 'leave it' command. Even so she would still be on lead around a picnic!

Doowappydoo · 04/04/2017 16:04

No one wants to kick out or hurt a dog (not least because it might make the dog more aggressive) but if an unknown dog bounds up to your baby and grabs his arm in his mouth surely even the nuttiest dog owner could see how a parent may well react instinctively. See the pp above who kicked a husky when it ran up to her and her 4 week old.

What a lot of the posters seem to completely miss is that if a dog comes bounding up to you you don't know it - you don't know what it will do. If you have a baby or a small child with you then protective instincts kick in.

Dogs who can't be recalled shouldn't be off the lead in public. If your dog gets kicked because its not in control and it invades someone else's space and frightens them then that's your fault.

Original poster
IsithormonesoramIamadcow · 04/04/2017 17:11

Yes I was surprised that the dog didn't eat the sandwich. Might have been something to do with me leaping up and shouting at it. Perhaps it understood that this meant 'drop it' who knows? It also dropped DS's arm which was what I was trying to get it to do. That's the point it wasn't my dog. I had know way of knowing what it might do next. My only thought was to keep it away from my kids.

All I did was ask for it to be put on a lead... it's only when that was ignored/refused that DH got angry. I cannot accept the argument that our reaction was unprovoked.

OP posts:
Coloursthatweremyjoy · 04/04/2017 17:38

I have a labrador. All picnics are scrupulously policed! I have done a lot of training with the kennel club and I am pretty confident that he would not grab any food off anyone but hey hes a lab and I'm not taking chances!

When I took my toddler niece to a wetland centre she had a biscuit and one goose came up to her, bobbing it's head and being all cute while another came up behind her and nicked the biscuit. She was bewildered, I thought it was hysterical. Mind you hawian geese aren't know own for mauling people.

Katherine2626 · 04/04/2017 17:39

Dogs are hard wired to be scavengers - they will take food when they can. Dog owners who don't know this are idiots and shouldn't have a dog, and if you are in a park with families then keep the dog on a lead. Simple. Most dogs will try to be friendly - I have a large, gentle dog who doesn't jump up or lick, but if she leans on you she could push you over, and I am always mindful that a small child would probably be terrified if this happened. The trouble with dogs is invariably on the other end of the lead; whether they have hold of the end or not!

ChardonnayKnickertonSmythe · 04/04/2017 17:42

Not too sure about geese, they can be vicious.

My mother has scars from being in a scuffle with some geese when she was a child.

phoenixrose314 · 04/04/2017 17:43

I am a Labrador owner and yes they are greedy buggers - but my dog would never ever steal food from a person!! The owner is always the problem, not the dog, not the breed - train your damn dogs or keep them on a leash. End of.

vixen68 · 04/04/2017 17:47

I've had children and dogs at the same time. My children were told not to pet the dogs that they didn't know. As a responsible dog owner I wouldn't let my dogs off a lead in a place that wasn't a dog park. In this instance the fault is that of the dog owner for not having the dog on a lead, not the dog who was just following instinct and hasn't been trained properly. It's very good to know the little one wasn't hurt in this.

biilbosmum · 04/04/2017 17:53

My dog walks off lead, and I am constantly on high picnic alert. He is a greedy mutt and has in the past eaten a pasty from a workman's car (literally jumped through the window and raided it) which was parked on our drive while we had some work done. I made the guy a stack of cheese sandwiches as recompense. He also once ate a whole fruitcake at a family (our own family) picnic. These stories and more have given us endless laughs in the re-telling over the years.
Consequently though, when we're out and about I am uber vigilant and call him back when he looks like he's getting too close to a sandwich being waved in their air.
Children are tricky though. For every child who is scared of dogs and who you therefore need to avoid (my dog seems to sense this so does) there is a child or parent who do the stroking or chasing thing. Fortunately my dawg tolerates this. But there are mixed messages all round I feel

Craigie · 04/04/2017 18:00

I fucking hate dogs. Have never met a dog owner who didn't think their dog was wonderful & harmless, and I just think they're disgusting, slobbery, smelly & often dangerous.

ZigAZigAhh · 04/04/2017 18:03

beaninapost seriously a dog came near you, and pp who had a dogs head in the prushchair, your child is only fearful because you taught it to be scared. There is a reason my children don't bat an eyelid at a dog, because I am calm and rational when a strange dog comes near, I either move myself between the dog and my child or turn the pushchair away.

Custard, it's not always that simple.

When toddler DS was bowled over and snapped/barked at by an off-leash dog recently (as mentioned a few pages back), DH and I were very careful to react calmly and rationally. We explained to DS that the dog was just excited (despite all signs pointing to the fact that it wasn't, it was aggressive) and the dog didn't mean to scare him etc etc. We didn't raise our voices or shout at the owner, we just scooped DS up out of the way and moved away from the dog.

This had no effect whatsoever, DS is now petrified of dogs (to the point he refuses to go back to the park where it happened) and we are finding it really difficult to help him get his courage back. He used to absolutely love dogs so his fear has been brought about by this one incident.

Having parents who act calmly and rationally (which is bloody hard to do when you are internally raging) doesn't always counteract the fright a small child will get from an unwelcome and (to them) terrifying dog encounter.

BertrandRussell · 04/04/2017 18:06

2000 children were taken to hospital last year after dog bites...........