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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nursery reports that are flights of imagination

67 replies

SantanaLopez · 01/04/2017 19:45

The more I think about this, the crosser I get.

DD just turned four in February there. She is a very good and happy wee girl. She likes going to nursery, plays well, comes home covered in paint etc etc.

I just got her report back and it is all total shite. She can add and subtract in her head and is also beginning to blend.

This is total claptrap- especially as neither adding, subtracting nor blending has even been taught!

I found it vaguely amusing at first, but I really am a bit cross. DH says it's a nursery report, and not worth the paper it's written on, but it's the principle of the thing.

AIBU to ask for a meeting to discuss it?

OP posts:
Marcipex · 01/04/2017 20:43

Counting activities are often things like, we have six children in blue group, how many plates for snack time, how many cups do we need etc.
You wouldn't see that set up, but it would still be happening regularly.

Marcipex · 01/04/2017 20:45

Cross posting, sorry.

muckypup73 · 01/04/2017 20:49

Just to say as well Op,if your child is not doing phonics then she will not be blending, Blending is joinging the sounds together to try and make a word.

muckypup73 · 01/04/2017 20:50

Soory joining.

amysmummy12345 · 01/04/2017 20:53

If you say c-a-t and she says cat then she can orally blend.

Original poster
SantanaLopez · 01/04/2017 20:54

Blending is joinging the sounds together to try and make a word

I know. I also know that she is a bit ropey on this still.

Counting activities are often things like, we have six children in blue group, how many plates for snack time, how many cups do we need etc.

I do all of this at home too. She has twin siblings so lots of opportunities to count out for them and her.

I know she cannot do the things in this report. I am 100% convinced of it.

OP posts:
Original poster
SantanaLopez · 01/04/2017 20:55

If you say c-a-t and she says cat then she can orally blend

She can with certain words but not others. She's better at orally blending words with long first letters (is there a technical term?) like m.

OP posts:
Quartz2208 · 01/04/2017 20:57

Its a difficult one because what they say she can do is perfectly normal (I just tried what is 1 plus 1 and 2 plus 1 with DS - 4+2 is a rather high amount to start with) and ask him what c a t spelt and he said cat so it seems perfectly normal to be able to do - and I know from speaking to DS they do a lot more than it appears.

What the issue appears to be is you think its rubbish and dont teach them - how do you know that?

ChocChocPorridge · 01/04/2017 20:58

TBH, I enjoy reading nursery reports just because they're always so nice - yours are perhaps a little too nice. I'm not sure I'd worry too much at 4.

Mine are more of the level of 'can sometimes recognise colours/shapes/numbers' when I know full well he completely can, but doesn't like it when people try to get him to demonstrate his knowledge.. much like when the HV got worried that DS1 didn't have a pincer grip (because he wasn't interested in her raisins) and didn't seem to be able to hear correctly (when he ignored her shaking her keys.. he was 2.5 and not interested in keys). Kids are little toads when they want to be.

amysmummy12345 · 01/04/2017 21:04

Some softer initial consonants seem to naturally blend into the medial sound within words, so that could be why she's more able to blend those sorts of words. Hard sounds like "c" "d" etc require a slight pause when sounding out, whereas soft sounds like "m" and "s" can lead straight onto the next sound without a break (hope that makes sense)?

IvyLeagueUnderTheSea · 01/04/2017 21:06

Do you have an online learning journey for her?
I'm not sure of the system in Scotland but in England they should be able to prove that she can do these things. There should be observations of these activities.

amysmummy12345 · 01/04/2017 21:06

Incidentally my three year old DD orally blended the word "nugget" the other day, I had no idea the little monkey could do that!

VladmirsPoutine · 01/04/2017 21:11

I think whilst you may have cause for concern regarding a bullshit report just wait until secondary school when similar-abled groups receive the same report you might be over-reacting.

Kids can't always contextualise. My niece, as a PP pointed out, can work out that if she's eating with her 2 aunts and mum, she'd need to put out 4 plates. If I asked her what 2+1+1 equalled she'd look at me like I had 4 heads.

aaahhhBump · 01/04/2017 21:13

It's more likely the adding and subtracting is done as part of a game or story. The recognising when you share things out. Bob has 3 apples gives one to Jill. How many apples does Bob have rather than addition. Lots of kids are still figuring out that the symble 4 is four.

Original poster
SantanaLopez · 01/04/2017 21:23

What the issue appears to be is you think its rubbish and dont teach them - how do you know that?

Because she was born after Dec 31, I can defer her start to school. They could not understand why I would do that and warned me she would be bored because they don't teach phonics or numeracy. So why are they now telling me that she can blend simple words, form letters correctly and perform addition and subtraction to 10 in her head?!

OP posts:
EdenX · 01/04/2017 21:41

I think they mean they will not be teaching literacy and numeracy to the same level as a more formal school class led by a qualified teacher.

Quartz2208 · 01/04/2017 22:10

Ok so you want to defer her starting school and think they have made up this report to stop you doing that?

Surely the money re logical answer is that they are saying there teaching is not as i depth as tha school and your daughter will be ready to start school and the more In depth learning.

The question is why to you nit think her ready?

Original poster
SantanaLopez · 01/04/2017 22:39

I don't know what they are doing.

I just know that they have given me a report full of things my DD cannot do.

I think she could cope fine with P1 just now, but she'll cope better a year down the line. Thankfully we have the choice here.

OP posts:
Qvar · 01/04/2017 22:49

Have they said she "can" or that she "has been learning to"? Two very different things

5moreminutes · 01/04/2017 22:51

Go in and talk to them. Say you're suprised but obviously don't be confrontational.

It may be they are going to struggle for enough places if children are held back so they are being excessively encouraging about sending them on, or it may be a cut and paste error, or it maybe she really does stuff at nursery she won't reproduce at home for some reason... Really you have to go in and see otherwise people who definitely don't know your child are just sharing their point of view based on their own back story or baggage or agenda, not your child Wink

Arrange an informal meeting because you are a little surprised about her report, be nice, get to the bottom of it.

Good luck!

TinselTwins · 01/04/2017 22:56

her nursery report has FA to do with whether you defer or not. You don't need them to say she's behind if you wanna defer. Just defer.

5moreminutes · 01/04/2017 22:57

We're abroad in a country where you can also defer, and there do appear to have been cases of parents encouraged to defer unnecessarily where the one form entry village school all the kids automatically go to is going to have a very large class, and encouraged not to where the school class is in danger of not making viable numbers or where there is a bulge year of almost 3 year olds needing places at the one and only Kindergarten (ages 3-6/7)... They do have the kids best interests at heart as a group, but sometimes the decision for an individual seems to have been made somewhat for the greater rather than individual good... No harm done but not always absolutely ideal...

puglife15 · 01/04/2017 23:21

Er, it's preschool. Surely they learn phonics and counting at actual school??

Quartz2208 · 02/04/2017 07:59

Talk to them then you clearly don't like the report so get there opinion and ask re holding back, holding back should be about ability and maturity not just age which is arbitrary

EdenX · 02/04/2017 09:14

Maths and literacy are both on the preschool curriculum pug.

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