How would you feel about this?

[justwondering85]

I had a baby yesterday by c section. My husband dealt with the phone calls to my mum and his mum whilst I was in recovery. My mum wanted to come up to visit straight away but we asked for no visitors for a day to allow me recover and establish breast feeding. My husband explained this and his mum was understanding as she'd had a section. Since I've had my baby girl I've had messages from my husbands family, friends, work colleagues my aunt, uncle and cousins but my own dad and brother have not even sent me a message to say congratulations. AIBU to be slightly miffed or is it just because some men don't think of these things?

Sadly some men seem to think they're 'covered' by their women - you know the individuals involved so you're probably the best judge.

Have you messaged them to let them know, and they haven't replied? Or were you expecting they'd hear from someone else?

They will have assumed your dm is the messenger. .

Are your parents together? If so, my dad would never have dreamt of sending a message separate to my mum and I wouldn't expect it. In fact, if they started sending separate congratulations I would worry about what was going on with them!

My dp would probably not send a message if he knew I had as he thinks that's enough, even for his own family members!

Although when I had ds2 my bil didn't contact me for a good few days because no one had told him and I presumed my sister or mum would have or even his kids but nope he had no idea until he saw the announcement on Fb

Congratulations
Agree with others they probably left it to your mum

Congratulations on your baby, hope you are both well.

Your dh didn't call your dad or brother separately to inform them so why would they think they needed to message separately? They've probably just assumed your mum has it covered, doesn't mean they don't care

My dad didn't get in touch to personally express his approval of my new baby; my mum passed on his best wishes and it never occurred to me to get annoyed at that come to think of it, my grandfather never personally got in touch either.

Sorry OP, not really seeing the issue! I think you just want everyone to come and marvel at the baby, which is a perfectly normal and understandable response (I felt like that too). However, please don't get grumpy at family for not paying you as much attention as you feel is your due. They haven't done anything wrong!

Congratulations on your new baby

They may be thinking they are doing as you asked, be left alone to recover and establish breastfeeding. They may assume you are too tired to be bothered with your phone. Don't worry about it, sounds like they may be bounding through the door with your mum to see you tomorrow. Congratulations and enjoy your baby