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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that packed lunch containing a cold happy meal could be due to poverty?

466 replies

blubberball · 29/03/2017 09:55

I saw on the news the other day, a story about school packed lunches. At one school, they looked in a child's lunchbox, and found a cold happy meal. People have obviously been angered by that, and are accusing the parents of being lazy. The first thought that came to my mind was that they couldn't afford to waste the food from the day before. I know that the particular primary school they looked at is in a very poor area. I just felt sorry for them.

OP posts:
muttrat · 29/03/2017 12:37

If I'm not mistaken, that story was from a private school.

That's hilarious if so,given the holier than thou attitudes on this thread

MySordidCakeSecret · 29/03/2017 12:37

yanbu. Lots of ignorant people on this thread regarding poverty.

MsPonder · 29/03/2017 12:38

Could the child not have just asked for it to be in their packed lunch?
My daughter has often taken cold pizza or something from the night before because she has asked to...if she wants it at least I know she will eat it!

LouKout · 29/03/2017 12:38

I didn't read past the shocked faces at the cold hot dog.

What sheltered lives people must live.

MadMags · 29/03/2017 12:39

As I said, I've had a look on the McD's website and from what I can see the wrap, milk, carrot sticks and fruit bag add up to more calories.

If I'm mistaken, fair enough. If not, then the calorie argument is a bit of a straw man.

muttrat · 29/03/2017 12:40

Cold hot dogs are fucking horrible, I fell sorry for you if that's all your child will eat but it's not a sheltered life that makes me boak at the idea of liquidised arse holes in a bun

BarbarianMum · 29/03/2017 12:41

Surely any family who could only afford a Happy Meal a day for their child would have access to free school meals, and quite likely a food bank? In fact, if the only food my child got all day was one Happy Meal I'd tell social services to take them into care rather than starve them. Not buying it.

Sallysadlyseescertainty · 29/03/2017 12:42

How ignorant and self-righteous some posters on here are.

LouKout · 29/03/2017 12:43

Yes social services will really take a child into care for being served a happy meal

sadsquid · 29/03/2017 12:44

if the only food my child got all day was one Happy Meal I'd tell social services to take them into care rather than starve them

I'm sorry, is this for real? You think being taken into the care system and away from the family you know and love is better than the horrors of a cold cheeseburger?

RainbowChasing · 29/03/2017 12:45

It could be due to poverty but in my experience the kids who come from poor families generally have decent lunches and it's the better off families that would do this sort of thing. Not always, but often. Lazy parenting causes a lot of the problems in today's schools/society. I've seen some dreadful lunches provided by educated, well off people who simply didn't have time for their children due to work, gym and socialising "commitments".

Vandree · 29/03/2017 12:45

Oh ffs, I never said the person looked it up did I? I did because someone mentioned calorie content and who figured the wrap had loads of calories. 230 calories isnt loads, 30 calories for carrots isn't either. Took me two seconds.

In a lot of emergency accommodation in hotels you get meals provided, my example didn't so they had to give out meal vouchers. Think about why it was a meal voucher and not just cash. Also supermarket vouchers would be given to someone with a home or a shared kitchen. They had neither. So fast food meal voucher. I never said it was everyday, or everymeal but it happened and its real life. It was just one example of why there may be a burger meal in a lunchbox. In fairness if my child didnt eat their frozen pizza at dinner they would eat it for lunch cold because they want to. Anyway, talking bollox I am not thanks

MadMags · 29/03/2017 12:45

Vandree in fairness, there are certain foods that she could have bought daily and kept with her, if she'd wanted to.

It's not ideal, of course. I'm in Ireland and am well aware of our housing crisis.

I'm also aware that unfortunately a lot of the people who find themselves in this position are uneducated from disadvantaged socio-economic backgrounds and the chances are that even in their own homes. they still wouldn't have a brilliant diet for their dc.

muttrat · 29/03/2017 12:45

OK even I don't think that!

MadMags · 29/03/2017 12:48

I did because someone mentioned calorie content and who figured the wrap had loads of calories. 230 calories isnt loads, 30 calories for carrots isn't either. Took me two seconds.

I'm not sure if you're just deliberately ignoring what I actually said or not, but again, I added up the calories in EVERYTHING I listed versus the burger and chips in the lunchbox.

Not sure how I can make that any clearer.

BorpBorpBorp · 29/03/2017 12:48

Funnyonion17 Plus you'd need to buy foil or sandwich bags to put the sandwiches in. You'll also need access to a fridge and a clean surface to make sandwiches on, and a knife to spread the cheese spread, and a spoon for the yoghurt, and washing up liquid and access to a clean sink to wash up afterwards. If you've had to do a moonlight flit with the kids from an abusive partner, you'll need to buy a lunch box too. My point is (as many others have pointed out) that a child bringing a cold burger for lunch isn't necessarily due to parental ignorance or laziness.

MadMags · 29/03/2017 12:49

muttrat that's honestly not a judgement.

I come from that type of area. I grew up around this. I have no idea why my mum and dad were different.

I'll admit my only real knowledge is anecdotal, though so I certainly don't claim it's every single person from a deprived area, and nor would I!

Plus, I am well aware that lazy parenting is not the sin of the poor, so before anyone berates me, that's not what I meant.

fernanie · 29/03/2017 12:49

In fact, if the only food my child got all day was one Happy Meal I'd tell social services to take them into care rather than starve them.

Christ. This might be the most middle-class, sheltered thing I've read on MN thus far. Do you really think avoiding the odd happy meal is a legitimate reason to remove a child from their parents and place them with strangers or in some kind of institution? Do you have any idea how traumatising that is for a child? But I suppose it worth all those feelings of abandonment if the child gets to eat quinoa and avocados all day instead of white bread and shit quality meat.

Vandree · 29/03/2017 12:51

Of course there were days when she had money she got some snacks in if she could. But that could be on a thursday and friday they had extra money and then it was eaten up by other things and a meal voucher was all thats left. I said I was pretty sure my dn had a happymeal in the lunch box at least once and I wouldn't judge my SIL for it because she was doing all she could with the means she had.

Of course you can go to a market and aldi and buy bits but thats only if you had the funds and the means to do so. Not everyone does.

BarbarianMum · 29/03/2017 12:52

Social services will take your child into care if you insist on it. It's very distressing but it can be done. If your school age child only receives the calorific equivalent of one Happy Meal a day they will starve to death. That's a fact. Would you truely just sit and watch that happen?

Vandree · 29/03/2017 12:53

Take the milk out of the calculation. Simple really. Burger and chips 530 calories, wrap and carrots 270 calories. Add milk to both and thats another 120 calories. Not ignoring anything you said.

LouKout · 29/03/2017 12:53

Noone knows the child only had a happy meal all day though

badger2005 · 29/03/2017 12:55

If you just have a voucher for a fast food place, then of course you have to get something from there.

But if you can get to a supermarket, then you can get other stuff that you don't really need any utensils to prepare. I have made my dc a ham sandwich + apple lunch straight from the supermarket just kind of on my lap, at a bus shelter, or wherever.

I'm totally not pretending to understand poverty: my situations were more like "didn't realise we'd still be out, need to get some lunch" - not an ongoing thing. I get the idea that day in day out this would get pretty depressing. There are plenty of reasons to prefer a Happy Meal. I just think that if you have access to a supermarket, and the money rather than a specific macdonalds voucher, then this option is open to you. Not that it is necessarily the right option to choose.

On the other hand, I must be one of the few people on this thread that think a cold MD meal is not that bad. Sometimes I have a crappy lunch myself. Yesterday I ate a load of crackers with butter and called that lunch. Not very nutritious! Sometimes I eat a frozen chip before I put the chips in the oven, so I imagine I'd be happy enough to eat some cold ones.

MadMags · 29/03/2017 12:55

The point being that if this was a happy meal, they could have chosen to provide milk with the calcium and all those sought after calories. Along with everything else I listed.

Why would you take the milk out of the calculation? Why would you not choose the milk as the best of the bunch if you were looking to increase calories in a healthy way, if providing a happy meal was absolutely, categorically, your only option?

Butteredparsnip1ps · 29/03/2017 12:57

I'm not defending it as a healthy choice but I am willing to admit that my DC like wraps with chicken nuggets, mayo and lettuce and have very occasionally taken in cold Pizza for lunch. So I suppose I could be that parent.

FWIW DD only takes a packed lunch once a week and so I am fairly relaxed about it's contents. It's one meal out of 21 in a week.

As I say - a cold happy meal doesn't sound particularly healthy, but it's just a snapshot. What matters is what the child is eating across the whole week.