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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to secretly take baby gifts back for a refund?

68 replies

Wibblewobbles · 18/03/2017 21:16

We have SO much baby stuff from when my toddler was younger, I literally kept everything as it was all perfectly good still.

I'm due in a couple of months and a friend brought round some brand new multipacks of things like vests and babygrows she's picked up from Tesco, ASDA etc. I've just got all our old baby stuff down from the loft and we literally have everything we need already, it seems like such a waste. Another family member has bought us some bibs, we must have about 50 bibs already from the first baby which were hardly used as he wasn't that dribbly/sicky and I preferred muslin cloths anyway.

I feel guilty and wasteful opening these packs of new stuff and using them once at most because we have so much already, plus I find having more to use just generates more washing as you end up just getting more and more clean stuff out instead of washing them. But I feel guilty donating or selling the gifts, at least if I got a refund I could get something else for the baby at some point that is actually needed?

Would the shops even give refunds for this stuff without a receipt?

OP posts:
Costalot1 · 18/03/2017 22:36

I took virtually everything back and exchanged for things I preferred. Most things were from next or m&s who have a good returns policy.

Original poster
Wibblewobbles · 18/03/2017 22:37

Patriciathestripper1 I did consider that option. I'm not sure though, seems wasteful to open new stuff when I already have enough perfectly good stuff that was probably only worn once or twice the first time round. I guess it feels a bit like opening a new carton of juice when you already have one open that's almost full still...!

I don't think she'd notice whether I dressed the baby in her gifts or not as they're mainly things like vests. I'm sure there is one pack I'd keep so I wouldn't be ditching the whole lot. I am leaning towards the exchange option as that still keeps the spirit of the gift alive but converts it into something that will actually be used and enjoyed rather than guiltily opened, only worn once and then guiltily discarded!

OP posts:
ILikeGreenBananas · 18/03/2017 22:38

Personally, I would donate them to your local women's shelter. Or a charity of your choice.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 18/03/2017 22:40

I would exchange it. I've done that with plenty of presents and haven't had the reciept. Never had a shop say no as I'm only looking for an exchange.

Original poster
Wibblewobbles · 18/03/2017 22:42

HarryPottersMagicWand How does it work, do you pick something you want first and then go and exchange the goods, or do you exchange first for a credit note? (I don't know as in the past I've only ever exchanged faulty goods)

OP posts:
fusspot66 · 18/03/2017 22:42

Swap them for a couple of sizes up. I found babygrows got very grey and bobbly once DC were crawling/on the floor and weren't suitable to.hand on so much.

Mrsmadevans · 18/03/2017 22:43

Me too that is a great idea , when a girl in work had her baby, we all bought the baby an outfit or two . It was unfortunate that I saw her taking the lot back for a refund and she then proceeded to buy their clothes exclusively from Maman Bebe after they were 'chosen' to be models for the catalogue , they were paid with a voucher for a third off the clothes. Needless to say I have completely gone off the snobby little madam , different scenario I know op but I was gutted at the time it felt like a right slap in the face as if we were not good enough and neither were our presents.

IgnoreMeEveryOtherReindeerDoes · 18/03/2017 22:45

Exchange them for something else, I'd prefer that rather than you not using them or regifting them.

I make a point now of including a gift receipt, even my own mother recently I don't mind if she exchanges it for something else, I'd be more bothered that it wasn't used or you gave it away, if I'd made the effort to go buy you something

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/03/2017 22:49

I agree that if you dont need them, and dont need the money/credit then I would donate them to a refuge or ask your local food bank if they can help you rehome them.

lazyarse123 · 18/03/2017 22:49

I think pp have a great idea, keep the new and donate the used clothes to a refuge then everybody's happy.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 18/03/2017 22:51

I go in with the item, say it was a gift that we already have and can we exchange, they always say yes then keep it at customer services whilst I go and look for something else.

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/03/2017 22:52

If you are exchanging then go to the customer service desk first, but bear in mind that you will only get a gift card for what the items are priced at on the day you return them, as without receipt you cant prove what they cost.

Why cant you ask her if you can have the receipt so you can change them for the next size up or something?

Lindy2 · 18/03/2017 22:58

I changed quite a lot of things. We were given loads of 3 - 6 months clothes. Way more than we could use. I exchanged some of the things for bigger sizes. Where I could I got the same item but just in bigger size.
I think the people who gave the gift would rather you had something you could use than see it go to waste.

JonesyAndTheSalad · 18/03/2017 22:59

If she's got no kids she's going to wonder why you're not putting the things on your baby OP.

You can't give them back to the shop or donate them. You need to try to use them at least once and then donate. And send her pics too.

ItsOooohSoQuiet · 18/03/2017 23:02

how does it work, do you pick something you want first and then go and exchange the goods, or do you exchange first for a credit note?

Depends where you shop. Some places won't give a credit note/gift card if you don't have a recipe (e.g. Debenhams). It's worth going to the till first to check the value of the goods.

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 18/03/2017 23:17

We had to exchange quite a lot of things as DS1 was a long baby that bypassed newborn and went straight into 0-3m. DS2 only managed 2 weeks in newborn.

Exchange to get something that's practical for your needs.

hollinhurst84 · 18/03/2017 23:19

Gah now I'm worrying about a gift!
Would you appreciate a neutral, beautifully done handmade patchwork blanket? As in cot/baby size but design so can be used for years and years

Lindy2 · 18/03/2017 23:46

We were given a lovely home made blanket hollinhurst. We treasure it. Yours sounds lovely.
I appreciate all gifts but sometimes 45 babygrows in the same size is a bit too much. 😁

redshoeblueshoe · 18/03/2017 23:59

hollinhurst that sounds lovely. OP I'm sure your friend won't mind you exchanging stuff.

3boys3dogshelp · 19/03/2017 00:19

Id exchange most of it but try to keep something so that she can see baby wearing it. I tried to exchange for a bigger size of I could when I had too many outfits in newborn sizes. I never had a problem anywhere - most shops seem to be more relaxed about baby clothes.
Nashanoo that's really sad. My dm was really hurt when sil took back everything she had bought for dn (including toys Hmm). She definitely noticed even though they lived quite far apart but never mentioned it to sil as she didn't want to cause a row. She did stop putting any effort into presents for my dns though, and never bought extra gifts as she felt she was wasting her money. now sil buys dn something from Amazon using dm's account each birthday and Christmas.

IgnoreMeEveryOtherReindeerDoes · 19/03/2017 00:26

@hollihurst I would of loved that, I did ask for one but got a shop brought one instead. I still have DD homemade crochet one 20 yrs later.

hollinhurst84 · 19/03/2017 00:51

This is the patterned fabric and will be chocolate brown plain squares too and cream ones

to secretly take baby gifts back for a refund?
chanie44 · 19/03/2017 07:31

I exchanged quite a few items we were given for the children. Sometimes it was because we had enough items in a particular size or that the items would fit during the wrong season (eg a wooly jumper which would fit during the summer months).

Some shops are better than others about exchanging. My local sainsburys won't let you exchange without a receipt, even if you just want another size. Asda are fine.

Cuppaoftea · 19/03/2017 07:43

Like pp have said I would definitely use the new clothes from your friend and donate some of the items you've kept.

KateDaniels2 · 19/03/2017 07:51

I would look at all your stuff and donate some to womens shelters or charities collecting for refugees.

Then non is going to waste