To not address my body dismorphia?

[Overweightbutfeelinggreat]

Okay so -
I'm 5ft 4 and my BMI is 30, waist size 30" and I wear a size 12/14 on top and a 14/16 on bottom. This is obese.
During teen years I struggled with binge eating, starving myself and bulimia but for the last 7 years have not had any of these issues.
I can see there is a clear difference between the size of me and my size 8 friends when I look at a photo but in my head, when I look in the mirror I can barely see the difference.
In shops I buy clothes without trying them on and am then surprised when they don't fit me when I get home.
I love food. I make huge effort with dinners and enjoy eating out.
My DP is a very lean, tall person as are our children.
Earlier this morning I was eating eggs benedict and he questioned my portion and said 'I don't think you need quite that much' which lead us onto a conversation where he completely doesn't understand that I am comfortable with my weight gain and actually doesn't understand that I don't particularly have a desire to change it (he's very active)
Should I be addressing my size? Or my view of myself?

I think the number one thing of importance is you just had a baby. Number two is being free of disoredered eating.

But personally i worry with my excess weight about the increased risk of cancer. I want to have as long, healthy a life as possible. I don't think people stop enough to consider just how bad for your health being overweight is.

Doesn't mean you have to diet but you should be taking steps to be the healthiest you can be. We all should. Mental health is part of that though.

I bet you have dropped quite a lot of weight. Ignoring the BMI , a 30 inch waist is fine ! There is a way of working out waist size to hip ratio which is better than BMI.

@AreYouFree ... tbh many eating disorders actually stem from a love of food ( inc. Anorexia and Bulimia) this is part of the reason for the obsessive behaviour and choosing to focus it onto food.
OP - I think maybe instead of tackling any eating problems in the mindset of 'should I diet' i think just try to be more mindful .. just switch to skim milk and only have one choc bar or crisps once a day - little things. Then focus on exercise as a way to improve your health.
Honestly I think i'd much rather someone was happy and obese than unhappy but healthy in body.

Oh and a 30 inch waist seems quite small!

But it's very much a love-hate relationship. Lots of guilt involved. I don't get that from the OPs post, she sounds happy with how she is right now, so i don't see a problem.

I'm 5'4 and was a similar weight to you after each child, it naturally decreased over a year and I'm roughly a size 12 now. I never weigh myself either! You sound well balanced and healthy in mind, and your baby weight will soon come off if you're active and don't eat crap. If I were you I'd ignore the DH!

The dr on This Morning last week said waist measurement is a more important indicator of fatness (my words) than BMI and women shouldn't have a waist measuring more than 30 inches.

Think the diabetes UK website / measure says that "waist" should be the fattest bit.

My BMI is 24 but my stomach measurement is well over 30 - the slimmer, upper part of my waist is smaller.

Just been on the diabetes website and it said 35 inches .. which I did think was a lot.

The ' waist' is the midpoint between your bottom rib and hip bone. In my case, that is definitely what I would think of as my waist.

So not round the navel?

Sorry for the derail! Perhaps will start a new thread on it.

oooo...! my navel IS halfway between my rib and my hipbone. Is that not normal??!! I have very little of me between these tow points. Think the term is 'short waisted'....

Waist just means the smallest part of your middle - where it curves in - if you do not have a definitive 'waist' then do between rib and belly button