To think dd doesn't want me

[esmaesmomma]

I have a 9 almost 10 month old dd. Since day one I have done about 80% of what needs doing for her as her father works ft. I play with her, talk to her and sing to her. I cuddle with her every day but just lately it doesn't seem to be me that she wants.

If my dp picks her up and then passes her to me she will cry her eyes out and reach out for him. We went to my little cousins birthday party last night (5-7) there wasn't too many people there my dp arrived a little later as he was with my dad. Dd was all for me wanted me to sit and play with her and wouldn't let me leave her side when dp showed up it was a different story she actually even cried if I came anywhere near her and dp. It feels so horrible I find myself feeling a bit jealous and sad which I know is just me being stupid. Me and dp have a good relationship and he does help when he isn't working he keeps trying to reassure me saying it's because dd hasn't been too well with a cold recently but if anything I would of thought that would make her want me more. It's not like I have recently starting going to work or leaving her on a regular basis I am a sahm.

Anyone else had this happen to them? What did you do?

I don't want to make it a competition and I am really glad she loves her daddy so much but I just wish she would still want me too.

Join in with her. Get excited about Daddy coming home, whoop, clap when he walks in (warn him first!); get him to do group hugs. If she's somewhere with you and you know Daddy is joining you, make a big deal of it... 'where's Daddy..... oooh he's here!!' Then guide her toward him with your hand. This way it will be a proactive process on your part and the resentment will hopefully ebb. Get your DH to show excitement when you enter a room too!

Most children do this, so try your best to turn it into a family positive!

(I speak as the parent of an adoptive child with attachment, as well as a birth child who was all about his dad, so I'm not as over the top Pollyanna as I might appear )

• attachment disorder

Buttercup the baby isn't picking up on anything...it's totally normal and very common for babies to do this.

Don't worry OP, she'll grow out of it. As painful as it is try to see the positives of being able to have a break while DD enjoys time with her dad. She doesn't see him as much as you and it's important she develops a strong bond with him.

Oh yes, I remember that well. My DTDs went through that as well. It hurts so much at the time. If it's any consolation, now that they're 8, they often whisper to me that I mustn't tell Dad, but they love me more than they love him. in all fairness though, he's a complete asshole