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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Breathtakingly grabby - money/health related

10 replies

disappearingfish · 12/03/2017 17:50

BIL needs an operation for a condition that's not life threatening but is causing him a lot of inconvenience and distress.

The NHS has told him he will be waiting 3-4 months.

BIL and SIL have decided to pay £9k to go private. Except that they have now accepted an offer from a neighbour, who is a very recent acquaintance, to pay for the op.

Neighbour is wealthy and has no family.

BIL and SIL have plenty of money. They can afford it by cashing in shares, or dipping into other savings. Their life will in no way be affected by this bill.

AIBU to think that it's bizarre behaviour to accept money from a virtual stranger? (And yes, I know it's none of my business)

OP posts:
shaggedthruahedgebackwards · 12/03/2017 17:54

It does sound odd without knowing the background of how the offer to pay by the neighbour came about and I certainly wouldn't feel comfortable accepting such an offer myself but if both parties seem happy with the arrangement then it isn't really anyone else's business

Tenpastlate · 12/03/2017 17:54

I know somebody who accepted a similar offer in similar circumstances.
Since picking my jaw up from the floor, I have lost all respect for them.

disappearingfish · 12/03/2017 17:56

SIL tells EVERYONE EVERYTHING about her life and BIL's. She very much draws everyone into her dramas. Neighbour had some experience with the same condition so that's how the conversation started apparently.

OP posts:
WankingMonkey · 12/03/2017 18:28

Bloody hell. Where do these people live who throw thousands around to people they barely know? Could do with moving there tbh. My neighbour gave me a death stare a few days back as I asked her if she had a teabag until I went to the bloody shop Hmm

CurlyBlueberry · 12/03/2017 18:35

I dunno. The neighbour offered, and even if he/she reneges on the agreement and doesn't pay up, BIL can afford to cover the cost. Neighbour is wealthy and has no relatives, has had experience of the condition and wanted to help. So why not?

disappearingfish · 12/03/2017 23:20

MonkeyGrin

I'm staying out of it IRL.

ILs are pleading poverty while buying a new car, booking an expensive holiday and replacing the conservatory on their house. How they can look their neighbour in the eye I will never know.

This is how wealthy people stay wealthy, they pretend they don't have any money.

OP posts:
WayfaringStranger · 12/03/2017 23:23

Why do people never offer to give me money?! :(

chitofftheshovel · 12/03/2017 23:27

I have zero respect for people who take other people's money like this. I think often there has been manipulation of a vulnerable person.

ButtercupChain · 12/03/2017 23:27

They should be ashamed of themselves taking money from this neighbour who is probably lonely and trying to make friends/make people like them. I sincerely hope that the bank question this transaction when said neighbour tries to withdraw or transfer the money, and do their best to stop it.

None of this sits well with me tbh. Your BIL and SIL sounds very grabby and manipulative. Why even TELL this neighbour about the money they need? Very suspicious imo.

MrsMcMoo · 12/03/2017 23:59

Super weird. People are weird though.

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