To not understand name changing for subsequent marriages?

[Themoonthestars]

I know it's absolutely none of my business, and I'd never dream of voicing my opinion in real life, but I do wonder why women bother changing their name again when they've been married 2, 3 times.

Although I didn't change my own name, I can understand people keeping the tradition when it's a first marriage or a marriage in which you're going to have children as they want everyone to have the same name.

I know a few women who've remarried and even married for a third time in their 50s, their children have their other name, and the woman is on her third surname. I know someone who's changed her name 4 times.

Each to their own and I know it's none of my business but I cant help wondering.

3rd marriage and 3rd name change for me. I'd never have wanted to keep my previous name when I finally managed to end a very unhappy marriage. Couldn't be happier now though!

My mum kept her married name after my parents divorced because she's lived and worked in the same village for 20 years as Mrs Jones (example) so it would be a pain to change back to Ms Smith. She does quite strongly insist on Ms rather than Mrs though. She and her partner aren't married, I don't know if she would take his name. Neither her maiden name or married name are unusual or particularly special, nor is her current partners name.

I run Brownies and plenty of my Brownie's mums have different names to their DD, it's no longer remarkable as it might've been a generation ago.

Of course women are going to keep changing their names.

They're hardly going to want Husband One's name while married to Husband Two.

Kind of defeats that whole argument of wanting to have the same name as their kids, though.

People who marry more than once tend to me more romantic I guess, and this probably fits in with that. I didnt change my name with my dh (1st husband) - wouldn't consider it.

I don't know. You do change your attitude to these things as life goes on.

I didn't change my name when we married, but we gave our DC DH's surname. We have since discussed it, and DH says he now wishes he had taken my surname, and that we had given the DC my surname. (My name is a plain, solid name; his has bad memories for him.)

But this was after we had been married for about 15 years.

So, someone might take their first DH's surname, but have changed their attitude to taking any DH's surname by the time they married again. It wouldn't be a slight to the second husband, just a change in opinion.

Still happily in a first marriage but...

Was happy to take DH's name. As a unit we all have the same name.

If we did divorce, I'm not sure that I'd want to revert back to my maiden name. It's a significant proportion of my life ago, and my life has changed since I bore that name. I'd be likely to retain it for simplicity for the DCs.

In the event of a further marriage, I'd probably change name rather than continuing to have the name of my first marriage.

As life goes on, I get more remote from my maiden name and less likely to use it again.

If you have done it for the first marriage then surely you need to do it for the second? Otherwise it makes it seem like the second is less important?
I think this is true. DH and his exW had double-barrelled surname. If he had refused to do the same when marrying me, I would wonder whether he thought our marriage was less important. In the end we didn't double-barrel (because they both alliterate and rhyme) but that was a joint decision.