My son doesn't seem to like me

[stressteddy]

I have a 21 month old son who has never been particularly bothered if I am around or not. I am a full time mum and know that other people have novelty value. I am finding this more and more upsetting as he doesn't even wnat me in the room with him and his father sometimes. I adore him and would do anything for him. I always thought a child wanted their mother when they were poorly, but he never has. He always wants his daddy. I can admit that I am a little envious of their relationship but it is the fact that he rejects me so much I can't stand. Please help me as I am feeling like a complete failure

stress - it is very normal to be over worried as a mum . Your son sounds like a happy chap, it is very healthy and normal too to sometimes prefer one parent over the other. I bet you he will go through different phases, sometimes he will prefer you other times daddy, don't worry

When my ds was about 3, he gazed into my eyes and said "I love you Mummy" Before I could reply he went on "but I love Daddy, Gracie and the kittens more" He's now 6 and I think the kittens and I have swapped places - probably because they are now grown up cats and therefore less fun than they were - but daddy is still definitely his parent of choice!

My DD1 was the same, every morning daddy left for work she would stand at the door and cry for daddy, every day for 2 years, then when she turned 4 she suddenly decided mummy wasnt so bad after all and now she is 5 and quite often wants me over daddy and is pretty much a 50/50 split, I know exactly how you feel and dont feel like a failure its only because he feels so secure with you that he prefers his father.

The only advice I can give you is to not seek his affection and let go a bit, the more I wanted my DD1 to want me, the further she pulled away.

Great advice. I know pulling back a bit will help. I need to be distant! It's quite hard though
Thanks for understanding

Oh, so sorry, I didn't mean to upset you. DS has been like that with me too. We have good days and bad days was the point I was badly trying to make.

At this age he's testing you. He knows mummy loves him, but needs to test that Daddy does too!. My dd did exactly the same thing a couple of months ago (she's 2 next month).