Assuming ethnicity on MN

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Not a TAAT but definitely inspired by a post on the thread To assume all MNers are UK based?

Totallypearshaped posted

I find it interesting that no one assumes that a poster is black, Asian or mixed race either.

It seems little Britain is alive and well

Neither white, Christian or in the uk here.

And it occurred to me that I tend to do exactly that. I do tend to assume that every other poster (especially those I agree with) are just like me - white British, 30s, professional, mum of 2. But now I think about it, my own assumptions are making me feel very uncomfortable.

Why do I do that? Is it a bad thing or is it just that I don't actually 'see' colour or ethnicity in writing? Am I actually simply seeing myself in other posters rather than seeing other posters as myself? In real life I firmly believe that if you don't pull others up on racism then you are inherently condoning it which makes you racist yourself thus I do pull up family, friends, associates when I see racism, sexism, homophobia and other similar things/unkindness.

(Hoping I'm not offending anyone by posting this pondering)

It's definitely an assumption made. I posted a while back worrying that my mixed-race kids would end up in a school that is notorious locally for shocking racism. Virtually every poster who responded overlooked what I'd said about them being of mixed heritage, and tried to share reassuring anecdotes about how it's OK to be the only white kid in a majority black or Asian school. I practically had to shout it in bolder capitals before some posters could grasp that my children are not white.

My son in law asked what I was reading on the tablet recently. When I told him mumsnet, he said "what?aren't they all daily mail middle class bigots". I told him more the opposite. I'm a white 55 year old male, left of centre politically and I don't think I'd be able to ascertain race by people's posts. Neither do I want to. The diversity of age range and opinion is what fosters debate, and provides humour too. I've learnt a lot here, so thank you all.

I don't think the point is to make "the right guess" about someone's race. I think it's worth occasionally pausing for a millisecond when writing advice to ask yourself "am I assuming white/mc/like me/whatever?" because assuming that a poster's kids are white might in context be the act of a right tit, like in the scenario ohdocalmdownJoanna pointed out.

👤 that's what I see. I read the words and opinions but I do not attach them to race, gender, sexuality, policital affiliation or anything else unless the person states something about their status that is relevant. Everyone lies, some more so than others. Some will bend the truth so as not to be outed on here. posters who have similar opinions to my own either look like me or they don't, but I really don't think about it in those terms.

I don't think I make that assumption, but it's a valid point.

I don't think about posters ethnicity unless they specifically state it. I don't assume they are white, I just don't think of it at all.
I do however, assume everyone is a female and in the UK unless they say otherwise.

I assume most people here are white (unless they say of theorise or somehow give it away).

I'm not white I'm mixed black and white. I don't many people who look "like me" (my brother, a cousin, 4/5 people I went to school with) so seeing people like me is a bit novel.

When people say nude/flesh coloured I assume they mean pale beige like plaster/tights/underwear. Things that usually don't match my skin.

I also assume most people are about 5-15 yeahs older than me.

Btw I grew up in London, lived in the country/seaside for a bit (I think we were/are the only not white people on the street), now mack living in London in a very black area though I have not friends

What ethnicity is everyone here? And where abouts are you based. Just curious........

Also there was a thing about this when a black woman was cast as hermione in the stage show of Harry Potter. People said than is was never explicitly said that hermione was white but JK Rowling is one of many writers that uses white as default she tends to say only that people are not white not that they are white.

I think people being middle class is assumed more than ethnicity! And sometimes patronising attitudes to pooer people, ie "can't you just take in some ironing op" in many posts about money issues.

boosh I'm mixed - white British & black British/Caribbean (depends on the form).

I grew up in (zone 5) East London, now live in (Zone 2) South London.

Anglo-Irish, was SE, now north Yorkshire.

I posted a while back worrying that my mixed-race kids would end up in a school that is notorious locally for shocking racism.

Even without being specifically told the children are mixed race I would assume they weren't white in that scenario. I don't understand why anyone would assume they were white if racism is mentioned.

99% of posters here imagine other posters as being just like themselves.

My particular circumstances mean I notice it a lot in relationship threads. Everyone's default assumption is always that in any hetero relationship the female partner is in a lower paying job/no job and has no significant assets, even when the first post has some really strong hints that that's not at all the case. It's funny seeing the 'you need to get married to have financial security' threads do a real quick 180 when OP comes back and tells everyone she has a great job and a big inheritance and some property and her partner's unemployed and in debt.

I think it's a fairly natural thing, but it can make people overlook a lot of what they're being told because it doesn't jibe with the picture in their head. As long as you're aware of it and try to make sure you're actually taking things in and not just seeing the parts you personally relate to, it's no big deal. Just don't be one of those nuisances who calls people in other time zones trolls because you can't comprehend that someone can be having lunch while you're going to bed.

I'm mixed race too - half thai, half Indian. Look Indian though. A friend is mixed race - half black, half-Indian. We've both had white people have assume that we're half-white, and when we correct them have had befuddled expressions followed by ignorant comments like 'that's asian then' or 'that's not mixed race'

We all make assumptions. I think it's useful to be aware of this. I am mindful of my unconscious bias. I attended a very interesting conference on diversity and unsconcious bias a few years ago. I also recently read Small Great Things by Jodi Picoult and, while it wasn't a great book, it had some interesting messages about what you see when you open your eyes. For those who think they're so open and accepting, do a bit of reading on unconscious bias. My friend is an ethnic minority but was adopted into a white family and her results did find that she saw her own culture and race very differently.

I do it too, as pp have said most mumsnet posters are uk based women and most people in England are white.
It's weird, I'm white but not British, DH is not white but British, and DS is mixed race but I don't really think much about race, maybe because I've pretty much always lived in university towns or in London?
We're hoping to move to the countryside with baby DS in a few years and DH hasn't mentioned any racism worries...he vaguely worries about me occasionally though after brexit!

I'm white British and come from a part of east London that is 97% 'ethnic minorities'
I was in a taxi and the Asian driver commented that my English was really good. I replied that I should bloody well hope so seeing as I was born and bred here and he apologised stating he thought I was Polish.

I make no assumptions on here to peoples ethnicity/sex/age or class but I think that growing up in such a diverse area helped me to be able to not do that.

Would it not be worse to be assuming otherwise depending on the circumstance? E.g. If someone is unemployed and looking for advice on benefits, to go 'oh they're probably not white, because
I am and I'm not in that situation' wouldn't be good.

I think I just have a vague, general "mumsnet" character in my head until there's some sort of indicator otherwise.

OP it is a form of racism.

I don't see it as racism and I say that as a mixed race person. I think the shitheads that have said things to me over the years are the racists. Not because someone has made an assumption that people are just like them, plus the fact she is questioning it, all good.

OP it is a form of racism.

Of course it isn't.

It's classed as institutional racism. It's so ingrained even people of colour accept it.

I tend not to assume, but then I live in an extremely diverse part of London.

People assume all sorts of things: that the poster is while, that they are heterosexual, that they are not disabled. Basically because these are the majority traits in Britain.

I find it helpful sometimes to state that I am disabled in a post. I wouldn't post about something where that fact was relevant then berate people for making the assumption that I am able bodied. That would be slightly twattish drip feeding. But often, of course, it is not relevant.