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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To move DS out of his room for a week

23 replies

StrawberryShortcake32 · 28/02/2017 08:17

DH'S aunt is coming to stay. She lives abroad. When his relatives have stayed before, they've been on a camp bed in the lounge and happy to do so. Now we've got 2 bedrooms DH has said he wants her to be on the camp bed in the 2nd room.

2nd bedroom belongs to 5 month old DS.
We've only recently started putting him down in his own room in his cot as he has outgrown the moses basket. So we've had no choice to move him to his own room as the cot won't fit in our bedroom.
I'm just starting to get him into a routine and he's going down much happier of an evening and is more familiar with his cot and being in his own room.

AIBU to ask hubby to put his aunt in the lounge instead of DS room? Shes always been happy to in the past and the bed will be the same regardless. I just don't want to spoil all the hard work we've done getting DS used to his room and being in his cot at night. Plus I don't see the point in buying a travel cot just so that he can sleep in our room for a week.

I also don't want his family to feel like they aren't welcome or that they are intruding because they are lovely people and I'd never begrudge them a visit.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Soubriquet · 28/02/2017 08:20

I don't think yabu but many others will probably say you are

It's your ds's bedroom and he's getting into a routine

Your aunt could pay out for a hotel but is accepting free lodgings. If she's been happy previously to sleep in the lounge she can continue where she is

icanteven · 28/02/2017 08:27

Yabu. Of course the aunt should have the actual bedroom.

You can get a travel cot for £10 on gumtree or eBay - they're useful to have, anyway.

sum1killthepawpatrollers · 28/02/2017 08:28

would a travel cot even fit in your room if his normal cot wont?
the ones ive had have either been wider or the same size as the cot

rumblingDMexploitingbstds · 28/02/2017 08:30

If I was the aunt I'd be very happy to prevent ds losing his routine - it sounds like you have a lovely relationship with her, it's the same bed and the lounge should be just as comfortable.

FuzzyFalafelz · 28/02/2017 08:31

Why don't you give up your room for aunt and sleep in DS's room

witsender · 28/02/2017 08:33

Yabu, he's a baby and doesn't need his own room. It would be way less stressful for all of you to not have an aunt sleeping in your living room

welshweasel · 28/02/2017 08:33

We've always put DS in a travel cot in our room when friends stay. It's good to get them used to sleeping in one so that when you go away it's familiar. I'm afraid in this family adults always trump kids of any age for sleeping.

LIZS · 28/02/2017 08:34

Move ds into yours. SIDS advice it until 6 months anyway.

gamerchick · 28/02/2017 08:34

Tell your husband that he should give up his bedroom and sleep in the living room and you'll go in with the bairn.

He may see things differently then if he's the one being hoofed out.

bloodyteenagers · 28/02/2017 08:36

So what happens in a years time when relative comes? Or in 3 years? Child to be always turfed out of his room to put up relatives and where would he sleep then?
Start as you mean to go on. It won't always be practical to move him.

Athrawes · 28/02/2017 08:37

I wouldn't have thought to move DS out of his room at that age. But I would have given the guest our room and had us, the parents, sleep in the living room so that the guest could have the bed.

Trifleorbust · 28/02/2017 08:40

I would want to stick with the routine. These things are hard won.

Jux · 28/02/2017 08:47

YABU.

DS could be put to bed in the normal way, and then when dh's aunt goes to bed, you can move him very gently into another room.

It is very useful to be able to move children in their sleep. You'll be happy you got him used to it young.

Greyponcho · 28/02/2017 08:49

Just speak to him.
don't know why this warrants a thread Hmm

JigglyTuff · 28/02/2017 08:50

He's a baby. Put him in a travel cot for a week. I'm sure you can borrow one if you're not planning on going on holiday in the next year.

RedAndYellowPeppers · 28/02/2017 08:50

Yes a routine is hard won.
However, that's also what happens when you don't have a spare bedroom. Children are moved to another room, usually their parents for the duration of the stay.

I would probably ask the relative but my first proposal would be the propose them the room so they have a space of their own to get changed, maybe sleep a bit longer in the am or go to bed earlier if that's what they want to do.
It's not just about the bed iyswim

SuperRainbows · 28/02/2017 08:59

I would definitely put your Aunt in bedroom. She will be much more comfortable having a base for her belongings.

My dcs have always taken turns to move out when my Mum has come to stay, so probably twice a year each on average for a few nights.

They all have nice rooms, but understand they need to share occasionally. They moan a bit to me, but tell Grandma they don't mind at all!

They get their room tidied by me as a treat, feel appreciated and have learned to share and put others first sometimes.

This is important to me, as my DH has a very selfish side to him and I want the dcs to be kind and thoughtful.

Trifleorbust · 28/02/2017 09:01

In all honesty it would depend on the aunt. Independent, efficient type? Lounge. Fussy, needy type? Bedroom.

PussCatTheGoldfish · 28/02/2017 09:14

Can't DH's aunt share with your son? Extra pair of night time hands to help!

As a child I was always the one to give up my bed when relations came to stay, I would camp out on my mum and dad's floor sleeping on something fondly known as the biscuit Grin, even up to when I left home. It's not ideal, but older more infirm guests really appreciate sleeping on a usual height bed.

MidniteScribbler · 28/02/2017 09:28

With a five month old, I'd move him for the week. But once they are more aware of their own space, I'd say no. I decided years ago that I'm not getting turfed out of my room for anyone, and neither is DS. I have a guest room, or it's a blow up mattress on the floor of the study if there's more than can fit in the guest room. Bedrooms are ours, and if there's not enough space, then the visitors will need to make other arrangements.

StrawberryShortcake32 · 28/02/2017 09:55

Some mixed views on this.
Thank you all for your replies. Some handy things to think about.

OP posts:
SeeMyVest · 28/02/2017 10:26

I wouldn't feel comfortable hosting someone and having them sleep in the lounge while myself, DH and LO have our own rooms. It just isn't what I'd do

FuzzyFalafelz · 28/02/2017 10:27

Give your aunt your room. If you sleep in DS room, you will maintain his routine

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