To refuse to call him by his stupid nickname??

[PonyPals]

So we have a brand new staff member in my team who has a perfectly sensible name - Steven but has decided to use some ridiculously stupid nickname he made up - Sonty
And he is now constantly correcting all of us and insisting we use his nickname. I am his manager. I feel silly even uttering Sonty. Yet he corrects me every time I say Steven.
Aibi to want to take Sonty and shove it up his bum!
PS not his real name or moronic nickname but they are similar to what I said.

IvyLeagueUnderTheSea - I know a terribly senior 'Jez' actually. But admittedly he works in a creative field. Think senior partner in an advertising firm type thing. He's 'Jeremy' when meeting clients', but 'Jez' to everyone in the office and away from the clients.

One lady I know is an extremely proud godmother. When her god daughter was little she couldn't province her god mother's name "Sadie" and instead called her "shadie" as in Shady. It irrationally pisses me off nonend that this woman still calls herself Shadie to everyone who knows her and the god daughter - who is now 8 and cringing herself that she couldn't say Sadie. Shady where I am from also means slightly dodgy or underhand.

Dazza sounds too informal for some places of work.

Jez around the office but Jeremy formally is fine.

That said I have a family member who is a professor. He goes by a nick name, think Nicky. Everyone calls him Nicky, all family call him Nicky, he was even introduced on the Today Program on Radio 4 as Nicky.
However his real name is Stephen.

*pronounce not province. Argh!

Ivy, is his nickname Stevie?

No, Not, his nickname is Nicky. It has nothing to do with his given name.

Poor Dazza, society just isn't ready for him yet The association with being yelled drunkenly across a pub is still too strong.

In the meantime, I'd go with the starting formally with clients, then maybe trying to reduce the formality after or behind the scenes.

When I meet a new class, I check preferred versions of names and am happy to use the diminutive version associated with their name. I have on a couple of occasions vetoed informal nicknames that are best saved for the playground explaining that it's fine between mates, but I have a formal relationship with them and their parents, and the nickname their mates call them isn't appropriate for that relationship.

Met this morning and I introduced Dazza. Hi Professor Alexander, I would like to meet our new team member Darren Smith.
Darren puts his hand out and says... call me Dazza. Prof shakes his hand and says "nice to meet you Mr Smith!

Midnightscibbler.. I love your explanation!

YANBU

As an Aussie, I find Dazza ridiculous.

I have a couple of nicknames, a shortening of my name (think Melissa shortened to Liss) and also by my initial (using Melissa, think M). I would never, ever, ask my boss or my clients to call me by a nickname because it's incredibly unprofessional.

This is a working environment and he needs to be aware there's a time and a place. He may think that using a nickname makes him more personable but not everyone is comfortable with that.

I never get how some people end up with names. We get a lot at work (usually elderly people) where it's "his name is Michael but he's known as Dave" or "her name is Elizabeth but she's known as Carole"
I mean they're completely different names, not even a shortened version!

Provided it's not illegal or offensive (e.g. Fuckmeboogaloo) then why wouldn't you call someone by the name they've chosen for themselves? Sonty is no big deal.

Ivy, is his surname Hawking?

'Nice to meet you, Mr Smith.' Excellent.

Ugh. Dazza? A bit like a 'Gary' wanting you to call him 'Gazza'
Call him Daz if he really stomps his feet. Or just keep calling him Darren.

Actually, just don't bother using his name when talking to him.

I have a visceral reaction to any name shortened and then having a 'z' added to it. If I am introduced to a Baz, Daz, Kaz etc I physically can't say it and will go to extreme lengths to avoid saying their names at all. I do (awfully) pre-judge!

Coming home from work and see these lovely sight.
This is how I picture Dazza and his mates hanging out.
My DH thinks this thread is hilarious. He decided that he now wants me to call him Pezza

I like Professor Alexander, what a perfect response to a sticky situation! Good man!

And thanks for the rools, Midnite, very good!

I had a manager whose name was Warren, but went by Wazza to everyone. Legally, our legal names had to be on our nametags, but everyone called him Wazza, and no one so much as blinked.

Names are... you don't get a choice what your parents name you, but as an adult, you know yourself, and you know what you want to be called, and as long as it it's not offensive, I don't see that anyone has the right to tell any other human being what their name should be. Names can be such a huge part of a person's identity. Now admittedly, I don't think that's the case with Dazza - from what you've said, he sounds more like "I'm so used to this nickname/shortening, I want to carry on being called that", but remember that for some people it's a much bigger issue.

Is his work adequate? Does he show up on time, is his hygiene good, are his manners and etiquette up to snuff? Does he stick to the dress code? As his boss/superior, those are the things you should be concentrating on. Not his name. That's for him to decide.

What if he changes his name legally?

I would think an academic setting was the one place you could get a way with it.
BTW Margaret > Marguerite >daisy

I work with a 50-something Darryn (I see your Darren and raise you a Darryn). He goes by Daz on Facebook, and I dare say his close mates know him as Dazza.

He has one gold hoop in one ear, and two (cubic zirconia) earrings in the other. If this wasn't the very personification of Dazza-type behaviour, he bats it out of the park by wearing a ring on every single finger. And this is all done without a hint of irony.

We have a Daz and a Baz in the office. It's taken me 6 years but I can manage it now.

LOVE this thread, thank you OP. Points to colleague for 'Mr Smith'.

Met this morning and I introduced Dazza. Hi Professor Alexander, I would like to meet our new team member Darren Smith.
Darren puts his hand out and says... call me Dazza. Prof shakes his hand and says "nice to meet you Mr Smith!