Am I being horrible?

[user1483875094]

Currently, due to staffing issues at work, I am working 6 days a week, and all my lovely friends know this. Today, my ONE day off, started with one friend turning up at 9.45 for coffee, lovely, but I was about to go and do some grocery shopping ... I have LONGED for my day off, to get on with the "stuff" you have to get done... washing, shopping, housework, switch the brain off, friend 1 left, and as I was putting my shoes on to get out of the house, friend 2, turned up for a chill out and an hour and a half catch up. At this point, I began to feel a bit stressy and friend 2 asked me if was ok? I said "not really, I am exhausted and have SO much to get through today, and this 6 day week is a bit much" - she sympathised, and I do love her to bits, but then she put the kettle on for a second cup!!!

arrgghh .... so by nearly 2 p.m. all I managed was to write up my shopping list, hence writing at half past ten tonight, whilst I am still trying to get the washing done. How on EARTH do I deal with this?? I love my friends to bits... but why can't they recognise that I so badly need my time? Any hints?

I don't really understand, why didn't you just tell them you were on your way out?

Oh i hate people turning up unannounced. Thankfully most people know I hate it and don't do it! Honestly, I wouldn't even answer the door on my day off if I thought people would turn up like that. But if I did, I'd manage expectations from the off - "oh, hi! I'm heading out in about 45 mins but you are welcome to come in for a quick cuppa".

Oh hi! I'm about to go do my food shop, want to come with me

This, or let them go home. If Sunday was the only day I could go to the supermarket, I need to be in and out in the first hour or else I do not go at all as I cannot be doing with mega busy shops, like they are for most of the weekend.

But you do need to be direct with them that you don't have time for chat if Sunday is your only day to get stuff done. If you are lucky, they may offer to help.

Not sure you are after advice but I'll still give you mine: why not do the household chores during the days you work and use your 7th day for relaxing/seeing friends?
Online shopping during your commute/lunch break. One batch of laundry timed so it finishes when you get home. etc.

I wouldn't have opened the door and if I had then the look on my face would deter anyone from crossing the threshold.
But what you really need OP is a friend like me - I don't turn up uninvited but you could have invited me round to do some cleaning for you while you went out grocery shopping
So you're not being unreasonable in being frustrated, but you are slightly in not having made it really clear to them that they needed to go. And organise an online shop to arrive Sunday morning while you're doing chores. Miles easier, and once the doorbell has rung for that you can ignore it!

YANBU I hate unannounced visitors. It's hard to turn someone away when you're just doing chores as people feel that they could be done anytime. I love my alone time but have no back bone so I'd probably invent an appointment I had to rush to. IT's also totally irrelevant that some people would love loads of unannounced visitors - OP doesn't.

I don't understand why you didn't just tell her that you're not free for a cuppa because you're going shopping, or you only have time for
a really quick drink while you write your shopping list or something. If you're busy you're busy and someone dropping in unannounced shouldn't get in the way of your life.

You are not being horrible. Your friends probably meant well and wanted to cheer you up but what is relaxing to one person is not necessarily relaxing to another. I find socialising stressful and need it to be scheduled, unexpected visitors would annoy me. And it's unperceptive of them not to realise you would need to catch up with things on your one day off! I think if it happens again it would be totally reasonable to say, 'sorry I'm just off out I have lots of chores to catch up with, please call first next time.'