Labia glue for periods?

[HateSummer]

www.google.co.uk/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/women/health/vagina-sealing-glue-stick-terrifying-new-alternative-traditional/amp/?client=safari

I just read this on my newsfeed and am really shocked and angry. It's a "glue" designed by a man to shut the vagina during your period and then "opens" it up when you wee. It has been granted a patent but not on sale to the public yet. The "inventor" is a proper arsehole too.

Wtaf?!

Menstrual blood doesn't clot?! 😱
When I had dd2 I was left laying for over 5 hours. When I finally got up to shower a massive clot the size of a piece of bread slid out of me. I thought it was my placenta but my mw told me it was blood that had clotted as I wasn't upright and letting it flow out.

how is menstrual blood different from lochia?

fluffy Menstrual blood does clot. Especially if you have a heavy flow < fact>

I suggest this guy tries this out as a form of contraception first by glueing his willy shut first. Then come back and tell us its ok to use.

Toxic shock syndrome anyone?

Blood rotting in your vagina?

Occasionally bursting open in public and flooding the room?

Only someone who's never menstruated could come up with something so awful. And I'm not sure it would even work, anatomically. Labia are more to cover the urethra and clitoris aren't they?

There are anticoagulants released at menstruation but they dont always keep up with a heavy flow.

Fake news surely? Glue near pubes....

This cannot be real.

How long before someone accidently mistakes the lipstick for real lipstick?

I can see the sad face article already... 'Woman mistakes vag-glue for lipstick... rescuer pees on her face to free her...'

Well, loads of stuff gets patented that never, ever makes it onto the market. It's really not that expensive to file a patent, anyone can do it. And the patent is granted if it is a novel idea, it doesn't have to be particularly practical or desirable. I remember doing a patent seminar at uni, and an example the patent attorney was using was a patent granted for a catflap activated by particular wavelengths of light. So you could have a catflap that could only be activated by black cats or pale cats. The invention went on to cover a missile defense system based on the same technology...Barking mad, unworkable, but patented.
So I wouldn't necessarily expect to see this stuff in the shops (ever) anytime soon. But not the worst idea ever - surely it's basically the same principle as using a mooncup? Contain the blood til you get to a loo.

Just when i thought i could understand his reasoning, i read his comments
I am neither l,g,b or t. I just think he is an idiot and very offensive.
I would not buy anything from him.
Doesn't sound like he likes women from his comments

This can't be real surely? It's all kinds of wrong.

Before I had my hysterectomy I was losing so much blood thanks to a fibroid that it would have had to be fecking superglue.

Stupid idea.

Slight flaw in this plan, for those of us with weaker bladders. Especially when using trampolines! What a mess that will make!

I just can't imagine gluing my fanny flaps together.

Interesting.
Would it work on the inventors cake hole, I wonder?
Or his bottom to avoid smelly pumps?
IME men are distracted 33% of the time by farts.
True fact.

wonder if this will be on the mumsnet tester panel?! Can't see many people signing up to be a tester.
Can't help thinking this story should have been released in 37 days time!

You haven't suggested that the 'good doctor' tries using a stapler on HIS parts first!

Fake news - surely ?

how the hell does that work

anyway the mans an utter twat-pig

Fake news - surely ?

We can only hope, Lizzie, we can only hope.

I remember the massive, fluid-filled blisters that I got when I used a glue-on bra, there's no way I'm gluing my labia!

So you glue your flaps together to stop the blood from coming out, but. Its got to come out sometime. It xsnt stay in there forever.
Women have had periods since humans began, and They'll have them until we cease to exist. There's no shame in them. God help his poor wife. Assuming anyone's soft enough to put up with him
I agree about gluing is arse cheeks together. He might stop chatting shit from it then. The idiot. !!!

I laughed like a human drain reading this thread

It does clot but it is true it doesn't clot as well as it could, because your body produces a chemical thing called plasmin which breaks down the blood clots faster, hence needing tranexamic acid to make mine clot (which works). Outside of periods I don't think you produce so much plasmin. Some women like me produce too much plasmin possibly which leads to the flooding (caused by the fecking fibroids)

I would not in a million years put glue in my bits. I get thrush just from looking at synthetic knickers

You can fuck right off if you think I'm glueing my fanny together.

I just had a minge twinge and not in a good way, less a twinge more a shudder!

I really don't see how it would work without restricting movement.

Haha! My friend sent me this link. I was "wtf??"

I bleed. Fuck it. See the mess in the bathroom bin, tampon bits, have sex, blood, yes. Mess. Yup.

You married a woman. That's all folks.

We did come up with something better than pads or tampons. The mooncup. Along the same lines of fluid collection for later disposal but doesn't need glue to stay in place, isn't water soluble, and won't interfere with toileting (different tubes, dr!)