To think why bother having kids in the first place!

[Chelazla]

Lots of us have to work, we pay people to look after our kids, put them in breakfast club, holiday club etc. It needs to be done! BUT watching the Wright stuff I'm mystified that people are paying £2000 to people to potty train their kids and £20 per hour to ride a bike!!! Surely if you can't be bothered to do these most basic of things why bother having them! Maybe I'm being unreasonable but to me it's madness!!

@Chelazla

I have an autistic child with severe dyspraxia. I am paying someone to teach him how to ride a bike as it is so far from your "But everyone can find a flat pavement and balance their kid on a bike!! It's just laziness" that you clearly can't imagine.

The same child (then undiagnosed) was a nightmare to potty train, and neither childminder nor nursery were able to help.

You are very certain for one so ignorant of other people's lives.

Magic???

i agree with the comment about nursery doing most of the potty training!

"Maybe I'm wrong! "

Yes you are fucking are. A bike is no more special than swimming lessons.

Ds2 (3.5 and undergoing autism assessments) will not potty train. He needs to be potty trained by September for school. If I had 2k to throw at someone else getting him dry, yep take my money!

Thesnork I did acknowledge that disabilities might be an issue earlier on if you look. I also said I'm willing to be told I'm wrong! This is supposed to be a discussion website why does it always turn so nasty!

The snork please don't swear at me. I wouldn't you.

I didn't have kids to experience the joys of potty-training. It's like asking why you have a house, if you employ a cleaner - I like the house, I don't care for scrubbing the toilets much.

I was a single mum trying to teach my six year old to ride a bike while simultaneously trying to stop my two year old running into the road, sitting in puddles or eating dirt.
In the end I got his dad to take him on his own, but not everyone has that option.
Nothing wrong with outsourcing some bits. You play to your strengths and circumstances.

Also, sense of triumph when they master potty training?! I don't remember that bit...

It turns nasty because ignorant people like you go on and on about how much better parents they are and the rest of us are lazy sods who don't parent their children adequately. It's painful to hear it day in day out.

Meh, I can't get het up about how other parents decide to spend their own money and raise their children. I think your post comes across as very judgmental and YABU.

Each to their own I guess but yes I do find it quite odd, I also find it odd hiring a night nurse for your first child so you don't have to get up at night as one of my acquaintances did.

Around where I live in central London, there are a lot of kids being looked after by nannies from 7am to 7pm Mon-Fri plus at least one day each weekend.

I understand parents have to work, my husband and I both work too. But I do often wonder why have kids if you are not interested in spending any time with them.

Wouldn't it be easier and a lot cheaper just to remain childfree?

Well at least this makes a nice change from bashing working mothers.

I am all for people having different opinions! I put it in Aibu perfectly willing to be told I was and with some people who have replied I can definitely see the need for these services. So there I am! Equally some points I disagree with and would reply to those politely but everything always turns so nasty on here. I'm asking for it to be deleted not because I can't handle being told I'm wrong but because I can't be bothered to be swore at.

Dds had balance bikes fiRst, so they both just hopped on a bike without stabilisers and off they went first time. No teaching required. My point is I don't feel I missed out by not getting to teach them. Now we can go for family bike rides in a woods, far more enjoyable.

You could say this about anything! Why bother working if you're going to want time off/ why bother having a house if you're going to employ a cleaner/why bother having kids if you're going to go back to work.

Parenting is more than the sum of its parts... just because you pay someone to do something doesn't mean you're any less of a parent. People who send their kids to boarding school- are they less of a parent? No. Most parents are all just trying to do the best they can- and news flash not everyone enjoys every single second of being a parent, just like not everyone enjoys every second of their job. Just because you've paid someone to help you do part of it doesn't mean that you're lazy! There's a myriad of reasons as to why you might pay.

If people would just stop assuming that if you're not involved in everything parenting up to your elbows then you're a lazy parent then I think the world would be a better place!

I would pay someone to teach my kids to ride their bikes because they certainly aren't learning from dh or I!! I currently pay for swimming lessons for dd (ds can't have them for medical reasons) and I'll pay for them to learn to drive. Potty training, I managed to do all by myself! Some things just aren't fun to teach but could be beneficial once the skill is learnt so I'm not against it per se. We spend a lot of time doing fun stuff though...making dens, singing, dancing etc

I don't know about anyone else but I didn't have dc to feel a sense of achievement about potty training! I take pride in their achievements as their mother but it doesn't mean I have a clue how or why they do some stuff. I'm not an expert.

That does also assume there is some end, finite point to these things. That doesn't always happen.

We had the dc to be a family. We have outsourced some of the grunt work because it allows us to spend time together doing nice things. Things that don't involve much piss or shit.

Because, to be quite honest, when your child is in nursery they do the bulk of the potty training work.

Jaw drops! (but I'm assuming this was tongue in cheek anyway) It never crossed my mind to send them to pre-school not potty trained. Some other kids were still in nappies, but I thought they might have underlying issues. They all started preschool about age 2 .

I'm definately in the wrong business! I would train a child to use the toilet in a week for £2000. hell, I'd train the whole pre-school class for that!

OP, there are people who say exactly the same thing ('Why have children in the first place if you can't be bothered to do basic thing x?') about working mothers.

We went to holiday clubs when younger and had loads of fun. Parents got to relax so were happy.

Ooh! I have personal experience of this! I have just spent £40 on lessons to teach my ds1 how to ride a bike.

Best. Thing. Ever.

Back story: ds1 had an issue with his arm which involved multiple operations and meant that back when other children were learning to ride bikes he didn't. So, 10 years old, still can't ride a bike, falling behind his friends, confidence rock bottom.

Dh tried to teach him. Failure, would get severely anxious, always ended in tears.

I tried to teach him. Failure, more tears.

My dad tried to teach him. No tears, but also no progress despite multiple attempts.

These various attempts were over the space of around 3 years btw.

So we bit the bullet. Local bike charity, 1-1 one hour lesson £20. We reckoned if it turned out to be something he really couldn't do, a balance issue or whatever, they'd at least be able to tell us.

At the end of the lesson - he could ride a bike!!!!! It was honestly amazing. Second lesson wasn't really necessary but it was fun and he learnt about the gears and a bit of maintenance as well as practice.

His self confidence is through the roof, he's out on his bike every day.

The £40 was a bargain .

Well, I home school my kids and I think it's laziness that parents would put their children into school all day to be taught how to read and write by somebody else. I am a mother after all it's my job!!!

Actually that's not true and I outsource loads of my parenting and my DC aren't school aged yet! It's ridiculous to pick and mix what you think is acceptable and to be so opinionated about it. Swimming yes, cycling no is so arbitrary