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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have told this woman to take her kid somewhere else to play?

232 replies

KeepingOnAndOn · 20/02/2017 19:01

We live on a very large private housing estate. It has a vast number of kids parks, little sports fields and safe places to play. It also has a couple of designated dog walking areas.

Naturally I take my dog to the dog walking areas - one in particular I like as it's away from houses, away from roads, is surrounded by trees and is a good mucky, mini wilderness for my dog to go nuts in.

I can let him off his lead here as we're normally the only ones there and if not, it's just other adults with dogs which he's fine with. If he sees a child, he will run up to them and beg for attention which is why I don't take him around the kiddy areas.

Anyway we've had no problem with this for over a year now. Until last week he was off happily exploring the wooded area when he caught a glimpse of a woman, little kid and remote control car. As they get closer he sees the car and immediately goes chasing after it, the kid screamed, the woman freaked out and the dog pounced on the car and sent it flying. I managed to grab him, apologised, picked up the car and checked it over and all was well (apart from the kid telling his mum that he doesn't like "that" stupid dog 🙄).

Tonight - same area and what comes flying through the trees but this remote control car. Dog goes nuts trying to chase it, kid screams - I grab dog before the car gets it. At this point the woman says "can't you keep that dog on a lead? My son is scared of dogs and it's putting him off coming here!" 😳 I say "you realise this is a dog walking area? That's why he isn't on a lead. There are loads of kids play parks around and only two dog walking areas". She replies "well he doesn't like playing there as the other kids get in the way of his car, this is a nice open space for him. If you kept your dog controlled it wouldn't be a problem!".

So to this I said I would not be prepared to keep my dog on a lead in what is a designated dog area, lots of dog owners use the area to let their dogs off the lead and if it's a problem for her she shouldn't use it!

She stormed off ranting on about shitty attitudes, people who put dogs before kids and selfish idiots.

I refrained from calling her the stupid loony cow that she so obviously is.

AIBU to think she's bat shit crazy to suggest her kid takes priority in a DOG WALKING area??

OP posts:
Evilstepmum01 · 20/02/2017 20:35

YADNBU. I say that as a dog lover/owner and a mum who has in the past, kneed in the chest out of control dogs!

If the council calls it a designated dog walking area, it must be true! the council are never wrong!

We live beside a playpark/dog field and I control our dog appropriately. Except when theres the idiot with his petrol remote control car. Dogs are either petrified of it or chase it. thats the risk he runs using a public space.
Especially one designated and designed specifically for dog-walking
no offical sign but I can make one and colour it in

UserReuser · 20/02/2017 20:37

I thought your dog had a habit of running up to people/ children? Now it won't register my presence?

NavyandWhite · 20/02/2017 20:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OldTownNew · 20/02/2017 20:38

It doesn't matter what your dog is going to chase, you should have enough control that if you call it back, it comes back. And straight away. How food orientated is your dog? If mine knows I have treats in my pocket then I don't even get time to finish a whistle before she's back Grin

sopsmum · 20/02/2017 20:39

Yanbu BUT you also sound like you have no control of your dog. I suspect you came across as a bit entitled to be honest.

I have come across lots of entitled dog owners with no recall abilities whilst out with my children so whilst in this instance she sounds like a silly mare the fact you were in a designated dog area is slightly irrelevant if you can't control your dog.

A member of my family has a guide dog. So he would be perfectly entitled to walk his dog in your designated (but not really) area. He would be quite disorientated however if your loony dog lept up at him. Likewise my mother is frail. Are you saying neither of them should be in the designated dog walking area either?

Original poster
KeepingOnAndOn · 20/02/2017 20:41

It doesn't bother with adults unless they specifically bother with him.

Kids do tend to bother him as he's one of those funny looking dogs that kids are fastinated with so he's kind of got used to kids wanting to play with him. So yes he may run off in the direction of a kid but if I shout him back, he'll come back.

However this is why I don't take him to kiddy places as calling him back every five minutes (especially when a lot of kids encourage him) is just tiring.

OP posts:
youarenotkiddingme · 20/02/2017 20:43

Yanbu - and I'm scared of lots of dogs! That's why i would t go to a designated dog walking area!

Original poster
KeepingOnAndOn · 20/02/2017 20:43

He wouldn't jump up at random people. I'm positive of that.

OP posts:
NavyandWhite · 20/02/2017 20:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Italiangreyhound · 20/02/2017 20:52

Of course you are not being unreasonable, she should keep her car under control!

NavyandWhite · 20/02/2017 20:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FlyingElbows · 20/02/2017 20:58

You can be as self righteous as you like, op but you're guaranteed that if fido takes a nip at a rogue child it'll be you on the wrong end of the law. Your dog is not under control in public. Do him a favour and put him on a lead. You can bet that if you end up in legal hot water the council will deny any knowledge of a designated dog area while it isn't publicly signed as such.

Mummyamy123 · 20/02/2017 20:59

I thought you were going to say your dog bit the child- in which case I was going to call you unreasonable!!
But he chased a small moving object. This woman sounds crazy!!!!! She was being unreasonable.......don't give her another thought!!

Veterinari · 20/02/2017 21:01

Navy no animal (or human for that matter) is 100% well behaved all of the time.

NavyandWhite · 20/02/2017 21:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

iwasagirlinavillage · 20/02/2017 21:02

I have children and not dogs. I take my children to a wooded area where there are lots of dog walkers with dogs off leads. A lot of them, when they see us, call their dog to them and away from us. I feel bad that they feel the need to do that as I feel like we're on their territory and they shouldn't have to make allowances for us. Also, we don't and wouldn't take a remote control car with us! YANBU!

Oliversmumsarmy · 20/02/2017 21:05

All those who say the dog should be on a lead at all times. Where are dogs supposed to get a good run around if they are on the lead at all times. Also how can you practice recall without letting them off their lead

NavyandWhite · 20/02/2017 21:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bellebullerebelle · 20/02/2017 21:14

Sorry but YABU. You now know there is a little one with a whizzy car around these parts that your dog likes to chase so you need to control your dog. There's a dog round here that chases kids on bikes. A recipe for disaster. The dog should be on a lead. Get a long training leash and use the kid and his car to do some training. It's a short term inconvenience if you can use it to your advantage.

woodhill · 20/02/2017 21:18

Yanbu, has she not got a garden for the car?

It's a designated area for your poor dog.

Veterinari · 20/02/2017 21:18

*Today 21:01 Veterinari

Navy no animal (or human for that matter) is 100% well behaved all of the time.

Today 21:02 NavyandWhite

Yes and that's why those that aren't should be on a lead.*

Fair enough - there are plenty of humans who'd be better behaved on leads Grin

sibys1 · 20/02/2017 21:21

It's a YABU for me because it sounds like you have real problems with your dog's recall.

That said, it's pretty dumb to take a kid who's scared of dogs to a dog walking area.

scoobydoo1971 · 20/02/2017 21:34

I have two well-behaved dogs. I keep them on retractable leads in public places for a couple of reasons. Firstly, they are super friendly and cute looking attracting lots of people saying 'awww' and whipping them up into an excited frenzy. Then their licking, pouncing play behaviour could be miscontrued by a member of the public as aggression. Secondly, other dogs can be behaviourally out-of-control, and I can think of some dogs out on our walks who should be muzzled. One of my dogs was bitten in a public park by a dog off the lead with owners in the distance with no control, and too far away to restrain it. If my dog hadn't been on the lead then I wouldn't have been able to intervene so well in separating them, and the repair bill at the vets would have been a lot more.

Even the most well behaved dog has an off-day and can cause an accident chasing wheels, kids balls etc.

bosch · 20/02/2017 21:44

Sorry, not read whole thread but intrigued at the idea of having a totally reliable dog recall wise. We have rescue dog who is pretty unreliable at recall if he thinks he's seen a squirrel etc. We take him to all the parks in our city, off lead. I call his name all the time fruitlessly...and then he comes back. When we first got him and took him for training, the trainer advised that sometimes a dog just won't recall and you have to give in a go and get him...perhaps I took that to heart a bit too much and didn't persist with recall training.

He's totally not aggressive with other people, but I can see that a dog (small lab size) running towards some people makes them nervous and he will recall if he's not seen that imaginery squirrel. Also, we have a couple of remote control cars, and they do move a bit like rats so I can totally see why a dog would chase - mainly people use them at a childrens playground and on paths off the main area of parks and if I see people using them, I'd call the dog and put him back on his lead.

OP I think YANBU, but you may never be able to persuade that woman that you are in the right, so try to get someone on your side - is the land managed by a management company or the Council?? Or a residents association?

sibys1 · 20/02/2017 21:45

Having a childish giggle at the last line of scoobydoo1971's post