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Original poster

Parent and child parking! 12 and 9 year old?!

604 replies

AnySecondNow · 18/02/2017 15:30

Just had a row with a woman in Tesco car park. I waited 15 minutes for parking - have to carry a fairly solid 6 month old to the shop (post cesarean - still not 100%!)

Anyway, this family were parked in child and parent bay with a 12 year old and a 9 year old. Both very capable of walking and opening doors! I commented that she was rude to park there, she said she was entitled to. Then her husband complained about me to the management!!!

Wtf!? Ainu??! Parent and child surely means young child that needs assistance??!

OP posts:
Lalala7 · 19/02/2017 19:51

It depends where you were - in London and greater London shopping centres specify "under 5's".
Elsewhere, rather than exploit the grey area selfishly, parents with over 5's would do well to remember how often, in a normal parking spot, they've been unable to open the car door wide enough for the car seat containing infant to slide in (or out) because other car is too close/ too large etc, or how often they've had to strap toddler in or out from their own driver seat because again they couldn't open the door wide enough:
Parent & Child spots have, just like disabled spots, a large free area on either sides to get the wheelchair/ car seated infant/ strapped toddler in and out...

frozenfairy123 · 19/02/2017 19:53

Not read all messages but it does worry me that you are having problems with your c section 6 months down the line? Are your abs weak? Or more serious issues? Please go see your gp xx

clarkl2 · 19/02/2017 19:56

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

elektrawoman · 19/02/2017 19:58

I haven't read the whole thread but I wouldn't use p&c parking with my 8 and 11 year old, it would be selfish. The walk would do them good, and I still remember what it's like carrying a baby in a car seat / wrestling toddlers, it's really hard work.

When I have my 5 year old I do sometimes use the p&c spaces because she still needs help with her seatbelt and it's quite difficult doing that in narrow spaces without banging the other car.

mrsBeverleygoldberg · 19/02/2017 20:03

I have a 12 year old ds. I like to park there as he has dyspraxia. This means he is more uncoordinated and more likely to over open his car door and dent the car next to us.
You can't really judge as he looks normal.

Notquitewhatiexpected · 19/02/2017 20:05

Purple Daisies - Ah, so it is the quote marks, I'll try to remember that when I feel the need to refer to any member of my family as 'disabled', otherwise people may assume I'm being 'disablist' about my own family...heaven forbid. You see, being aspergers I just don't get these nuances. Jeez.

PurpleDaisies · 19/02/2017 20:12

I can't tell if you're being disingenuous or not notquitewhatiexpected. Referring to someone as 'disabled' when they have a blue badge is saying you do not think they should have been awarded the badge. It has very negative connotations.

Say what you like about yourself or your own family. It's wrong to suggest that someone else's child that you know nothing about doesn't deserve their blue badge.

JerryFerry · 19/02/2017 20:12

reup yes it's bollocjs. Shock horror others of us have experienced driving, parking and shopping with children. And we didn't spontaneously combust! Oh how clever we are.

cherish123 · 19/02/2017 20:15

In fairness, Parent and Child spaces are not a right - they are a privilege. Even at 9 /12, they can be useful as children can be hasty and band car doors open.

JigglyTuff · 19/02/2017 20:16

Thanks @presidentoliviamumsnet - much appreciated Flowers and of course Gin :)

notquite - I don't care what your personal circumstances are. What you wrote was disablist.

BillyButtfuck · 19/02/2017 20:17

This would piss me off. I have twins (under 1) and it's really difficult to get two car seats out from both sides in regular spaces. I genuinely need wider spaces in most car parks to make sure I don't bash other people's cars. It's not about being closer to the shop for me, just the added room.
At our local Sainsbury's they have signs up saying they are for people with children under 12 and every time I struggle in the normal spaces or have to wait for ages for a space to become free and I see perfectly able 12ish year olds getting themselves out of the car my blood boils a little.

YWBU to make a fuss though. Life's too short.

BillyButtfuck · 19/02/2017 20:20

And you are a bit precious about your fairly solid 6mo, try carrying two babies in car seats by yourself after a C-Section when older children are taking up P&C spaces Wink

elektrawoman · 19/02/2017 20:23

It's funny how there's another thread where a young kid banged a car door against the next car and everyone is 'you should supervise them better!'
But on this thread it's 'older kids need the p&c spaces so they don't bang the neighbouring car!'
I think older kids are perfectly capable of getting out of a smaller parking space if you remind them to open the door carefully.

TwinsPlusAnotherTwo · 19/02/2017 20:29

YANBU - this often winds me up. I had an arguement in a Tesco car park with a guy who had parked in a parent and child space and only had A DOG in his car. I had to wrestle baby twins out of the car in a tiny space where the doors didn't open properly.

And recently I watched a guy leave his kids in the car (they weren't in child car seats, so old enough) while he parked in a P&C place and popped into the shop on his own, leaving me to wrestle my toddler twins out of the car in a tiny space.

If I hadn't been still trying to get them safely out of the car when he returned, I'd have had a word...

PosyBoo · 19/02/2017 20:42

Hell hath no fury than a parent who feels they've missed out on a P&C space to someone less deserving!!
Whilst there's no disputing it's generally much easier getting little ones in and out of car seats and into buggies with the extra space I would never wait for a space or dream of confronting someone who'd parked in one.
It did piss me off the other day though when I was shouted at by a woman for parking in a P&C space without a child when I had just popped back to the car to grab my wallet and left my DH and DD in the shop. I invited her to look at the baby seat in my car and feel free to come and meet my DH and DD!! Just goes to show things aren't always as they seem in the crazy world of P&C spaces!!!

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 19/02/2017 20:44

I'd have had a word

He could also have had a word back.

You don't own the spaces.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 19/02/2017 20:46

Parent & Child spots have, just like disabled spots, a large free area on either sides to get the wheelchair/ car seated infant/ strapped toddler in and out

P&c spaces are aren't a legal requirement. Disabled spaces are.

Applebite · 19/02/2017 20:47

Pixies - it's not remotely relevant, that was indeed my point. But it's the only case I could think of as to where OP might have got her contract point from. Unless she's somehow thinking of private clampers!

WilburIsSomePig · 19/02/2017 20:51

I swear this thread has made me both laugh and shake my head in disbelief.

I'm not sure what's happened in the 10 or so years since my youngest was born but it appears that many women with young children spend an awful lot of time absolutely livid/angry/giving evils and just generally being angry at everyone else, because they have young children dontcha know and that trumps everything.

Something being a pain in the arse is just that - a pain in the arse. That's all. If someone really can't get their children in and out of a car safely unless they're in a P & C space, they need to consider their parking skills as most people seem to have been able to manage it for years . I can't stand the use of the word entitled, but it seems strangely appropriate here ...

Fitzybelle · 19/02/2017 20:57

I have a 10 year old and an 8 year old but they probably look older as they're tall. I feel perfectly within my rights to park in the parent spaces as they're children. They, like most other kids of their age, can be oblivious to moving cars coming in and out of spaces in car parks. Yes, I am teaching them road safety but it's a relief when there's a space where I don't have to be dictating their every move as they get out of the car and navigate to the shop. I would complain too if someone shouted at me in the car park, especially in front of my children!

howrudeforme · 19/02/2017 21:13

Ooh haven't parked In those spaces for years! Ds only 10 so will do so while we can.

erchissick · 19/02/2017 21:14

All parent and child parking spaces are for children up to the age of 12.

You had no right to argue with the woman. Just as she didn't know your personal circumstances, you don't know hers. To her, you probably looked capable of carrying your baby whereas her 9 and 12 year old may have learning difficulties and may be prone to running into traffic. But regardless of invisible illnesses, (or not) you had no right to argue with her.

Happy101415 · 19/02/2017 21:33

my god how did people survive befor parent and child parking Confused
op- your 6month old doesnt entitle you to priviaged parking ..just park somewere else your not the only person to ever have a c section and have to continue in daily life !!!! how dare you say anything to them while out with their children ??? how would you like some crazy lady attack you in front of your child over a parking space???? get over yourself ..you were wrong !!

Touchmybum · 19/02/2017 21:37

My aren't some of us special, entitled snowflakes!!!

Try being grateful that there is such a facility, adapt and improvise if the spaces are all full! As for starting a row over a space - could you not just have been grateful one was becoming free? What did you hope to achieve by yelling at a family?

You aren't the only person to ever have had a child. I can't stand this attitude - oh hey, I've a baby, everyone get out of the way?!

I've had 3 c/sections and I still get the occasional ache - maybe I should park in P&C with my 13 year old...

Go on with you - have a look at the conditions babies are surviving in, say in Syria, and have a bit of shame and humility!!

AwaywiththePixies27 · 19/02/2017 21:44

my money's on she's bloody fat

Well that's a bit uncalled for. Don't lower yourself to the OPs weight throwing insults there Wink

For the 100th time, BB spaces are a legal requirement. You can't link them in with P&C spaces as the other is not.

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