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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask you what happens if you just stop going to work?

93 replies

VladmirsPoutine · 16/02/2017 22:34

If you just e-mail your manager and tell them that you're not going back ever at all or if you hand in your notice and just decide to not work your notice - what actually happens thereafter? What repercussions can you face?
Posting for traffic - sorry but I'm feeling like doing exactly this.

OP posts:

MrsTarzan1 · 18/02/2017 19:26

We have staff who walk out/don't ever come back all the time - its a high turnover environment. Sometimes they're docked wages if they've not worked their notice but not 100% sure as don't get involved with that side.

counterpoint · 18/02/2017 19:36

Can it be done as constructive dismissal if something has made you feel you need to resign?

Evergreen777 · 18/02/2017 19:47

"Gardening leave" is the colloquial term for when someone is on paid leave because their employer doesn't want them coming in. It's used for people who are being investigated for some sort of serious misconduct, but also sometimes for people in senior roles who have handed in their notice to go and work for a competitor, because their employer doesn't want them finding out things useful to the competition.

I think it's called gardening leave because it's sprung on you at short notice so you can't really go off on holiday or anything so people typically use it to do the gardening.

If you're sure you want to leave, why not hand your notice in and take it from there? Try going in and just working to rule, and see if you can cope knowing it's only 4 weeks?

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 20/02/2017 01:37

I think it's called gardening leave because it's sprung on you at short notice so you can't really go off on holiday

Also strictly speaking the employee is still working so they have to be available to be called in or asked questions about their work.

They can only take holidays in this period if the holidays are approved in the normal way as if they were in the workplace.

Allthewaves · 20/02/2017 01:45

Years ago in retail they used to make u wait 2 months for your last wage

nursebickypegs · 20/02/2017 01:50

Do you have other people to rely on for a reference?

I work in the NHS. At my last job, I had a miscarriage and went off sick. In that time off sick (6weeks), I was offered a new job which I interviewed for prior to my miscarriage (I think I was just pregnant). I wrote my notice and never went back.

My manager did not like this and the reference my new job received was awful. Unreliable, not a team player etc was used. My new job didn't understand this, esp as I interviewed well and my other references were good. Had to explain to my new job my personal problem and what happened.

If you're unhappy and you are sure that this won't make your future troublesome, email. However expect an email back and that they will be wanting explanations. Your best bet is go off sick with stress and anxiety, find a new job and leave.

FreeNiki · 20/02/2017 01:56

Hand in your notice and ask in the letter to be released from your notice early. They may say yes.

That way you get a reference from them etc.

You wont get benefits if you walk out of a job so just make sure you can support yourself.

SockswithSandals · 20/02/2017 01:59

I've had quite a few jobs in my time and I've never ever worked my notice. I've always just not gone back. It's never impacted on me getting another job.

TowerRavenSeven · 20/02/2017 04:58

This happened to me. I was 20 and in a horrible office job, very stressful. I still lived at home and my parents had gone on vacation - I waited until then because I knew they would hassle me about it and this way I could tell them I was fired but I wasn't.

On our break (we all had a break at the same time) I wrote a note and put it on my bosses desk saying I wasn't coming back, that the job and I weren't compatible, etc. I had already planned that morning I was going to leave, so I got all my stuff ready and when the break came I just left my note, left and never went back.

A few days went by and the head of personnel (who scared the wits out of me) called me to ask what happened. I distinctly remember telling her I couldn't talk about it, and I couldn't come back. She told me I had to return to get my last cheque and I told her to keep it - I was overwhelmed I didn't think to tell them to mail it to me.

I never went to get my cheque and I never heard from them again. I never put them on my resume - I had only worked there three weeks or a month - and I told my parents I was fired. I found a good job shortly after. This was over 30 years ago!

Oldraver · 20/02/2017 23:21

I've done this in my last two jobs. The first one I had enough, had been off sick for a few days so just went in to collect my stuff. Luckily my supervisor stomped off when she saw me (she had form for being huffy with everyone) so this allowed me to clear my stuff and just walk out. Emailed my resignation in when I got home.

The last time I knew I was leaving by mutual decision as they wouldn't let me reduce my hours but kept me hanging on waiting for my final letter. I was also waiting for my last pay check which was paid slightly in advance. I worked out when they had paid me until and left on that day

Gwenhwyfar · 21/02/2017 08:26

"I've never ever worked my notice. I've always just not gone back. "

It's find to do it if you're very unhappy in a job, but to do it all the time? It's quite inconsiderate to leave your employer in the lurch like that. If you get along with them, why not give them time to find a replacement or make other arrangements?

Gwenhwyfar · 21/02/2017 08:45

*fine

Mulberry72 · 21/02/2017 09:43

I did this in a job a few years back, I absolutely hated it and had worked there maybe 6 months.

My line manager was an absolute cow, so while she took the team to the pub one Friday lunchtime (except me as she said I needed to read up further on a specific part of my job) I rang my DH in floods of tears and sent her an email basically telling her that I hated her, hated the job and to go and fuck herself and left and never looked back.

The job isn't on my CV, I've just manipulated the dates of the jobs either side of that one.

I've never had any come back and got paid everything they owed me.

Cinnamon84 · 21/02/2017 09:51

I've done it. I was miserable - I just emailed and said I wasn't coming back. They seemed concerned to start but I left with no hard feelings. I was quite anxious about bumping into people from that job for the next 5 years or so but I'm anxious about lots of things so you might be fine!
I was only there for a couple of months so didn't include it on my cv

OddShoe · 21/02/2017 09:55

Quite a lot of people have done this at my work. The worst that has happened is no reference and their wages being a bit messed up. Other staff have had to cover for them which is a bit rubbish but not the end of the world.

Cinnamon84 · 21/02/2017 09:57

Good luck OP- it's shit feeling like that.

In my current job I've felt like doing it again, waited it out and ended up feeling slightly better about being there- I'm not saying you should stay, but sometimes a day can make so much difference and you might change your mind for long enough to work your notice period and leave on better terms

Original poster

VladmirsPoutine · 22/02/2017 20:49

Today I was set up to fail in quite a spectacular way. Notice already handed in but I reckon they want to make this hard for me. I just hate it right now.
I have to go in very early tomorrow to make something 'go well' this was sprung on me last minute and objectives were not made clear.

OP posts:

TeatimeForTheSoul · 28/02/2017 16:01

Vlad that sounds like bullying. Can you join a union to get some support?

Speaking from experience... please try and keep copies of emails and confirm outcomes of conversations by email. It's backside covering but can be really important. Screen shots of stuff can also be useful. Hopefully you'll never have to use it and can just delete at a later date. But if they ever accuse you of anything (as happened to me) you can simply refer to the evidence showing what really happened. Once you've been out of there for a while it's also nice to look back and with certainty say 'I was right, they were knobs'

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