to think my DSD may have an eating disorder? Tell me. Honestly.

[BoccadiLupa]

Have been with my OH for 5 years. We are on the verge of moving in together. I get on with his 2 kids very well, no issues there and it has all been quite seamless.
However, we all went away this weekend together and I realised that DSD (15) was a bit weird on the food front. I had noticed that she had lost a bit of weight recently but she doesn't look too skinny.
But this weekend I saw her all weekend and could see what she was eating and not eating.

So - she barely ate. Well, she did, but always a very small amount, like half a piece of toast for breakfast, refused anything vaguely calorific, etc. She did eat, just not much.
And then - she talked about food constantly - "oh wow I LOVE x or y" and then having precisely none of it.
And the last thing - her younger sister (9) loves her food and ate quite a lot. And DSD constantly mentioned it to my OH "Dad, how can you let her have that - she's having another coke? Dad- she's had far too much sugar today" etc - like she was a bit jealous of her getting to eat what she likes?

Am bit worried but quite nervous of raising it with my OH and have no experience with this and don't want to come off as sounding bitchy...

OP this is terrible and does sound pretty much like an eating disorder.

I'd suggest you take a look at www.b-eat.co.uk/ and get some facts and stuff and info on the right approach, talk to someone there if you can.

www.b-eat.co.uk/about-eating-disorders/worried-about-someone/how-to-talk-to-somebody

Speak to your dh and to the girls mum if that is possible, amicably. The decide how to proceed.

I would definitely speak to her parents first, of course. But I do wish people would stop going on about the NHS being in crisis! If it is, can the people who are paid to sort it out just to sort it! But don't discourage people using the services they have paid for.

Eating disorders can be very serious. Don't discourage the OP from looking for help, please.

What are you talking about User?

The only food the opening post mentions is half a slice of toast for breakfast (personally I haven't eaten breakfast since junior school).

Then the OP goes on to say that she did each 'but not much' and she refused anything 'vaguely calorific'.

One person's 'not much' could well be another person's 'too much', just as one person's idea of 'vaguely calorific' can be totally different to another's.

I would be absolutely shocked if your team would want to see this girl, based only on the opening post.

It's one person's snapshot of one weekend. Surely to god you'd want to speak to the resident parent first??

All sounds typical of me as an ED'd teenager.
And I wore tight clothes too; seeing yourself as very fat is a myth, I knew I was skinny and enjoyed it, and wearing revealing clothes meant I had to be 'careful' as any weight gained would show more. Plus the body check element of needing the smallest size.

Definitely keep an eye, speak to OH/her mum, these things are best caught early rather than left to become her normal.

I think getting some advice from the charity will help you gauge if you are overreacting or being fair. I do wonder if sometimes others can notice things a parent/close friend doesn't. Maybe like the frog in hot water we get used to the way a child/adult behaves and a new pair of eyes might see more clearly.

I hope you are wrong. But be prepared as if you are right.

That behaviour would definitely concern me, yes.