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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be uneasy about postman 'letting himself in'

50 replies

Georgeofthejungle · 08/02/2017 22:48

I just saw another thread about a post man and it made me think about my own post man predicament..

I live in a very rural house in a farming community type area. The post man has been doing this same route for years and years and is very friendly and nice. Every time we have some post that doesn't fit through the letterbox he opens the door slightly and just pops it on to the floor.

Our backdoor (where he pops stuff in) is directly in front of the bathroom and the other day I was walking to the bathroom and he was sticking his head in as he put stuff down, telling me he had a big box for me to sign for..

I can't make up my mind if I am ok with this or not. Am I just being a bit of a princess here or is it a bit weird?

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 09/02/2017 07:18

If you live somewhere that is that rural that you don't need to lock doors insane lol then surely your package would be safe to leave by door outside property

Penrithtearooms · 09/02/2017 07:24

If you want best of both worlds, buildba porch extention and leave that unlocked for parcels but keep the inner door locked. (but that's a bit of an extreme effort for a small thing)

peukpokicuzo · 09/02/2017 07:28

I think leaving your door unlocked implicitly means "I know no one is going to open this door with bad intentions" - because if you don't know that, you do lock your door.

I think the postman is doing fine. His actions are reasonable.

PossumInAPearTree · 09/02/2017 07:34

I used to live at a farm and postie always did this. One time I was sat on the loo having the shits with loo door open directly opposite the external door. Didn't even knock first! He just said hello, I said hello, he put the post on the mat and left!

AgentProvocateur · 09/02/2017 07:36

I live in a town centre and mine does this if I don't hear the bell. I'm happy with it - saves me a trip to the depot to collect.

Athrawes · 09/02/2017 07:37

How about the postie not delivering parcels to home "because I knew you wouldn't be there, you'd be in work, so I just brought it to you!". Glad my parcels weren't ever embarrassing. Work being school. Great service.

Soubriquet · 09/02/2017 07:41

We have an agreement with my postman

If no one answers the door and it's unlocked, he can place the post in the hallway before the inner door.

I don't always hear the door you see so it works well for us

EnormousTiger · 09/02/2017 07:46

My door can't be opened but if I have it left open because I am going in and out (very rare) sometimes parcel deliveries put the parcel just beyond inside which I don't kind.
I don'#t think postmen are supposed to go into the house but it's probably better than your not getting a parcel and having to colllect it later from the depot.
My son is a postman and his colleague has been told off a few times for weeing- last time was on someone's gate post. Definitely not on although they do have a big issue of where to go.

Crumbs1 · 09/02/2017 07:48

Our postie pops things inside for us. Signs for thing too, which is really helpful if we are both out. If we're away he knows where to leave it for us to see on our return. We never lock doors and between reasonable hours friends and neighbours walk in and call out at same time. Some will put the kettle on, if I am lucky.

chatnanny · 09/02/2017 07:49

Reading all these made me feel "glad" (any Pollyanna fans?) it seems Postman Pat is alive and well in the countryside. Particularly love the postman delivering to the school knowing you'd not be home.

Bluebellevergreen · 09/02/2017 07:50

Lock door
Leave note
Sorted

GeorgeTheHamster · 09/02/2017 07:51

Surely this is exactly why you don't lock your door?

BakeOffBiscuits · 09/02/2017 07:54

If you feel uncomfortable then don't allow it to happen. Lock your door.

Fwiw I never lock my door during the day - it does not invalidate my insurance at all if I'm in the house/garden/popped next door. I know people who don't even have keys, so their door is never locked. Seems a bit daft to me to be that trusting.

harderandharder2breathe · 09/02/2017 08:05

He's being helpful. If you don't like it either ask him just to leave things on the front step or heavens forbid, lock your door

DairyingLass · 09/02/2017 08:10

My postman does this, and I'm fine with it. Saves me hassle and him/her too.

Creampastry · 09/02/2017 08:11

Lock your door then ..... is it really that hard to do?!

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 09/02/2017 08:12

My postman does this, I'm also rural. It doesn't bother me at all but it's the done thing round here, I've never really thought about it. The hassle of going to town to pick up parcels negates any worry.Grin

Dothehokeykokey · 09/02/2017 08:20

Our postman does this. To be honest if I happen to be home at about 9:04 and for some reason don't want to to come in that's the only time the door gets locked, in which case he just opens the unlocked garage door and puts it in there, or sometimes on the drivers seat in the car on the drive.

Georgeofthejungle · 09/02/2017 08:21

FWIW I'm not such an idiot that I haven't figured out I can just lock my door and 'problem solved'. That wasn't really my point though.

From all your comments I have gathered that I ABU! I just grew up in the city where everyone is a bit up themselves (me included at times!).. Poor posty. Thanks everyone. :)

OP posts:
GinAndOnIt · 09/02/2017 08:24

The only time we lock our door is if we are going out without DDog - he's our only pinchable thing Grin

This kind of thread comes up a lot though, and there are always people (like me) who love the postman for doing this. If you don't love it, then you have the option to either lock your door, or ask the postman to stop doing it.

Our postman hates delivering post to us two houses as we're on a hill which has to be walked up, but quite often in Spring/Summer, I'm outside and can run down and grab it all off him and save him the walk. Other times I see him in his van further down the road and he will flag me down to take the post. In return, he always puts our parcels in the back door or through bathroom window. He was off sick for two months before Christmas, and I really missed him actually.

fanniboz · 09/02/2017 08:35

I'll make a point of unlocking the front door if I'm expecting post as there's a delivery lady who will pop our packages in the front porch and just ring the bell to let us know. I don't leave the door unlocked if the house is empty though. I'd rather miss the post than that Grin

Crumbs1 · 09/02/2017 08:42

Yes agree GinandOut, if we are on way out and see postie van, we stop and take our post off him or he'll flag us down - save him coming up the drive. If it's something that looks important he'll drop it to my husband's EA in the office on his way back.

Chipsandonionrings · 09/02/2017 08:45

I love in a small town and never lock my door ( but will do from now on in case burgulars browse mumsnet!) . The other day I heard a knock and by the time I had detactached ds from the boob and got to the door I opened my inner door and there He was. It did feel a bit odd as it had only been a minute from his knock but grateful I didn't need to go to sorting office. I have previously chased a postie down the road waving my red card to collect my parcel!

Goes off to lock door!

tricornel · 09/02/2017 10:34

My ex-PIL love to tell the story of when they first moved into their then very rural house in the 60s - came downstairs in the morning to find the postman sorting the letters on the table Shock it was ok though - he'd put the kettle on Grinanother time his sheepdog had had puppies and they woke up to find him training them on the garden (field). They loved him in the end - if any of them ever went away they'd send a postcard to their house addressed to the postman Grin

Same house, different postman, used to leave parcels inside when he found out I had a baby - didn't want to risk waking her. I loved him!

Willow2016 · 09/02/2017 11:55

Not a problem with me, my door is only locked if I have little kids during the day who can open doors!

Actually got a fright yesterday when the door was knocked just as I passed it by the postman! He usually just opens door if I have a parcel that doesnt need signed for but it was locked!

Our posties are great they know where to leave parcels and just pop a note through the letterbox to save me trailing down to the sorting office which is only open certain times. They also 'flag us down' if we are driving past them on our street and they know they have post for us.

But its up to you what you are ok with in the end. Its just a minute to put the stuff throught the door but its your call.

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