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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

...to be really annoyed with DD teacher?

19 replies

sashangel · 06/02/2017 17:15

So, last year DD (8) had a teacher (we will call her miss X). She told me that DD was really struggling with maths to the point I started to pay for a tutor (had to as she will do anything she can at home to not do it). The tutor said that she was really good at the math when it was explained and that she lacked confidence. Miss X was off sick after an operation from around the February so DD got a new teacher. She seemed to do really well and we stopped the tutor. She passed her SATs with flying colours and when I brought up the bad maths with the new teacher at parents evening she was shocked.

So this year DD has miss X again this year and guess what she is struggling with maths again.

2 weeks ago she had homework about shapes (how many sides/edges/vertices) and miss X marked 2 answers wrong when they were in fact correct. I put a note (yes I know) in my DD book to say that she had marked them incorrect and why. DD came home and said miss X asked her to say "thank you for pointing out my mistake. I had a cold and was tired. I seem to have marked some wrongly" (only some)

Today. I was called over to see her and she said that DD got very upset by a maths assessment that they were doing and to work on it at home. She started using words like inverted to describe what they were doing. I asked DD on the way home why she was upset and what she didn't get etc. She said that she didn't understand what miss X was talking about. I asked her why she didn't tell miss X that she didn't understand so she could show her again. She said that she had and was just told not to worry and get upset and that was it.

Now helping my daughter where I can I obviously will. On this occasion I am really annoyed that even though DD has told miss X that she was struggling and didn't understand that she didn't help DD any further. It seemed like it is just I'll tell mum and she will do my work for me. I couldn't understand what she was going on about. I am going to see her again tomorrow with a pen and paper to make notes about what she is saying. I have asked for more maths homework in the past so we could work on it at home and I am still waiting.

Aibu to be really annoyed and upset not just for me but more for my DD?

What would you do?

OP posts:

Trifleorbust · 06/02/2017 17:29

You are not unreasonable to be annoyed, as it seems that the communication in the classroom could be better. Have you explained these concerns to the teacher? She may appreciate the feedback and be able to work on it.

The problem is that if she is s primary teacher, she is qualified to teach your DD Maths with a C at GCSE; there isn't a lot you can do about the fact that primary teachers have different strengths in terms of subject knowledge. I am a secondary English teacher but am qualified to teach primary, which would necessitate me teaching Maths. As long as she is covering the curriculum with enough competence not to worry her manager, there isn't that much you can do.

carefreeeee · 06/02/2017 17:49

Re-engage the tutor and sit it out till the end of the year, hopefully next year she will have a different teacher?

Annoying but these things happen, not all teachers are good and there may not be anything much you can do about it. Try not to let your DD get upset by it though.

NavyandWhite · 06/02/2017 17:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VocalDuck · 06/02/2017 17:57

Sounds like Miss X's teaching methods are not compatible with your daughter's learning. It could be she is a bad teacher or just that your daughter doesn't get on well with her methods and has lost confidence in herself. Either way, I agree about getting a tutor again. It will make things much better for your daughter in school if so.

FearTheLiving · 06/02/2017 18:01

Can she be moved to another maths class with a better teacher?

Trifleorbust · 06/02/2017 18:11

FearTheLiving: And all the other kids? Should they move them as well?

FearTheLiving · 06/02/2017 18:29

That's up to their parents. If my kid was good at maths with me, a tutor and a different teacher then it likely that "miss x" is just a shitty teacher so I would get my child moved.

Trifleorbust · 06/02/2017 18:37

FearTheLiving: And if I was the Head, I would explain to you that it doesn't work like that. She is a qualified member of staff with her performance managed by her employer (who isn't you).

FearTheLiving · 06/02/2017 18:42

Well it can work like that. I moved a maths class when I was at school.
And I wouldn't accept my child's failing grades when the issue is clearly with the teacher.

Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 06/02/2017 18:45

OP, if your DD is doing an assessment, it may be a case of assessing what your DD can do completely independently. In this case when a child asks for help they will simply be encouraged to do what they can, but they won't be given any help as such.

foxyloxy78 · 06/02/2017 18:48

I am sorry but I can't accept that if a child does not understand and asks for clarification, that the teacher does not do her best to help the child understand. You simply cannot sweep it under the carpet. These are the critical years for learning and you can't just say that there are some bad teachers out there or that they are only qualified up to primary level. They have bloody jobs to do. And they need to do their jobs well. If we did not perform in our roles, there would be repercussions. My advise would be to keep up the private tutoring. Also Kumon is amazing. The last thing you want is for your DDs confidence in maths to be crushed because of this experience with the teacher. I would carry on talking to the teacher and keep an eye. Raise with the teacher that you expect tho fs to be explained properly if your child does not understand. If things don't improve, raise it through the formal channels.

Quartz2208 · 06/02/2017 18:51

It sounds like miss x does not understand herself what she is trying to teach

Trifleorbust · 06/02/2017 18:52

FearTheLiving; As I pointed out above, she may be a weaker Maths teacher than she is a Languages teacher, for example. Our school system doesn't allow for primary teachers to be equally strong in all areas. She may be perfectly competent but not brilliant. The OP's DD may be okay at Maths but not gifted. It doesn't make her incompetent (the teacher) so you may not get anywhere by complaining.

donquixotedelamancha · 06/02/2017 18:59

"OP, if your DD is doing an assessment, it may be a case of assessing what your DD can do completely independently."

This. The teacher wouldn't help them during an assessment; if they can't do something, setting catch up homework is fine. YABU to be annoyed at a teacher based on your daughter's perception of their teaching alone; doing things kids like the most isn't always good teaching.

Surely you'd be more concerned if the teacher wasn't flagging up issues and giving her extra work? Make sure you are dead positive and supportive around your daughter and go to speak to the teacher if you are still worried.

bumsexatthebingo · 06/02/2017 19:03

Find out what she's learning about and have a look on topmarks/bitesize etc and explain it to dd yourself. It doesn't sound as if maths is the teachers strong suit but you will get no joy from pointing that out.

cantkeepawayforever · 06/02/2017 19:13

FeartheLiving - in primaries, it is common to teach Maths in form groups. In many primaries, there is only one form group per year - where is the OP's child supposed to go for her Maths lessons?

i can understand your point for a multi-class secondary, with several parallel sets / classes. However, in the vast majority of primaries, 'going to another class for Maths' just isn't possible. I teach the same 30+ children for every lesson of every day. My Maths lessons are pretty good. My art lessons are formulaic. My PE lessons are competent on a good day....

GwenStaceyRocks · 06/02/2017 19:22

I'd have a chat with some of the other parents to try to find out if it's a problem with the teacher or just a clash between the teacher's teaching style and your DD's learning style. If it's the former and a few parents are seeing problems, then I'd make an appointment with the deputy HT or the HT. If it's just your DD that is struggling, then I'd re-engage the tutor.
We had a similar issue with a languages teacher. A quick chat established lots of parents had noticed issues, the HT sat in on some lessons and then appointed a TA to support the teacher specifically in those lessons.

Original poster

sashangel · 06/02/2017 20:44

She is a very good teacher in all other respects. DD is above average in all other areas. She isn't a maths genius and does struggle with maths. She just doesn't seem to get what Miss X is telling her. The way she was telling me what they were doing I couldn't understand but I had 5 minute in the playground.
We skimped to be able to hire the tutor but at the moment it just isn't possible to hire again at the minute (I wish it was) .
There is only 2 classes in the year so swapping teachers for maths wouldn't be possible.

I am thankful that she has flagged it up and I do wish that she would give more maths homework (homework seems to focus on reading and spellings, both of which she is excellent at, rather than maths). A few bits I have tried to help with i have caused more confusion as miss X is teaching her 1 way and I am teaching her another.

I just want my DD to understand and not dread maths lessons as she otherwise loves school

OP posts:

GwenStaceyRocks · 09/02/2017 09:24

Could your DD practise using StudyLadder or a similar website? I've found it helps DS if there is something he is struggling with because it seems more fun than pen and paper. Depending on the topic, there are also short explanatory videos too.

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