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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be irritated by frequent references to 'snowflakes'

124 replies

DailyFaily · 04/02/2017 16:06

I've noticed people using 'snowflake' as an mild insult a lot recently - here, Facebook, real life. It's usually with reference to something reasonably benign or not especially precious (just seen it on FB by someone saying not being allowed to smack your children leads to generation Snowflake, saw lots of it after Brexit/Trump from people suggesting those opposed to it should put up and shut up, saw it here on Thursday for someone who didn't want her nanny to do something which I think a lot of people would not like their paid childcare to do). I'm assuming it's a reference to Fight Club but I really haven't heard it referenced this way until the last few months which is odd given that fight club was released in 1999. I'm sure my irritation makes me a snowflake myself but does anyone find this annoying?

OP posts:
OhtoblazeswithElvira · 04/02/2017 16:54

It makes people who use it sound bitter IMO.

MommaGee · 04/02/2017 16:57

It seriously pisses me off but for quote personal reasons.

My son has CDH and the survival rate at birth is 50%. His was very severe and we are very very lucky. CDH babies are snowflakes - something to do with every baby being different but all equally special and amazing so my baby IS a snowflake and that's an amazing thing to be.

They I join MN and its an insult.

Grrrrrr.

#snowflakeandproud

MewlingQuim · 04/02/2017 16:58

How does it relate to Fight Club? Been years since I saw that film, I cant remember any thing about snowflakes Confused

NavyandWhite · 04/02/2017 16:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MistressMerryWeather · 04/02/2017 17:04

It's from this quote, Mewling

“You are not special. You're not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else. We're all part of the same compost heap. We're all singing, all dancing crap of the world.”

LucklessMonster · 04/02/2017 17:11

No, I think it's a useful phrase that succinctly describes a certain type of parental attitude to a child.

I have seen it on MN because there are a lot of people on MN raising special snowflakes, especially in AIBU.

limitedperiodonly · 04/02/2017 17:12

I wouldn't mind betting that people who use 'snowflake' are also fond of using 'entitled', 'grabby' and 'being that mother' to describe behaviour that I regard as entirely normal and do all the time.

OvariesBeforeBrovaries · 04/02/2017 17:16

YANBU.

It's the new "PC gone mad" - basically "These people won't stand by and let me be racist/sexist/xenophobic so I'm going to call them names". Lazy term used by lazy people who are too scared to actually debate so they resort to calling people "snowflakes" because it's what other people do on Twitter. Same goes for people who call liberal men "cucks".

ClopySow · 04/02/2017 17:21

I cringe whenever someone uses it. It's been around for years, but i always imagine the people who use it think they're terribly original and feel smug as fuck when they've basically just shamed someone.

It's shite and smug and twatty.

miserablesod · 04/02/2017 17:22

Imo its a ridiculous expression and annoys me when people refer to someone kids as special snowflakes in a jeery nasty way.

Yes my children are my special snowflakes. My first child died, i've had a few miscarriages, so yes my kids are precious little snowflakes to me.

KathArtic · 04/02/2017 17:25

Some people like to use the term Snowflake to describe certain types of people, just like some people like to change their user names to Daily Faily to describe certain types of newspaper!!

birdybirdywoofwoof · 04/02/2017 17:28

Very observant kath!

SemiNormal · 04/02/2017 17:29

It is increasingly pissing me off; it's the new 'political correctness gone mad', and generally used to silence voices that are expressing non-populist opinions. -THIS!!

I usually hear it to silence oppressed or minority groups who are complaining about an injustice, usually meant in a sneery 'Oh poor fucking you' kind of way. When ever someone uses the word I assume they're some kind of privileged bigot.

MouseholeCat · 04/02/2017 17:29

I see it everywhere, usually along the lines of "You snowflakes just don't get it" after a story calling out Trump's policies, or in the "snowflakes are overreacting and fragile" sort of way.

I don't rise to it now- it's just a derogatory term used to incense and provoke people who don't agree with right-leaning opinions. The counter to the 'stupid Brexit/Trump voter' type thing. I think it gained a lot of traction on Reddit through the Trump supporter page (can't think of the name now...), so a lot of the times I see it leveraged it's as a form of trolling anyway.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 04/02/2017 17:32

So what insult do you use? The whole point of an insult is to shut someone up, put them down etc.

Or are you all super-intelligent individuals who would never resort to any insult ever?

I totally agree with this >

It's not the expression that's a problem. It's the fact that some people are applying it to situations where you think it doesn't apply. And quite frankly, that could be true of many expressions.

howCanwedo12 · 04/02/2017 17:34

Husband is using the term, its rather pathetic....he's picked it up from the media...I hate these stupid phrases coined in the media, then used by everyone...binge drinker is my most hated....its a pathetic epithet..people drink alcohol, whether they do every night, or just at weekends, I dont care, just dont coin the"binge" about it...its damned annoying..:-)

Rainydayspending · 04/02/2017 17:35

I have not seen it used as an insult for non right wing sentiments. Only as a counter to point out an individual is acting very precious indeed. If it's just not being right wing I'll snowflake myself up thanks.
Hardly an insult Hmm

cherrycokehead · 04/02/2017 17:35

YANBU, I almost wrote this post yesterday, really irritated by the massive over-use of this term. Think of something more original for goodness sake! I think it's made even worse by the normally unwarranted smugness that accompanies it

venusinscorpio · 04/02/2017 17:37

This thread is mainly people sneering at people for sneering. And now I'm sneering at people sneering at people for sneering. Oh dear Grin

RhodaBorrocks · 04/02/2017 17:38

I've seen and used the term for years, as far back as the early 00s on online forums. It did come from Fight Club and refers to the phenomenon of no two snowflakes ever being the same. It was originally used to describe people who were alwats announcing how they (or their kids) were different from everyone else and demanding special treatment.

I use it very self deprecatingly - I have food intolerances so I apologise to friends and colleagues for being a snowflake when I'm asking them to put my special milk in my tea, or order a dairy free meal for a work do etc.

It winds me up when people use it to describe someone they don't agree with or holds differing political views to (see also: libtards) as that wasn't the original context. But as it's been embraced by the wider population, the meaning has changed/been diluted as is often the case.

MommaGee - I'm a CDH survivor (not discovered until I was 17, by which point I was very ill). I didn't realise they are snowflakes too! I'm often lumped in with spoonies and zebras these days, but I prefer my own name tbh. ;)

gandalf456 · 04/02/2017 17:38

Yes. It's overused and would do nothing to stop me from being a so-called snowflake either. In fact, it would make me do it more

NotYoda · 04/02/2017 17:38

Milk

If I'm offering an opinion, I don't insult people. I think it devalues your position to name-call.

You wanker Wink Grin

5moreminutes · 04/02/2017 17:39

I wondered about this term a while ago, and it does apparently originate with Fight Club but gained popularity on Tumblr, so MN were very late adopters.

It was originally used to mean rather more than it does in current MN parlance I think - now its gone from specifically meaning adults with no special needs /no health issues/ no real hardships/ who do expect special treatment from absolutely everyone including those who by rights actually need more help and support to meaning anyone who doesn't put up and shut up.

SemiNormal · 04/02/2017 17:39

So what insult do you use? The whole point of an insult is to shut someone up, put them down etc.

Or are you all super-intelligent individuals who would never resort to any insult ever?

Yes I do use and have used insults. I've never consciously done so to shut someone up - although perhaps subconsciously that has been the purpose, very interesting observation by the way.

However, for me, that specific term I am used to hearing in a very narrow minded way, in a way that has tried to silence oppressed people - I do understand it's not always used that way but I have heard it used to mainly regarding very specific groups such as transgender, non-gendered people, asexual people etc. Whereas the terms wanker/knob/twat etc are far more generic terms that can be applied to everyone equally and don't come across as immediately bigoted imo.

SunsetBeetch · 04/02/2017 17:40

I dislike it as it is very popular in alt right and MRA circles.