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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am probably over reacting

67 replies

Workitbabe · 03/02/2017 22:50

But do you think it is acceptable that dp texts his sons girlfriend and they put kisses at the end. She is 17.

OP posts:
ilovelamp82 · 04/02/2017 03:13

It depends. If he puts kisses on the end of everyone's messages I would say no.

user1477282676 · 04/02/2017 03:48

Why does he text her in the first place? At 17 she's not old enough to have been with your DPs son long enough to have built up a sort if inlaw relationship. It's odd that he'd text her at all!

Italiangreyhound · 04/02/2017 04:13

I don't put XXs normally.

I think it is unusual for him to be texting his son's girlfriend.

Robstersgirl · 04/02/2017 06:56

My OH puts kisses on the end of EVERY text, Ones to my dad, his friends, his own Father! Aibu to think something's going on or he's obviously gay blushsmilewink
My brother (in his 30's) says love you to all his mates at the end of a call. Smile

Original poster
Workitbabe · 04/02/2017 12:17

Hi there. They have been together 3 years. They don't text often but both dp and gf put kisses and smily faces on the texts.
I also find when she is here that they are a bit flirty with each other. She always laughs at what he says and he plays to an audience. It just makes me feel uncomfortable tbh.

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 04/02/2017 12:20

I wouldn't like that at all. I would see my children's partners as similar to my own children, not someone to be flirted with.

AnyFucker · 04/02/2017 12:20

What does his son say about it ?

sohelpmegoad · 04/02/2017 12:23

My mum flirted with all my boyfriends, i didn't like it , but it never stopped her, she still flirts with my DH, but I'm fine with that, its just her character.
Is your husband quite flirty, or is it your Ds girlfriend who maybe sees your DH as fair game to practice flirting with?

VladmirsPoutine · 04/02/2017 12:28

This just sounds all sorts of wrong.

OneWithTheForce · 04/02/2017 12:28

Ewwww.

ImperialBlether · 04/02/2017 12:30

What do they text about? I can't think of an occasion where my son's girlfriend would have to text his dad.

Original poster
Workitbabe · 04/02/2017 13:01

She texted him to say thanks for inviting her over this weekend with the son (he comes over every other weekend). They then exchanged a few texts. I think it's more her tbh being "sweet " but I think it's odd and not right him putting kisses on it.

OP posts:
FlyWaxSleepRepeat · 04/02/2017 13:30

So your partner flirts with his own son's 17 y/o girlfriend Confused. Yes I think most people would be repulsed uncomfortable with that.

Ricekrispiesquare · 04/02/2017 13:37

Do you think she's trying to act more mature than she is and have a whole 'in laws' relationship with you guys and your partner responds out of politeness ?

kali110 · 04/02/2017 14:56

I wouldn't like the flirting, but the texts sound innocent.
I've exchanged texts with past partners parents and there was def nothing going on there!

haveacupoftea · 04/02/2017 15:57

She probably puts kisses at the end of all texts automatically.

He probably adds them on because he's an awkward bellend who is flattered by the attention from a younger woman.

You could always ask him?

KeiraH · 04/02/2017 16:13

Have you spoken to him about it? It's obviously making you uncomfortable and that alone should be a reason for him to stop. In my opinion the flirting and kisses in texts are inappropriate but then again I don't believe in harmless flirting. I would never dream of flirting with anyone that is not my husband. Especially in front of him. It shows disrespect. And I sure as hell wouldn't like my husband getting over friendly and "playing up to the audience" I could just get a little stabby...Halo On a more serious note, just talk to him.

mysteriouscurle · 04/02/2017 16:44

Everybody doesnt put x on the end of their texts. I never do. If he does it to everyone fair enough but id still find it a bit unusual for them to need to text. Odd.

Catrina1234 · 04/02/2017 17:10

Many many years ago my BF's father used to flirt with me (long before the days of texts etc) and I just saw it as having a bit of fun, which it was - never went beyond playing around - it's only years later that I could see that he was a 45 year old man and I was a pretty 17 year old and had an outgoing personality. BF's mum didn't seem to mind at all. I think some middle aged men are going to be flattered by the attention of a young woman in the prime of her life, and maybe middle aged woman too in relation to teenage boys but somehow think the former is far more likely.

OP why don't you tell your dp that you are not comfortable with the way he interacts with son's girlfriend - seems the logical thing to do.

notanurse2017 · 04/02/2017 17:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Workitbabe · 04/02/2017 17:44

He doesn't put kisses on any other texts apart from to me. And today I get home and dp has done some shopping. I opened the cupboard and there was a multibag of pickled onion monster munch. Her fucking favourites. I like them too and he said "I bought them for you". Bull shit. He has never bought them before. Get a room.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 04/02/2017 17:51

Well, are you going to confront him about it or not ?

Original poster
Workitbabe · 04/02/2017 19:52

I don't know. Probably not. Going to keep a watchful eye on it. She has lent him money to pay for a takeaway tonight.

OP posts:
AmberNectarine · 04/02/2017 19:57

I would think that is WELL dodgy. DH only puts kisses on texts to me. I only put them on texts to DH (and female friends if they do). Highly inappropriate tbh.

AmberNectarine · 04/02/2017 19:58

Also, why is a 17yo lending him money??!!