Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really annoyed its going to take so long to get a new coil?

31 replies

SharkiraSharkira · 03/02/2017 17:21

I had to have my mirena out just before Christmas as it had migrated somewhat Confused

Been on the waiting list since then and only just had a call to say they can book me in to have a new one fitted....in March.

Really??!! I hate not having a coil, hate having periods, my hormones are up and down all over the place, my skin is awful and I just want to go back to 'normal' (for me).

On the other side of things its really affecting my sex life with Dp because we have no choice but to use condoms - ordinarily this wouldn't be a big deal except for the fact that Dp is (and I don't say this as a stealth boast at all, in fact in this instance it is quite annoying) really well endowed and we just keep breaking them Blush As you can imagine this is really ruining things for us given that we can't enjoy sex properly at the moment due to fear of pregnancy. Sex is a very important part of our relationship so we are both really missing it, or at least missing how it used to be.

I know it's not a million years to wait but it feels like it! Aibu to be annoyed that they cannot find me any appointments in the next month, even after being on the waiting list for 2 months!

OP posts:
Levatrice · 03/02/2017 17:22

Have you got a local walk in family planning clinic?

Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 03/02/2017 17:38

Well, technically there is one but the morning slots are all by appointment only and it is only open one day a week (on which, I am in uni). All the afternoon drop in slots on that day are only for under 25's and I'm not under 25.

OP posts:
ButtonLoon · 03/02/2017 17:45

Why don't you purchase the XL condoms?

Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 03/02/2017 17:56

I have done button, they still don't fit Blush Those are the only ones dp can use at all and they still break, the only ones we've found that do fit are special order ones you can only get online and they are soooo expensive! I know buying pricey condoms is cheaper than raising an unexpected child but we are really skint at the moment as I've just started a new job and won't get paid till next month. The alternative is just not having proper sex at the moment which we are both very frustrated with.

OP posts:
Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 03/02/2017 19:19

Is this normal? To have to wait 3 months to get a fecking coil put in?! I've had 2 before although admittedly the last one I had put in was a few years ago but have things really changed this much?

OP posts:
Araminta99 · 03/02/2017 19:27

If it's that urgent go private. And re the condoms, you just need to buy ones that fit him better. You can buy condoms for any size.

Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 03/02/2017 19:30

I can't afford to go private unfortunately. Like I said, we can get ones that fit but because they are special order one they are super expensive.

OP posts:
JiltedJohnsJulie · 03/02/2017 19:34

If it's that urgent go private. And re the condoms, you just need to buy ones that fit him better. You can buy condoms for any size.

If the op can't afford the condoms, it's unlikely that they'll be able to go private.

OwlinaTree · 03/02/2017 19:34

I've been waiting for ages for an appointment too. V annoying.

JiltedJohnsJulie · 03/02/2017 19:36

Is there some kind of shortage? I've been waiting for two months too. If it takes much longer I think me and DH will either split up or I'll be up for murder!

colaflower · 03/02/2017 19:37

I got a script for mine last week from the doctor and am due to have it fitted next week- can you not ask if there is another doctor surgery locally that might be able to do it for you?

AverysillyoldHector · 03/02/2017 19:39

Your local sexual health clinic should have a website - there will be more than one clinic in your county where you will be able to have a coil fitted, the details will be on the website. Try ringing the appointment line and seeing where you can get booked in. You might have to travel but you should be able to be seen sooner that way hopefully.

Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 03/02/2017 19:40

Supposedly (in my area at least), it's something to do with doctors taking annual leave at the moment. What, ALL of them simultaneously?! Surely that can't be right?

Glad someone understands Jilted! I just want my body/face/sex life back Sad

OP posts:
AverysillyoldHector · 03/02/2017 19:41

Nurses can fit coils though (well at SH clinics they do).

AlmostAJillSandwich · 03/02/2017 19:41

Maybe its not the condom size thats the issue, but the brand. A regular condom will actually fit anyone, its easy to put one on like a sock (i've tried it, and ive got chunky calves!) and it doesn't dig in or hurt so it's not actually a "thing" to be too big for a condom. Not liking the way it feels is different to it being "too small".
The reason the wait is so long, is there is specific training to insert coils and implants, at my Doctors despite there being 8 permanent docs only 2 are qualified for contraception placement and removal. You also usually need a double appointment (i did with my implant, i asked if i could have it removed at one appointment and replaced at another to speed things up than both in one double app, but you need a double for a removal anyway so wait time would be the same)
As it stands there aren't enough GP's to go around and catchment areas have grown as well as bigger populations, so they are really over stretched. My doctors if you want to see a specific doctor the wait is up to a month, add in the need for a double appointment that has to fit around all their current bookings, the wait time does end up being months rather than days/ a week or two. I do feel your frustration somewhat, when i went to book a removal and replacement implant (after 2 years of no periods or very very light spotting, only on loo paper never on liner, i suddenly had an awful period like i did pre implant, heavy, major cramps etc and thought it had run out.) The first appointment they could give me was 7 weeks away. I was due to have 2 periods during that wait, and i was really anxious about it. As it turns out i didnt get another one, my implant must still have been ok and it was just having a period to get rid of 2 years of build up, but i went ahead with the replacement anyway just incase.

If you really are having such awful luck with condoms breaking and don't feel secure, you could always try a female condom, or use spermicide as a second protection to the condom, or stick to none penetrative sex until you get the new coil. You don't say when in march so it could be a month or closer to 2, but surely a bit of sexual frustration for a few months is preferable to an unplanned pregnancy.

Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 03/02/2017 19:52

Well yes the frustration is better than having an unplanned pregnancy but it is a situation I would rather not be in any longer than absolutely necessary if you see what I mean.

There is only one brand we can buy off the shelf as such, and those are only available from one shop - its the only one that even comes close to 'fitting' (even the 'large' and 'xl' sizes in most brands are too small) and completely understand where dp is coming from when he says they are really uncomfortable. I suppose technically anything would fit but imagine (not wanting to be too graphic), when you wrap an elastic band around your finger? You know how it digs in and you get that red sort of welt where it has been? Similar situation. I totally get why that isn't comfortable let alone pleasureable for him.

OP posts:
Crapfriends · 03/02/2017 21:02

You could always try all the alternatives to penetrative sex? I get why your stressed by this but if your relationship is knocked for six by this then you really need to talk to him about it. Neither of you can help why. You just need to get creative. It might be a good idea to explore alternatives now so you have extras to add to the table when you are free to do as you please with your coil fitted

Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 04/02/2017 17:15

Tbf we have been exploring alternatives it's just that we don't like them as much as PIV!

OP posts:
Slimmingsnake · 04/02/2017 17:21

Have you tried the injection....same as coil no periods

Original poster
SharkiraSharkira · 04/02/2017 17:34

No I don't like the idea of the injection, I didn't really get on with the pill as it gave me migraines and I worry that the injection will do the same but I won't be able to do anything about it Sad

OP posts:
Slimmingsnake · 04/02/2017 20:00

I thought the hormones in the coil were the same as injections and pill...unless you have copper coil and no hormones but then you get periods with that coil....I had injections for 10 yr with no periods.bliss.but I find the pill better,hope you get sorted out soon x

JiltedJohnsJulie · 04/02/2017 20:28

I thought the hormones in the coil were the same as injections and pill.. they may be Slimming but there must be some difference in how they work as the GPs and the hospital won't prescribe me the pill or injection but I'm allowed the mirena. It's because I used to get migraines where I went blind. Not sure what the difference is though.

Slimmingsnake · 04/02/2017 21:34

Cor Julie that's bad if they make you go blind...a friend of mine can't have any hormones in her contraceptives as it sends her loopy...her words....

Slimmingsnake · 04/02/2017 21:35

Actually,I suppose the injections are a hit all in one go,where the coil lets a bit out at a time

PacificDogwod · 04/02/2017 21:38

YANBU to be annoyed and upset about the effects this delay has on your life.

See, that crisis in the NHS/Primary Care? It is real. And it is affecting all sorts of services. This is just one example.

Drs taking annual leave is a red herring IME.

Swipe left for the next trending thread