DP and I have lived together for a few months in a property which belongs to his family member. All bills etc are in DPs name and we agreed to split everything 50/50, so I just transfer my half once a month to his bank.
I'm on paid leave from work at the minute, partner works full time, we earn the same. I have a DS from a previous relationship, DP has no children.
There was a misunderstanding with money and I ended up overpaying for the first couple of months, as well as giving him £100 towards bills before I moved in because he was short.
When we changed the fuel bill over, it turned out that his family member was a significant amount in credit, and they kindly allowed us to use this credit to pay off our first 3 months gas/electric bill instead of seeking a refund.
So for the first few months, I have given DP half our estimated gas and electric costs ( which was a generous estimate to be on the safe side). He has not used this money to pay for gas and electric, and has also had an extra £200+ from me between the misunderstanding and the extra i gave him before I moved in.
I drive a car which costs alot for insurance and road tax (my insurance doubled when i moved) DP does not drive but has full use of the car as I take him to and from work, hobbies, friends and errands in it. I do use the car to get DS to and from school and for my own errands too but I'd say it definitely benefits DP as much as it benefits me. He occassionaly gives me a nominal amount towards fuel but only if he knows I physically do not have cash to put any more in myself.
This month, I have given him £100 less than I normally would. I have told him earlier in the month that I would be doing this but he didn't think I was serious. I am short on cash myself this month, and don't see why I should be giving him an extra £50 for no reason plus paying gas and electric which isn't currently costing him anything.
I have next to no spare cash, my hair is a mess, my clothes are well past their best, the car needs work done on it, I spent my Christmas money on household costs and things for both of us when i would have loved a little bit to enjoy for just me. He isn't well off either but is more inclined to spend money on himself if he has it to spare whereas I'd spend it on the three of us or sometimes just on him.
I realise we need to have a conversation about money again and sort this out, but AIBU to think that giving him £100 less this month is perfectly justified? Especially since the extra I have paid in the past has left him with disposable income to spend on his hobby but I've had nothing.